After the Camino

[wilkinsonsworld]

Hello everyone
I will start walking the Camino with my son on the 21st September (yippee!!) I’ve been training all year, on beautiful quiet country roads and going camping to remote places so that I can walk quiet paths in safety. Along the way I’ve meditated and encountered the most amazing flora, insect, animal and birdlife imaginable. Just the training has been such a spiritual journey for me – I can’t imagine how blessed I will actually be on the Camino. I just can’t wait.

Of course, this has taken up a lot of my time and my weekends (I've walked over 600 kms in my training). I was startled the other day when a friend said that I will probably be glad when I get back and not have to train so that I can get a life again! Am I missing something here, because I definitely don’t feel I’ve lost my life- in actual fact I feel it’s been totally enriched and simplified.

Did any of you find that you didn't fit in with your friends’ way of thinking, or had outgrown them, when you got back from a Camino?? Is this a big problem with family and friends on your return?

I'd love to hear your thoughts on this.
Thanks.
Jane

 

[tyrrek]

Hi Jane!

You're well prepared for your Camino! I hope, and I'm sure you will have an amazing time.

I did my first Camino in April-May 2011. It is a truly memorable experience. I found that when I got back it was quite difficult to describe to people. Here in the UK the Camino probably isn't as well known as in some other places so friends thought I'd just been on a walking holiday. It's so much more than that. You don't want to bore your friends, and it can be difficult to express some of the spiritual elements to the more secular ones.

You're lucky that you're walking with your son, so you'll have someone to talk to about the experience afterwards who understands. That said, I think the Camino means something different to everyone.

I found that it was my relationship with 'stuff' that changed, more than with people. I had a big clearout of my house before I left. When I got back I went through and did it all again! The Camino mantra of 'if you think you MIGHT need it, you don't' came into play. Now I question myself whenever I'm thinking of bringing new 'stuff' into the house. Not an unhealthy change, I think!

Buen Camino!

Keith

 

[Tia Valeria]

Our training Jane is like yours, enriching. So was the Camino. I would say that we have 'got a life' with all that.
Sitting eating our snack yesterday, while out training for a return to the Camino next year, we saw a little wren. Lovely. They are so shy and small that they are not easy to see. Flowers, insects as you say. What more could we want.
Sadly not all ones friends or family will want to know, which is sad, but it is their loss not yours so don't let it detract from your enjoyment and the experience.
Buen Camino to you both

 

[Deleted member 3000]

Admit it, walking a camino is a bit odd, like doing a triathlon, sky diving, or watching golf on TV. It is not realistic to expect others to share your enthusiasm. You may be changed, but don't expect change in those around you. If you have found inner contentment with the experience, abide in it. Others eyes will glaze over after a minute of your description of the experience, even if they have initiated the inquiry. Don't keep talking after you have lost the audience; it just makes you a bore, like the person who goes on and on about a Harry Potter book. You are unique, just like everyone else. It will have to be enough.

 

[Arn]

I believe that any experience one has....out of the ordinary and safe zone of most people...will garner the initial "fifteen minutes of fame" and then be replaced by the next.

When you train...especially if you've not really trained for much before...folks will take notice. Not because they may be interested...but rather you aren't as available to be around them as you had been.

"Why are you doing this?" Is another question that may surprise family and friends, especially your answer: to find myself, to fill in time between jobs, following a loss, etc. Some are going through a return to the Church and this is the connection you want. Spiritual is always a safe reason...it seldom is met with, "I can't see what you get from any religion!" comment.

On your return, there's a sigh of relief, a comment on did you find yourself, or are you finally ready to get back to a "real" life.

Years later, especially if the Camino was a once in your life time happening...a grandchild or even one of your children will find your scallop shell and ask the question:

What is this, or what was it like on the Camino?

This is your opportunity to reach back and bring your fondest recollection to light because your audience really wants to know.

 

[annelise]

I totally agree that it is not easy to convey 'that camino feeling' to family and friends.

On my return I started to write out my rather detailed and personal day-to-day diary – personal in the sense that it included both ups and downs, pains and happiness, failures and successes. Halfway concluded, I offered it to family and select friends suggesting that I would in no way be offended if they 'could not find time or inclination' to read it.

For good reasons (broken shoulder and now new shoulder), I have had to leave it unfinished for some time (will now take it up again – able to type again!). But those who read the first part of it are now clamouring for having the rest, and I have even been asked whether they would have my permission to forward it to friends! – Yes, of course!

So, therefore, I would suggest that one way of conveying the 'camino feeling' would be to keep an honest diary.

 

[tyrrek]

I agree with Annelise - one of my few regrets is not keeping a diary. That just means I'll have to do the Camino again, doesn't it?!

According to my Mother some of my extended family (cousins etc) were absolutely fascinated by the whole idea of me doing the Camino, and some expressed an interest in doing it themselves. (Unfortunately they live hundreds of miles away and I haven't caught up with them in person yet.) Maybe this is the reaction to expect; either genuine interest and enthusiasm, or alternatively just politely asking 'so what was the weather/food etc like?' I guess we just have to work out which is which!

 

[wilkinsonsworld]

Thank you everyone for your thoughts. I guess it all boils down to the fact that you are doing the Camino for yourself alone - not for your friends or family. And yes, I guess it is odd walking so far when you're supposed to be on holiday.

It's just so nice to plug into this Forum and chat to folks who've been there, done that, got the T-shirt, or are planning to do it, because they totally understand why you are so focussed and obsessed about the Camino. Whenever I have doubts or fears, this is the place to log on to in order to have them totally swept aside by everyone else's enthusiasm.

Thanks again and look out for my blogs - I can't resist keeping notes, diairies and all sorts of things to remind me of my wonderful experiences.

Jane

 

[robertt]

I've found most people back home to be positive, but not too interested in details. Through a blog, however, you'll find those who are very interested. Much interest was sparked for me by reading the KiwiNomad before departing for Le Puy. I was delighted to catch up with sagalouts at Conques, after meeting him through this forum, and later to follow his photos and blog.

When people stress the downside of the internet, I like to list all the things I couldn't have known, bought or done before its inception.

So you blog, and we will read!

 

[Deleted member 3000]

I would add to my remark: odd is not bad!

I have provided information in email blog form to more than one hundred friends, and not a single one has decided to make a pilgrimage. I do have about six who have expressed interest, but so far, they all have declined my invitation!

They would like to be odd, but something holds them back.

 

[mmonomm]

i agree with most of your posts.

it's hard to explain what you experience on your camino. for me, now, after returning home from my 3rd one, was even harder to explain why did i go for the 3rd time??? when people asked me this question... i think you don't have to tell anyone your most inner experience. who is not moved to do the camino, will not be interested in hearing you... just as a big news: how many km-s did you walk per day? and questions like this.... and that's all... you will be probably "an odd person" for him/her.

as for those who want to do the camino... there is different.. they ask serious questions about your experience, and they are really interested in hearing the answer... and you won't be a "freak" in their eyes, but somebody who is a little bit envied, because you were already there, where they want to be.

 

[AJ]

Admit it, walking a camino is a bit odd, like doing a triathlon, sky diving, or watching golf on TV. It is not realistic to expect others to share your enthusiasm. You may be changed, but don't expect change in those around you. If you have found inner contentment with the experience, abide in it. Others eyes will glaze over after a minute of your description of the experience, even if they have initiated the inquiry. Don't keep talking after you have lost the audience; it just makes you a bore, like the person who goes on and on about a Harry Potter book. You are unique, just like everyone else. It will have to be enough.

This is what a lot of my friends and acquaintances think. However, they are unanimous in saying:"that AJ has a bloody good life!!"