Not getting it

[sharpetravel]

Hi have been on the Camino for a week after waiting for about 4 years to walk it and frankly I am not getting it. While I like the surprises of quaint churches and cow bells the whole experience is proving to be a bit of a big bore.
I told myself to come with no expectations to be open to what each day brings and it seems so far like a lot of work and not much joy in return.
Help!

Although you told yourself to go with no expectations it seems you took some anyway as it sounds like isn’t not meeting your needs. Doesn’t every day of life just brings with it what it does and your perception says if it’s interesting or not??? I’m starting the Camino next week and am certain I won’t find seeing something different and walking with different people boring. Even time alone will be well spent as there are so many things to ponder...I really can’t wait.... Buen Camino

 

[Storyteller Matt]

Hi have been on the Camino for a week after waiting for about 4 years to walk it and frankly I am not getting it. While I like the surprises of quaint churches and cow bells the whole experience is proving to be a bit of a big bore.
I told myself to come with no expectations to be open to what each day brings and it seems so far like a lot of work and not much joy in return.
Help!

I am walking a stage of Frances for the first time next month. Not sure what to expect, but for years I hated hiking. Then, at the urging of friends, I walked the quite steep (but short, only 2.3 km) Chemin de Nietzsche and something changed. I've spent two years working up to this, but I have my fears of boredom setting in. You feelings seem very legit. I'm glad you've posted this. In a way, it kind of gives me permission to change my plans if I run into a similar wall on the Camino.

 

[gypsy9]

Mary’s not responding because she’s walking..reflecting...seeing blue skies ...dusty roads ...Spanish villages—possibly enjoying herself: agree regarding walking alone—a challenge which is liberating and perhaps an antidote for “boredom”—like Life, the Camino sure has its ups and downs, small joys and times of ache...

 

[domigee]

Perhaps you will get your nerves back and start the thread if you title it, "It might be better to walk alone." Then you are free to discuss the pros and cons and not feel like you're giving advice, but rather food for thought.

That does sound much better!

 

[Pink Girl]

Hi Mary, I also doubted pretty much the entire first week of my Camino. For me, it was major homesickness. Sometimes the mind plays tricks on us because of the jet lag, physical exhaustion, and change in schedule. I agree with the other people here that maybe giving it another week would help. It took me about 1.5-2 weeks to get settled and then I fell in love with the people and experience.

I found the walking very meditative. I would try not to think about anything other than walking mindfully (flat feet, clenching my abs, shoulders back, etc) as a way to clear/rest my mind (which I really needed at the time). Maybe this would help you? Maybe it would be even more boring.

I left the Camino at Sarria because my Camino sent me on a different path. The Camino gives you what you need, not necessarily what you want, and you may need to stop walking even if that isn’t what you wanted in the beginning. Nothing to be ashamed of! I went to Sweden. Where would you go? Wouldn’t it be wonderful to have 4-5 weeks to explore Europe. I’ve always wanted to go to Granada. And just because you stop early this time or pause for a bit doesn’t mean your Camino is over. The Camino might call you back! Buen Camino!

 

[Deleted member 56069]

Life is too short to be doing something you are not enjoying. Go to a ALSA bus terminal and go to Madrid or Barcelona and enjoy your time in Spain.
Honestly my family, especially my wife's family when we describe our Camino trips and typical days think it sounds completely horrid! They completely can't understand why anyone would purposely do something as hard sounding as what a Camino is. They love all inclusive resorts and cruises...which I have done, but now bore me to tears.
Anyway, Spain is much more than Camino life, so go to plan 'B' and do something in Spain that brings you joy.

 

[John H.]

Hi have been on the Camino for a week … Help!

While I enjoyed the physical challenge of the CF, it wasn't until almost the last day before arriving in Santiago that I really began to understand and deeply value the gift.

Mary, I pray that you will encounter the beautiful and soul-satisfying experience and refreshment of simple community while on your Camino.

 

[Deleted member 3000]

Mary’s not responding because she’s walking

She checked out the Forum this morning, but did not make a post.

 

[MichelleElynHogan]

Ok, I will be Response # 109:

Mary, you say you have started the Camino with no expectations. Is it possible that you are getting out of it exactly what you have put out there to the Universe?

Do you enjoy encountering many new and different people? Has there been a chance to meet and converse with them? See, for some, they are not people oriented. They may be introverted. I am, or was.

Your experience to date is not uncommon. The travelling daily, every day can be boring. Perhaps talking to folks can help? Find some with common interests. Take this topic and join a table full of Pilgrims and put it out there for discussion. Maybe an answer can be found, right where you are?

I will pray for you to find the answer that works best for you.

 

[jdickson]

Mary, perhaps all these responses will help you find your "Way"

 

[Robo]

I think unfortunately, in our 'enthusiasm' to support a fellow Pilgrim, we can have a tendency to go a bit overboard..... This happens a lot. Some OPs we hear from again, some we don't.

Imagine posting a question or sharing a doubt that has taken you a while to pluck up the courage to post.....

And you wake up with 50 replies the next morning. Lots of differernt advice and questions. Talk about Peer Pressure!

Hopefully Mary has made her decision, whatever it was, and is feeling happier now

 

[Keith H]

I think unfortunately, in our 'enthusiasm' to support a fellow Pilgrim, we can have a tendency to go a bit overboard..... This happens a lot. Some OPs we hear from again, some we don't.

Imagine posting a question or sharing a doubt that has taken you a while to pluck up the courage to post.....

And you wake up with 50 replies the next morning. Lots of differernt advice and questions. Talk about Peer Pressure!

Hopefully Mary has made her decision, whatever it was, and is feeling happier now

This really hit home. For me, at this moment, the Camino is about releasing myself from responsibilities. It’s about being ‘free to do what I want any old time’ as the song says. After a lot of years of looking after everyone else I’m looking forward to that aspect quite a bit.

And meeting people, and hearing their stories, and vino tinto y blanco. But first and foremost just walking with no deadlines, no plans, no hardline start and stop times.

I hope you found strength in the posts above Mary! I know I have.

Gracias Peregrinos

 

[BobM]

There were plenty of times on my long hikes when I did not want to saddle up in the morning and press on. But my long walks, started when I was no longer a beardless youth, alas, have given me some of my most precious life experiences. Possibly even better experiences are yet to come on future walks.

There is no pat answer that will instantly resolve all doubt for those who question the value (for them, at that moment) of the Camino or any other long walk. Having the courage to face that question is admirable in itself, but even more so to share those doubts in public such as in this forum. Not many people would do that and it shows (to me at least) that such a person is not one of the herd, but dares to think and speak independently.

Bob M

 

[Alyn]

I remember my first week early April 2018, after wanting to do this walk for 20 years, I thought to myself, "okay, I got this, I don't need to walk to whole way to Santiago, let alone Fisterra; although I have always loved walking, it's sometimes painful (physically and psychologically)." But I continued to walk.

I remember meeting pilgrims along the way who were saying that they had completed the Camino 3, 4, ...7 times and wondered what was wrong with these people, there are so many other places to visit in the world! I thought it must be like having babies, you forget the pain of labour after 18 months-two years and want another one.

My husband and I completed the walk from SJPP to Fisterra 34 days later, in May 2018 and we both have missed it since. Maybe I have missed it more. I think, once I let go of all my anxious thoughts about my pain, the weight in my backpack the first week (overpacked at the very last minute), the next hill going up or down; can I really complete this Camino? etc. Once, I let go of those thoughts (and they continued to pop in every now and again) I was more in the present moment (which I thought I was doing in the first week).

Today, I am so grateful for being able to complete the Camino Frances with all its challenge. I'm grateful for having the choice of taking the time to walk it. It gave me a chance to get to know myself better, to improve the relationship with my husband of 36 years. In the end, the whole experience of walking the Camino de Santiago enriched our lives with the all the people we met along the way, the communal dinners we participated in (I highly encourage people to do this), the wonderful memories of the Spanish people's hospitality and the sceneries. I'm now planning the next one!

 

[JillGat]

Perhaps you will get your nerves back and start the thread if you title it, "It might be better to walk alone." Then you are free to discuss the pros and cons and not feel like you're giving advice, but rather food for thought.

A couple of times, when I knew a less interesting etapa was coming up - heading into Burgos, that long straight roadside walk, with kilometer markers to rub it in and make it worse (can't remember where that is now) - I arranged to walk with others I'd met along the way. The rest of the time, except for some very short sections, I walked alone and waited till the end of the day to socialize. What impressed me is how much MORE I saw and experienced, walking alone, without the distraction of a walking buddy.

 

[VNwalking]

that long straight roadside walk

Could it be the endless road after Mazariffe? Oy.......it goes on forever. Walking that the first time was a reminder that I was not walking for fun, because it was the epitome of boring. Oddly the second time, it was completely magical. Well...I never know how things will 'hit me,' and it has more to do with me than with the place itself.

 

[Jackieduda]

Hi have been on the Camino for a week after waiting for about 4 years to walk it and frankly I am not getting it. While I like the surprises of quaint churches and cow bells the whole experience is proving to be a bit of a big bore.
I told myself to come with no expectations to be open to what each day brings and it seems so far like a lot of work and not much joy in return.
Help!

First, i must congratulate you on your honesty! Now, if this were me, i’d give it a few more days to move me and if it didn’t i would head for the shore. And if you are inclined to head south, try Morocco for a real taste of the exotic. You are on an adventure and there are no rules. Keep moving till something moves you, then stop there and enjoy your vacation.

 

[Syncro]

Perhaps you will get your nerves back and start the thread if you title it, "It might be better to walk alone." Then you are free to discuss the pros and cons and not feel like you're giving advice, but rather food for thought.

I'm not an introvert by any means, but I absolutely enjoyed myself so much more by going solo and walking alone. It's not to say, I was never walking in the company of others, because I did many, many times and it was wonderful. It's just that sometimes our paces were different or the conversation naturally took it's course and it was time to simply to say goodbye and move on solo. Everyone kind of accepts this as a truism and I don't think many get offended. I would find it hard to fully experience the beauty of the Camino if I walked with someone the whole time. I think it''s a great thread to post!

 

[Jan Holmquist]

It is strange. After three Camino France, one from Porto and one walk Finisterre-Muxia I felt fed up with Santiago and Caminos in Spain.
The last CF in april this year, never more was my feeling.
But after some weeks at home I start planning new walks. Dont understand the fascination, the attraction.

 

[twh]

twh said:
Hi Mary,

I'm so glad to know that you made it to Santiago and that you are grateful for it.

Is it ok if I share this information, limited to the sentence above, on the thread you started? I'm sure many there would be happy and relieved to hear this news. I think they would also prefer to hear it from you but I respect both your privacy and your choice of when and what to say about it, if anything. From the popularity of your post I know there is an interest to hear your impressions and thoughts and how things changed or did not change during your walk to Santiago. Everyone has their own individual Camino and there is no "right way" to do it or experience it or react to it. The more opinions expressed the richer the story becomes of this unusual hike across Spain.
Wishing you all the best and I won't pester you again.
Tim Hardman

Mary's response below:
Sure please share I am so grateful for all the kind words of support.

 

[Jeff Crawley]

Marmite is always good

Just seen this. You obviously didn't go to school in the vicinity of the Marmite factory! On a hot summer's day with a northerly breeze we couldn't have the windows open because of the smell - either Marmite or the nearby gasworks - guess where I went to school?

They used to have big freight loading doors and I've seen people cross the road to keep as far away as possible from the smell - thank goodness it's now a Tesco superstore

 

[Jeff Crawley]

It is strange. After three Camino France, one from Porto and one walk Finisterre-Muxia I felt fed up with Santiago and Caminos in Spain.
The last CF in april this year, never more was my feeling.
But after some weeks at home I start planning new walks. Dont understand the fascination, the attraction.

One time I said to the volunteer in the Pilgrim Office that it was my very last Camino. He smiled, handed over the Compostela and said "See you next year!"

 

[VNwalking]

Great, thank you, Tim.
I was likely not the only one wondering how Mary was getting on.

And congratulations to you, @Mary Ward!!
Good for you for persevering. And thank you for your honest and touching post that started this thread. Its very good thst people get a balaced view of the camino - it's not always a bed of roses.

 

[trecile]

Can someone point me to Mary's post where she talks about finishing the Camino??

 

[Deleted member 3000]

Can someone point me to Mary's post where she talks about finishing the Camino??

No. She dropped by, but did not make a post on the Forum.

 

[Robo]

twh said:
Hi Mary,

I'm so glad to know that you made it to Santiago and that you are grateful for it.

Is it ok if I share this information, limited to the sentence above, on the thread you ! ? I'm sure many there would be happy and relieved to hear this news. I think they would also prefer to hear it from you but I respect both your privacy and your choice of when and what to say about it, if anything. From the popularity of your post I know there is an interest to hear your impressions and thoughts and how things changed or did not change during your walk to Santiago. Everyone has their own individual Camino and there is no "right way" to do it or experience it or react to it. The more opinions expressed the richer the story becomes of this unusual hike across Spain.
Wishing you all the best and I won't pester you again.
Tim Hardman

Mary's response below:
Sure please share I am so grateful for all the kind words of support.

Great to hear that Mary made it
Hopefully we'll hear more about her journey, but if not that's cool.
Just glad to hear it all worked out for her,

 

[twh]

Can someone point me to Mary's post where she talks about finishing the Camino??

To Trecile and others: I private messaged Mary yesterday and she responded succinctly. I then responded with my copy/paste above (could not figure out how to "quote" a private message and then post it here in the original thread) hoping she might choose to elaborate and maybe she will at a later date...I really hope she does as I'm sure many of you do. It seems like there is an interesting story there. However it might be very awkward to tell it if her walking buddy also reads this forum or is likely to discover it at some time in the future. This is just speculation on my part. She did not mention anything to me about what changed on her walk, only that she made it and was grateful for it. In my own selfish way, it's not very satisfying other than we know she is safe and she made it with her partner and really that is the most important news about this story.

 

[John H.]

Hi Mary: Is there any more you can tell us about your Camino experience after the fact? I am curious to read the conclusion.