Following one's heart or one's head?

[karenfromcali]

I have been pondering this question this morning. I am wondering how many pilgrims walked the camino against opposition? There are so many practical reasons for not doing this pilgrimage. It is not an easy decision to leave family/friends/work for several weeks/months. What was the reaction you received when you decided to walk? Were you supported? How did it turn out?
Look forward to hearing your stories.

Just want to clarify that my camino is still full speed ahead and can't come fast enough! Thread is simply to share one another's experiences and perhaps encourage anyone facing discouragement.
Ultreya

 

[Deleted member 3000]

They deny it to this day, but I suspect my family had a pool going on when I would quit!

Follow your head when you get on the Camino. Up until then, you will make the right decision.

 

[karenfromcali]

They deny it to this day, but I suspect my family had a pool going on when I would quit!

That's too funny as mine has one too! Only they aren't shy about telling me!! lol.

 

[wayfarer]

My wife had been listening to me bang on about the Camino for about twenty years so she was glad to see me actualy walk it. She came to St Jean to see me off and she met me in Santiago for the finish. The journey made me a bit more relaxed about life but sometimes the "old me" makes an appearance.

 

[karenfromcali]

My wife had been listening to me bang on about the Camino for about twenty years so she was glad to see me actualy walk it. She came to St Jean to see me off and she met me in Santiago for the finish. The journey made me a bit more relaxed about life but sometimes the "old me" makes an appearance.

That's really neat that your wife did that for you. I had in fact hoped to walk the last 100 km with my family, or at least one of them. But it wasn't meant to be. You are either 'called' to the camino or you are not.
I'm definitely hoping to trade in the 'old me' too as I walk. Looking forward to seeing what the 'new me' will look like. Or if there will be any changes at all...

 

[domigee]

Like Falcon, I knew they thought I would quit after one day or so...tehe My youngest daughter even told me so afterwards!

This is my first post btw and I don"t even know I to quote....Sorry.

I always wanted to do the 'Camino' but only managed once my children were grown-up. My husband had never heard of it and thought I was absolutely raving mad.... He was not happy! So I went to the library and borrowed the only book they had, the Shirley McLaine one, to show him... And gasped! Lol Not the best thing ...

I have now done two caminos from St Jean to Santiago, my husband is hooked too and has done one and a half, coming to meet me last Summer in Astorga. I am so pleased, it did sound 'mad' at the time when I was trying to explain, but all was revealed when he did it himself.

A fantastic experience. All I can say is GO....

 

[Anniesantiago]

I have been pondering this question this morning. I am wondering how many pilgrims walked the camino against opposition? There are so many practical reasons for not doing this pilgrimage. It is not an easy decision to leave family/friends/work for several weeks/months. What was the reaction you received when you decided to walk? Were you supported? How did it turn out?
Look forward to hearing your stories

Reaction was mixed.
Some who knew me said, "That's mom! She'll be fine!"
Some who didn't know me thought I should be afraid.

I have always ALWAYS followed my heart.
Then, as someone else said, once on the Camino, you should follow your head.
All well be well.

Do it!

 

[GettingThere]

So far I've actually found less opposition than expected - my employers willingly gave me 3 months off, to my great surprise (I had been planning a battle!). We'd been expecting more opposition/expressions of concern to be directed at my mother, who will be almost 79 when we start our Camino next September - to the extent of delaying telling people about it for a while after we decided to go because she was worried about the reactions, but so far there has been none of the expected "What? At your age?!" even though most of our friends hadn't heard about the Camino. It helps that she is very fit and healthy so it's not much of a stretch to imagine she can do it. Most have been enthusiastic - or to our faces at least! There may well be a pool going in the background, and I am sure there are some who think we're mad but are too polite to say. My father died 7 years ago next May, and my sister 20 years ago in April, but I know both would have been enthusiastic - Dad would probably want to come along, and my sister would have thought we were all mad but not have wanted to be left out so would have come too (I think!). One or two of Mum's family will probably be a bit worried as the departure date approaches but so far are supportive.

 

[karenfromcali]

Like Falcon, I knew they thought I would quit after one day or so...tehe My youngest daughter even told me so afterwards!

It really does sound 'mad' doesn't it. My tickets are booked and I am ready to go. I had just wondered upon the experiences we have all had trying to get there. For some I know it was straightforward, but for others it has been more challenging.
So happy to hear you and your husband are now hooked into the camino together
BTW..I haven't read the Shirley McLaine book. Sounds like it could be ...interesting? lol

 

[karenfromcali]

Reaction was mixed.
Some who knew me said, "That's mom! She'll be fine!"
Some who didn't know me thought I should be afraid.

I have always ALWAYS followed my heart.
Then, as someone else said, once on the Camino, you should follow your head.
All well be well.

Do it!

Mine are more along the lines of "that's mom...this is going to be interesting" lol.
It can be good to follow ones heart... I'm just trying to learn to do so

 

[karenfromcali]

So far I've actually found less opposition than expected - my employers willingly gave me 3 months off, to my great surprise (I had been planning a battle!). We'd been expecting more opposition/expressions of concern to be directed at my mother, who will be almost 79 when we start our Camino next September - to the extent of delaying telling people about it for a while after we decided to go because she was worried about the reactions, but so far there has been none of the expected "What? At your age?!" even though most of our friends hadn't heard about the Camino. It helps that she is very fit and healthy so it's not much of a stretch to imagine she can do it. Most have been enthusiastic - or to our faces at least! There may well be a pool going in the background, and I am sure there are some who think we're mad but are too polite to say. My father died 7 years ago next May, and my sister 20 years ago in April, but I know both would have been enthusiastic - Dad would probably want to come along, and my sister would have thought we were all mad but not have wanted to be left out so would have come too (I think!). One or two of Mum's family will probably be a bit worried as the departure date approaches but so far are supportive.

That's great that everyone has been so supportive. It can make a world of difference. If I have learned anything from this forum it's that age doesn't factor into the camino at all! I hope you and your mother have an amazing time together!
I'm sorry to hear about your father and your sister. I love that you know that they would have been enthusiastic for you, and the , to go. My mother died 7 years ago in April. But I KNOW she would have had plenty to say about my going!! She was Scottish, and not one for mincing words..lol. But at the same time I think she would have been proud of me

 

[gerardcarey]

It is not an easy decision to leave family/friends/work for several weeks/months.

You must have different family/friends/work than me.
I don't care how much I care for them.....I'm gone.

 

[karenfromcali]

You must have different family/friends/work than me.
I don't care how much I care for them.....I'm gone.

lol. Well done Gerard!! My family is pretty supportive except for the odd one or two. I don't believe any of them actually think I will make it though!
I posted the thread to just hear each others stories

 

[Trish MacGregor]

So far I've actually found less opposition than expected - my employers willingly gave me 3 months off, to my great surprise (I had been planning a battle!). We'd been expecting more opposition/expressions of concern to be directed at my mother, who will be almost 79 when we start our Camino next September - to the extent of delaying telling people about it for a while after we decided to go because she was worried about the reactions, but so far there has been none of the expected "What? At your age?!" even though most of our friends hadn't heard about the Camino. It helps that she is very fit and healthy so it's not much of a stretch to imagine she can do it. Most have been enthusiastic - or to our faces at least! There may well be a pool going in the background, and I am sure there are some who think we're mad but are too polite to say. My father died 7 years ago next May, and my sister 20 years ago in April, but I know both would have been enthusiastic - Dad would probably want to come along, and my sister would have thought we were all mad but not have wanted to be left out so would have come too (I think!). One or two of Mum's family will probably be a bit worried as the departure date approaches but so far are supportive.

Hi there.... I hope to see you there! I'm doing my first Camino September next year .... I got the 3 months off work too .... and it may very well take that long! Where abouts in NZ are you from? Good luck with training and preparation. Cheers, Trish.

lol. Well done Gerard!! My family is pretty supportive except for the odd one or two. I don't believe any of them actually think I will make it though!
I posted the thread to just hear each others stories

It really does sound 'mad' doesn't it. My tickets are booked and I am ready to go. I had just wondered upon the experiences we have all had trying to get there. For some I know it was straightforward, but for others it has been more challenging.
So happy to hear you and your husband are now hooked into the camino together
BTW..I haven't read the Shirley McLaine book. Sounds like it could be ...interesting? lol

Hi Karen ... my tickets booked too ... makes it all a bit more real don't you think? Are you off in the spring or autumn next year? Trish

 

[nellpilgrim]

I have been pondering this question this morning. I am wondering how many pilgrims walked the camino against opposition? There are so many practical reasons for not doing this pilgrimage. It is not an easy decision to leave family/friends/work for several weeks/months. What was the reaction you received when you decided to walk? Were you supported? How did it turn out?
Look forward to hearing your stories

Hi Karen, to the question head or heart? I'd answer neither (well let the two of them chatter about the pros and cons ad nauseum-as per usual) but listen to your 'gut'! It's not intellectual or emotional but rather a distillation of many things that have probably been 'simmering' away for a some time though, because that final 'eureka' moment can bubble up suddenly, the decision seems somehow irrational or crazy or...... 'instinctive' But generally if one considers the whole process (often retrospectively) the real driving sources/motivations/catalysts have solid foundations in ones life journey.
Choosing to make pilgrimage-going on the Camino etc is therefore the most 'sensible' of decisions made by an expert (you on yourself) after a lifetime of research (your life to date).
I made a teenage promise (at 17 years old) to myself that I would go on the CF 'when I was old' to see all the wonderful architecture and history en route. It's a promise I kept (note to self make lots of 'crazy' promises to myself for my eighties and nineties!) but of course the reasons my 50 year old self actually kept that promise are richer and more complex than those youthful aspirations. However I will admit it was useful to have a simple, rational, indeed rather 'manly' (sorry) gung ho one line explanation " because I promised/said I would" to give when asked 'Why?' by certain corporate parties (not thank God my husband and nearest and dearest) for the very reason that it meant they didn't have to really engage and the corporate 'why' box was ticked. I got my time off-result all parties happy!

 

[Deleted member 3000]

I haven't read the Shirley McLaine book. Sounds like it could be ...interesting?

It is an interesting perspective from twenty years ago, but she seems to confuse her imagination with reality, so she comes off as a lunatic. It is possible that the Hollywood years have eroded her differentiation of a script from life. Not everything that our minds conjure up is "true." LSD causes random firing of synapses, but many of the visions exist nowhere else but the one mind at one moment. MacLaine seems to confuse her synapse firings as reality. If she wrote L. Ron Hubbard-style science fiction, it would be much more entertaining!

 

[gerardcarey]

It is an interesting perspective from twenty years ago, but she seems to confuse her imagination with reality, so she comes off as a lunatic. It is possible that the Hollywood years have eroded her differentiation of a script from life. Not everything that our minds conjure up is "true." LSD causes random firing of synapses, but many of the visions exist nowhere else but the one mind at one moment. MacLaine seems to confuse her synapse firings as reality. If she wrote L. Ron Hubbard-style science fiction, it would be much more entertaining!

Pop Physcology

 

[nellpilgrim]

......I have to confess I did rather dally with the notion of informing the HR Director that the reason I had to go on pilgrimage was "that unfortunately it's a penance given to me by my Father Confessor and the only one he believes to be appropriate and fitting for my (pause) well you know..... failings." And then enjoy watching the execs struggling to shift their perception of me from 'core team member' to 'office wild child'.........but I bottled out!

 

[IngridF]

I have been pondering this question this morning. I am wondering how many pilgrims walked the camino against opposition? There are so many practical reasons for not doing this pilgrimage. It is not an easy decision to leave family/friends/work for several weeks/months. What was the reaction you received when you decided to walk? Were you supported? How did it turn out?
Look forward to hearing your stories

Pre-Camino I followed my head... you know all that planning one thinks one has to do, on the Camino I followed my heart, post-Camino I now follow my heart all the time with the odd "head" interference. Some of the old me is pushing its way in... it's time for a Camino refresher course. Once I decided to walk the Camino, my husband raised his eyebrows and in his usually manner said "now, don't get religious on me", my then 29 year old son gave me a high 5 and a"you go mom - don't get lost" ... now why would he think that, I never get lost and my then 32 year old daughter said "you are a nutcase mom, and totally awesome". To the delight of my husband, I didn't go religious, but he does enjoy my camino serenity, I didn't get lost - I actually found myself and my daughter still thinks me to be a nutcase and totally awesome.

Next time, I will be gone for 3 months

 

[indyrem]

I have been pondering this question this morning. I am wondering how many pilgrims walked the camino against opposition? There are so many practical reasons for not doing this pilgrimage. It is not an easy decision to leave family/friends/work for several weeks/months. What was the reaction you received when you decided to walk? Were you supported? How did it turn out?
Look forward to hearing your stories

I started training in 2012 for my Camino in the summer of 2013 and I got different reactions from family & friends. My husband & middle son were supportive but my oldest son wanted me to break my pilgrimage in 2 or 3 stages . He was worried I might not be able to make it. He said I was not on the best of health considering my age. Friends were too polite to ask why. Closer friends asked me if I have lost my mind to walk 550 miles. Well I made it with no blisters just the occasional knee/leg pains. Told them it was the best thing I have done in years and will walk the Camino again. I miss the Camino.

 

[Al the optimist]

I had no opposition at all. Having decided to walk the Frances I prepared for and walked the Ingles first to test myself physically (not realising it was a mental test too). Although some (especially the 20/30 year old's) said that even though they were sure they couldn't do it they would show enough faith in me to pay in advance their promised money for a local charity hospice if I did.
PS IngridF 's "serenity". Someone actually used that on me the other week! I have to confess I quite liked it.

 

[obinjatoo@yahoo.com]

If your heart says walk a pilgrimage, do not deny it... Western culture dictates that we work ourselves nearly do death while we are young so we can retire when we are older. When we are older, sometimes we find it's too late to "take that bucket list trip".... Western convention is damaging to heart, mind, body and soul... I know. My livelihood is made sadly from people who's psyche's do battle everyday with not fitting the mold or the ability to keep up with the demands of that western convention and try to satiate the need in less than healthy milieu. Do it for you... Let the cosmos guide your footsteps not anyone else's opinion...
Buen Camino!

 

[jpflavin1]

It sounds to me as if you are back on the fence about walking or not. I believe this is very normal for anyone trying something out of their comfort zone. You have been on the forum since July and are overwhelmed, I assume, with information. As the time approaches you will probably be come even more anxious. This is normal.

Here is a quote I found a while back. I am not sure where it came from or the original author.

"There are many things in life that will catch your eye but few that catch your heart, pursue those"

Follow your heart but use your head.

Pack light, start slowly (let your body adjust) and let the Camino be your guide.

Ultreya,
Joe

 

[Deleted member 12253]

My family think I am mad, but my daughter joined me in sarria and walked? to Santiago with me , at least she joined up with me for dinner as she had no money (student) we still talk about our adventure, just off mountain in west off Ireland , training for my next adventure .

 

[bsewall]

I was amazed with the universal support I receeived from family, friends and the people at work. But in the end their support had little influence on my decision to go. I had received a call, a deep beckoning to my heart, and it would not be denied.

My head is good at keeping my body in one piece. I try to let my heart rule everything else.

 

[freescot]

It sounds to me as if you are back on the fence about walking or not. I believe this is very normal for anyone trying something out of their comfort zone. You have been on the forum since July and are overwhelmed, I assume, with information. As the time approaches you will probably be come even more anxious. This is normal.
jpflavin1 who has posted above.

hi Karen, I've had plenty of opposition because my Camino's are usually quite long, but I've gone nonetheless. It's JP's bit that caught my eye because I have a strong internal resistance to setting off which usually attacks me early in the morning when I am a cosy bed. For a week or two before I set off I lose my desire to spend everyday in the open air walking. Comfort is very addictive! So I am sure that is normal, not to mention all the other possible disadvantages of being away for weeks which will vary according to our circumstances.
Of course, once on the Camino, I can see these temptations for their true worth. How unhappy I would have been if I had put off any of my Caminos!!
John

 

[karenfromcali]

It sounds to me as if you are back on the fence about walking or not.

Nope..not on the fence. Post is for fun/interest only

 

[mralisn]

Nope..not on the fence. Post is for fun/interest only

Hello,

I initially hesitated to respond here because I knew so many others would make my same point. They did. I enjoy reading all of them. Everyone here has always been incredibly supportive and patient.

However, you wrote the word, "fun". Yay!

Although you were referring to this thread, I'm compelled to share how much FUN I have on the Camino. I have an absolute blast. Somedays I am beaming, and I don't beam. I laugh at nothing, waddle up hills, run down hills, play with puppies, eat as much chocolate as I want, drink wine in the middle of the day. Of course there is much more. My fun comes from the elevated spirit and the greatness provided by the Camino, the beautiful people I meet, the silence, prayer, and reflection I receive. Tending to others, having an open heart, giving time. These too provide.

We often talk of blisters, heartache, pack weight, shoes, snorers. Of course I have these frustrations as well. However, as I've written before, my worst day on the Camino is better than my best day anywhere else.

I can't be discouraged. My spirit gets fed. My friends like this.

Keep a smile,
Simeon

 

[Tumbleweed]

karenfromcali - you are going to have the time of your life!

We who walk the Camino are aliens to those who don't, we speak a different language, we walk a different path. We even trust in and follow yellow arrows. How many people can understand that?

Oh and I follow my heart, always in all ways.

Peace be with you and my the Lord guide your steps.

 

[Kiwi-family]

Those who did not approve of our family walking last year kindly said nothing! But we only did 300km then.
Telling them about the 1,000km coming up on my own with the four youngest kids raised a few eyebrows - usually they said something along the lines of, "I guess you found out last year what it's like and you know your limitations and you walk a lot at home." Sometimes they secretly ask the kids if they really want to go;-)
Telling people that we are sending two of our kids to India while I walk with the little ones got the biggest reaction, the best of which was, "Oh, how does your mummy heart feel about that?" To which I replied, "I suggested it!"

 

[Mark M]

lol. Well done Gerard!! My family is pretty supportive except for the odd one or two. I don't believe any of them actually think I will make it though!
I posted the thread to just hear each others stories

You will complete this walk. I am confident of that.

 

[karenfromcali]

Hello,
Although you were referring to this thread, I'm compelled to share how much FUN I have on the Camino. I have an absolute blast. Somedays I am beaming, and I don't beam. I laugh at nothing, waddle up hills, run down hills, play with puppies, eat as much chocolate as I want, drink wine in the middle of the day. Of course there is much more. My fun comes from the elevated spirit and the greatness provided by the Camino, the beautiful people I meet, the silence, prayer, and reflection I receive. Tending to others, having an open heart, giving time. These too provide.

Awesome post Simeon! Have read it several times...then come back and read it again! Hoping my camino looks just like this!

 

[karenfromcali]

You will complete this walk. I am confident of that.

Thanks Mark