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Re-inspiration...

Pattii

Active Member
Time of past OR future Camino
(2016)
I don't know if this has ever happened to any of you before but I would love to know how to get out of a slump I am in.

I wanted so badly to go on my Camino this year I could taste it. It seems like one thing after the other has hindered me from actually getting there. It's my 50th birthday this year and all along I thought I would be walking the Camino this next month. When I found out that I couldn't go this year I planned for next year settling with going to the Dominican Republic to do something...anything to take my mind off my camino but still keep me stoked for travelling. Now because of my foot I am even unable to do that. Surgery is needed so I wait yet again to get going.

I've waited so long and longing so badly to go that I've worn myself out and find that I an not so much losing interest as I am losing hope.

So what I am asking is if firstly anyone has had this experience...setback after setback...and how you coped and if those of you who finally made it there and even those who were able to get there no problem can re inspire me to keep the faith as it were...
Seriously...a photo...a memory...something to look forward to and plan. I have scoured every resource I have so maybe something new I can read or visit on the web...
Thanks
Pattii
 
Technical backpack for day trips with backpack cover and internal compartment for the hydration bladder. Ideal daypack for excursions where we need a medium capacity backpack. The back with Air Flow System creates large air channels that will keep our back as cool as possible.

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I had long been planning a major excursion to mark my 50th birthday, looking forward to several weeks or months of travel as I had done years ago, when fate played a wild card and everything changed. After a nightmare month I emerged from a lawyers office minus my house, my business and only partial access to my child. Life had to start anew, so I signed up for four years retraining at university and finally when I graduated walked the North camino. It was worth the wait. I had a ball. It showed me that there is a time for everything. Two years later I am about to set off again. Your time will come, hang in there!
 
Ideal sleeping bag liner whether we want to add a thermal plus to our bag, or if we want to use it alone to sleep in shelters or hostels. Thanks to its mummy shape, it adapts perfectly to our body.

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If it calls to you then go! We are in beautiful Santiago after walking from Sarria with two children .
Now my son is talking about doing the Camino from St J. He loved it.
No blisters,bedbugs or scarey experiences found.
Buen Camino
 
I really feel for you.
Don't loose hope, can you possibly use crutches for 100k? That stretch is doable, you just need to slow down.
I can't speak to having to wait, I was blessed it worked out.
Yet take the obstical & turn it to a challenge. The blisters may not be on your feet...
Keith
 
Last year, just 6 weeks before we should have set out, we were told I could not walk the Camino for health reasons. Planning for this year and revising our ideas kept us going. With no health problems we have just completed our Camino and have to say that this year was the right year for us to walk. Why the problems? Part of life. However then end result was better than if we had walked in 2014. God is good, so hang on and look to the future.
 
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I don't know if this has ever happened to any of you before but I would love to know how to get out of a slump I am in.

I wanted so badly to go on my Camino this year I could taste it. It seems like one thing after the other has hindered me from actually getting there. It's my 50th birthday this year and all along I thought I would be walking the Camino this next month. When I found out that I couldn't go this year I planned for next year settling with going to the Dominican Republic to do something...anything to take my mind off my camino but still keep me stoked for travelling. Now because of my foot I am even unable to do that. Surgery is needed so I wait yet again to get going.

I've waited so long and longing so badly to go that I've worn myself out and find that I an not so much losing interest as I am losing hope.

So what I am asking is if firstly anyone has had this experience...setback after setback...and how you coped and if those of you who finally made it there and even those who were able to get there no problem can re inspire me to keep the faith as it were...
Seriously...a photo...a memory...something to look forward to and plan. I have scoured every resource I have so maybe something new I can read or visit on the web...
Thanks
Pattii

I worried that my back would not be good enough, and at one point, considered biking!
 
I wanted so badly to go on my Camino this year I could taste it. It seems like one thing after the other has hindered me from actually getting there.
Patti, Seasons and dates in our lives can seem so important. I am sorry that you won't be making it to Santiago for your 5oth birthday. It is clear that your discouragement comes from a strong longing to do your camino, which has been repeatedly frustrated. If you feel the frustration and the longing is still there, that is your calling crying out to you to. Treasure it and go when you can.
 
@Pattii

I hope a memory speaks as well to your situation as the excellent insights above.

I wasn’t even planning to be on Camino the first time! As a result, when diverted by circumstances, I was a lousy pilgrim. It took me until just past Astorga to recognize that dropping judgmentalism would lighten my pack considerably. Yet, arriving at SdC was (being nice here) un-inspiring.

Not until I reached the Galician Coast did I have the insight that there really is a reason for everything. If I would just consent to abandoning expectation then things might smooth right out.

And so things did smooth out despite obstacle after obstacle coming my way in walking back to SdC. Having no expectation about “how things should be” allowed me to see the opportunities that were available in the “now”. Then and now, I regard the presentation of those opportunities as simply miraculous.

When I arrived at the Cathedral the second time, just a week after the first, it was an overwhelming experience.

I sense that you are being set up for a very rich Camino experience which has already commenced.

Try abandoning expectation now. The schedule is only yours to plan. And not many plans go un-revised to completion.

B
 
Get a spanish phone number with Airalo. eSim, so no physical SIM card. Easy to use app to add more funds if needed.
Hi Pattii,
I think it was four-ish years from wanting to go on the Camino before I actually got there - and I didn't have as good a reason as you for not going. Now that I've been and come back I realise that one of the reasons I didn't go immediately was because I had such high expectations of the Camino "changing my life" having read that statement from so many others!!! Expectations have always been a huge trigger for me in fear of failure - and so I preferred to dream of how it could change my life rather than actually do it in case it didn't change my life.
This may or may not be making any sense to you!! Anyway, to be honest, it didn't change my life! But it did teach me a lot about myself, and that whole expectation scenario and my issues around dreaming rather than doing - and that in itself has been a journey. Maybe that was the real Camino for me.
I thoroughly enjoyed walking the Camino - the beauty and the history of it uplifted my soul. Maybe it did change my life in what it taught me about myself, but totally not in the way I expected it to!
Go when the time is right and whatever happens will be the right thing for you.
 
Pattii,
Why don't you join the virtual camino that @nidarosa started on this thread https://www.caminodesantiago.me/com...ino-walk-this-summer.33892/page-2#post-318943.

Get out a guide book, decide on a starting point, get your search engines ready (Google and YouTube provide a lot of info and virtual experience), and start walking. Go as fast or slow as you want, staying in Virtual Paradors (which are free) or in albergues (where snoring is silent but still deters bed bugs).
 
Bawling my eyes out reading these...thank you a million times ....truly you all know the longing and the need. You are indeed my Camino Family.
 
St James' Way - Self-guided 4-7 day Walking Packages, Reading to Southampton, 110 kms
I've been planning for years to go...Since way before the move The Way came out. I have the guide books and have read many books and autobiographical accounts of the journey. I have planned it down to the KM. I have decided already for the most part where I will stay and what I will do in each area I am in. I have studied the maps and the food made my lists to bring, checked them twice. Checked them 3 times. lol. I have organized where to buy everything I need, and have waited to buy things after my shoes are purchased (other than a few items that I already own). I can't wear my boots anymore because of my food and so have wanted to buy walking sandals or basic walking shoes. Can't do that till the foot is mended because I have no idea what the fit will be. I can't get my orthotics till the foot is better and can't buy the shoes till I have the orthotics. After that is done my plan is to start with the backpack (mine is old and heavy) and start filling it. Two years ago when I decided to go this year...RIGHT after I made the decision my knee blew and it was over a year till I could walk properly and of course not walking you get out of shape...I gained some lbs. and pretty much had to start again. As soon as I was able to start walking again an old ganglion which I had had removed years before decided to act up. It grew ..fast...oddly so it was opened. When it was opened the Dr. discovered dormant bacteria which promptly flared up and became abscessed and we started to treat it a few months ago, knowing I would not be able to go on my Camino. So I decided I would go to Dominican so that I could wander around Santo Domingo and of course stay at a resort and hopefully recover. It got worse...more antibiotics and then a huge reaction to the antibiotic...lol. So now I am unable to go to Dominican either for fear of huge medical issues and bills. So. This trip has been on hold for years and I really thought a jaunt over to a new country I've not been to before would hold me off for a while so I wouldn't go nuts for wanting to travel. Not to be. Now I am in Edmonton. It is July 1 (Happy Canada Day) and I am counting down to my birthday, thinking wow, I should be planning on watching the running of the bulls right now. Starting my walk in France and moving towards Pamplona for my birthday(thought that would be an amazing way to celebrate my day!) And I am not. So I do appreciate you all taking the time to encourage me to keep going. It does feel like I'm being squeezed down this little path...getting more and more narrow by the day ...isolated from what I want to do and the people I want to spend time with. It's a very difficult time indeed. Of course losing my brother a few months ago has compounded my need to get out and move and escape the everyday and have a bucket list experience. This is not to be so. No complaining. I understand God works all things to my good. But I have been sad...almost wondering if I was moving down the wrong path. It is what it is I always say but I want it to be something else...and its not.
And so I wait.

I wrote a song years ago with that as the title. I thought about it again today.

And so I wait
To hear my heart
Beating in time with Yours.
Softly You call;
I linger here
Conscious of the reckoning-
I'm aware of the awakening
And there's nothing in myself that I can do
But be still.

And so I wait
Change comes so slow
To my impatient heart
There is no gain
That I can see....
Although there are fathoms left to wander
I know my wicked heart will ponder
All of the choices left unmade-
Yet I will remain
Faithful.

Just wanted to share that.

P
 
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I bet you never thought of your song as prophetic when you wrote it!
 
The one from Galicia (the round) and the one from Castilla & Leon. Individually numbered and made by the same people that make the ones you see on your walk.
I bet you never thought of your song as prophetic when you wrote it!
I really didn't. Funny thing ... that song has been true several times in my life but never more true than now. It was written over a decade ago. I thought things were a waiting game then...lol. I guess it was all training for the BIG wait!...lol
 
Patti, what beautiful lyrics. Thank you so much for sharing them. What I have found motivational for me this past year is going to night school to learn Spanish. I am so looking forward to trying it out in Spain! I will finish the final level a week before I leave on my Camino after 12 months of study. I hope you find your motivation again.
 
Reading your post and the responses makes me wonder about my own reason for ever walking. I walked before "that movie" was released and when it was just a pilgrimage known to me. Several years of serious heart and health issues we saw our window of opportunity before us only to be one day into the CF and my best half fell from the upper bunk and broke her heel, Camino ended. That was in October of one year and May we were off again, Marine determination (I'm not the Marine. :). ) fought a wicked battle to get back asap.

After finishing my/our first Camino I realized just what I walked for. It wasn't just being in Spain, or meeting the people or enjoying the great wine...I understood my greatest Camino was playing out every day and has been for 62 years (+361 days), life and our faith is about the most spectacular Camino anyone could ever ask for. Don't consume your daily Camino for what could have been or paths you might have walked in Spain. We are all part of a grand Camino and if you are meant to walk, you will, if not today or this year then tomorrow.

Chin up, smile and greet each day with a buen Camino...and know your path will some day bring you to the Camino de Santiago or somewhere more incredible.
 
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Ideal sleeping bag liner whether we want to add a thermal plus to our bag, or if we want to use it alone to sleep in shelters or hostels. Thanks to its mummy shape, it adapts perfectly to our body.

€46,-
I don't know if this has ever happened to any of you before but I would love to know how to get out of a slump I am in.................

...........and if those of you who finally made it there and even those who were able to get there no problem can re inspire me to keep the faith as it were...
Seriously...a photo...a memory...something to look forward to and plan. I have scoured every resource I have so maybe something new I can read or visit on the web...
Thanks
Pattii

Pattii,
Seems to me you already have your re-inspiration - in the lyrics of your song.

Your body is letting you down, (for the time being I hope), try to remember that is out of your total control.

Your hope, spirit and faith are in your full control. Keep them alive whilst your body heals and your Camino dreams can one day come true.

The Camino is going nowhere and will wait for you to say hello in person.

Buen Camino
 
Patti, what beautiful lyrics. Thank you so much for sharing them. What I have found motivational for me this past year is going to night school to learn Spanish. I am so looking forward to trying it out in Spain! I will finish the final level a week before I leave on my Camino after 12 months of study. I hope you find your motivation again.
Thank you. I think learning Spanish really well might help a lot. I was taking some online and audio lessons but I think this year I will actually go to a class...making a solid move towards being there.
I know I am stuck. It's been a really tough year of loss for me. I am coming to terms with much of that loss...and I think I had grand ideas of "walking it out". I have to motivate myself again and find things like the spanish lessons to hang on to so I don't get completely sucked under the big waves.
I am trying to think of my day to day life as my Camino and just keep going, "walking" as far as I can each day and giving myself kudos for pressing through.
I really appreciate the encouragement from all of you.

Blessings,
Pattii
 
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St James' Way - Self-guided 4-7 day Walking Packages, Reading to Southampton, 110 kms
Thank you. I think learning Spanish really well might help a lot. I was taking some online and audio lessons but I think this year I will actually go to a class...making a solid move towards being there.
I know I am stuck. It's been a really tough year of loss for me. I am coming to terms with much of that loss...and I think I had grand ideas of "walking it out". I have to motivate myself again and find things like the spanish lessons to hang on to so I don't get completely sucked under the big waves.
I am trying to think of my day to day life as my Camino and just keep going, "walking" as far as I can each day and giving myself kudos for pressing through.
I really appreciate the encouragement from all of you.

Blessings,
Pattii

Patti:
I just finished an introductory Spanish course at the University of Calgary. I too had done an online course, but I wanted more. It was great, but not enough, as I am going in the fall. If you are interested, sign up somewhere and take the opportunity to be able to communicate well on your camino. I shall be taking another course when I return, but it won't be the same. All the best and may your camino come soon.
 
Hi Patti!
I was in a somewhat similar lot years ago so I do have some understanding what you are experiencing. I was ready for my next-great-adventure when I was diagnosed with cancer. Shortly after treatment there was no way I was strong enough physically or mentally for the journey, but I desperately wanted to go. I had so many thoughts about being forever changed and destined to a life on the sofa for the rest of my life … like an old horse put out to pasture (yes…I had a massive prideful pity party!)

I had an epiphany…by the grace of God…. that I needed to be flexible and redefine my participation in my adventure…and life…until I was ready to fully participate as my 100% healed self. So I decided to get off the couch and join as a volunteer. What a joy it was to just be around "my people" while I supported and served them in their journey. It helped my stay focused on what my life WOULD BE like after cancer and gave me something to aspire to. Years later I'm good as new (well almost! :rolleyes:) and I look back fondly on my participation as a volunteer hanging with my outdoorsy brothers and sisters. I aspire to volunteer on the Camino some day when I retire or if a time should arise that I'm unable to be physically active myself.

I believe I read the you are in Edmonton which is somewhat close to the Pacific Crest Trail. Perhaps there are opportunities for you to volunteer there…close to civilization where medical care is close at hand should you need it? If not there, maybe there are other locations in your beautiful country where you could be with hikers/walkers and volunteer while being inspired and motivated at the same time.

Just a thought! Be blessed, Albertagirl!

-Beth
 

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