I know Karla personally, having met her though friends a few months before her Camino. We had dinner with those friends and I listened to her talk, dreamy eyed, about what her Camino would be. Having done the Camino once, I bit my tongue, knowing she would find out the truth of the matter herself. When people ask me about the Camino, I say it is "wonderful and terrible!" Much like the GREAT OZ!
I admit to being angry, sad, and confused myself these days on the Camino. Maybe even a bit disillusioned. The Camino is a great learning experience, even if what it teaches you is that there is no place like home. I am struggling myself, after being sick for 10 days, after failing the VDLP due to heat and lack of water. But I am happy to have finished the Frances sections I missed last time around and I am on my way to The Peaceable Kingdom to visit Rebecca and figure out where to walk for my last month here.
Somebody needs to write a book about the REAL Camino, I think. Too often, the Camino is made out to be a wonderful wonderland, full of goodness and love, when in reality it is a walk where you meet many challenges. Those challenges can include longer than expected, tiring walking, blisters, sore and pulled muscles, gut upsets, flashers, thieves, lack of sleep due to unfamiliar beds, snorers, bedbugs, and along with the Camino angels, a good supply of Camino devils... or people just wary and weary of pilgrims. Some, you overcome. Some, you simply learn you NEED to overcome. All stretch you and help you grow, even if like Karla, you learn that TODAY, these represent boundaries for you. Maybe tomorrow, she might try again.
I remember my first few weeks of kindergarten. There was a girl, I still remember her name, whose mother walked her to school every single day. (we walked alone to kindergarten in those days) And every single day she SCREAMED for her mother for the first half hour of school. She was forced (by law) to attend, and she did, of course, graduate from high school. But the first few weeks were very traumatic for her. The first time I tried to ride a bicycle, I fell off onto my face. After the scabs healed, I tried again and succeeded, but it took a few weeks to muster up my courage. The Camino forces us, often, to face life outside our comfort zone. It is also a good thing, I think, when we learn to appreciate what we have, and that is sometimes the BEST lesson of the Camino for me.
Many pilgrims I speak to go through Camino Shock the first week. Most do not have the luxury of turning back home. I think that is good... they are forced to move ahead and meet challenges.
Do not get me wrong, I love the Camino, and there are wonders around every corner. I love Spain! I love the people, the land, the food, the language. But there are days when I just wish I was home... dark, depressing days when I long for the comfort zone of my own bed, my own kitchen, my big lovely BATHTUB and as much hot water as I want to pay for, and people who love me and understand me.
I think that from reading some of the posts on the forum, some new people get the idea that it is a cakewalk... and it certainly is NOT that! A hefty dose of reality, along with encouragement and helpful hints, might be better on occasion.
Posts such as Karla+s are good reminders that there are doses of negative along with the positive. And it truly is all about finding balance for me.