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Search 69,459 Camino Questions

Not just sad now... Very sad.....

Lee Woodhouse

Active Member
Time of past OR future Camino
September 6th 2016 I get to saint Jean, I plan on staying here 2 nights as I don't get there till late on the 6th so will set off on September 8th So if anyone is in Saint Jean at this time and wants a little wine... Give me a shout!!! ;)
Hello my Camino family, many may remember my other thread titled "Sad". Well mother's battle against cancer had ended up being very short. We didn't even reach the point of treatment. I was hoping that as she was getting treatment I wouldn't be able to do the camino as I would have been caring for her. But very, very sadly the cancer was got much bigger very quickly... The only this positive I take from this is that on the day of her death she had been sedated for 2 days before and had just slept... But the day of her death I noticed her breathing getting slow so I sat next to the bed held her hand, she opened her eye and looked right at me, I kissed her head and said "You know we all love you" and she stopped breathing.... Now as an only child, what better way for your best friend to leave this world... and another sad thing is as this was going on my Father has been in hospital and is still there, he knows but I keep thinking that has he truly taken in what has happened.... And today I get the date for her cremation... I almost fell to the floor, it on her birthday 14th June... I plan to walk my camino as planned in September, it was my mother last wish...and I'm going ahead with it.... I just want my camino family when they see me to walk up to me, say nothing and hug me... With this heavy trouble on my shoulder as I walk and reflect on this year I need as many hugs as I can get... Thank you, thank you all xxx Good night mum xxx
 
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I am so sad for your loss Lee. There is not much I can say, except I lost my mum a few years ago and can understand a little of what you are going through. I hope your Dad gets well soon too.

Lee, if I see you on the Way this year I definitely have a big hug waiting for you. Until then, both you and your Dad are in my thoughts.

Best wishes,
Davey
 
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So sorry to hear this, Lee. My deepest sympathies to you and your father. May your mother rest in peace and may you have a blessed Camino. She will be very proud of you and will travel with you in spirit!!
Buen Camino
She will that, I plan on having some of her ashes made into a glass pedant spart of her will travel with me xxx
 
I am so sad for your loss Lee. There is not much I can say, except I lost my mum a few years ago and can understand a little of what you are going through. I hope your Dad gets well soon too.

Lee, if I see you on the Way this year I definitely have a big hug waiting for you. Until then, both you and your Dad are in my thoughts.

Best wishes,
Davey
Thank you so very much, you kind words have tears in my eyes.... But nice ones, thank you xxx
 
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Oh Lee:
I am so sad for you. I was with my mother when she died. She was my best friend. I know how you feel. I am weeping for you and for all of us who will miss our mothers all our lives. My God be with you in your sorrow. I pray that you may be much blessed on your camino.
Thank you, sadness is a very personal thing, you know where I'm coming from... Thank you, thank you.... I have no words, but will send you a big hug and accept a big, big hug from you and send you a big hug from me xxx
 
Hello my Camino family, many may remember my other thread titled "Sad". Well mother's battle against cancer had ended up being very short.

Lee, so sorry for your loss. I just lost my own mother quite suddenly in early April so my heart goes out to you.

You, your mom and your family will all be in my prayers.
 
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OMG, mate, I didn't know... I truly feel your pain, just like foot steps in the sand, lets carry each other across the camino... two brothers in pain xxx
 
Lee
It is a hard part of life, during my walk I literally felt my mothers presence who had passed that year before I began. I also was with her when she took her last breath.
After you are done with the walk if you go to Madrid try to go to the Prada & into the basement where the paintings of the early pilgrims on the Camino are kept. My connection with her was even amazing there as well.
God bless
Buen Camino
Keith
 
Dear Lee,
You are fortunate to have had a mother who could also be a best friend...and how good it is you gave each other the gift of presence at the end. My heartfelt condolences for this loss...it is a very big one.
My Mum died when I was 20 and though I've lived twice as long without her as with her...well, while I can say that the grief has faded, the gratitude is only getting bigger. So how wonderful you will be able to bring her on the Camino with you, to share the goodness, and to slowly heal.
Have you thought of walking for your Mum? You can get a Compostela with her name on it--there have been mention of that here on other threads but I can't find them.
 
The 2024 Camino guides will be coming out little by little. Here is a collection of the ones that are out so far.
Hello my Camino family, many may remember my other thread titled "Sad". Well mother's battle against cancer had ended up being very short. We didn't even reach the point of treatment. I was hoping that as she was getting treatment I wouldn't be able to do the camino as I would have been caring for her. But very, very sadly the cancer was got much bigger very quickly... The only this positive I take from this is that on the day of her death she had been sedated for 2 days before and had just slept... But the day of her death I noticed her breathing getting slow so I sat next to the bed held her hand, she opened her eye and looked right at me, I kissed her head and said "You know we all love you" and she stopped breathing.... Now as an only child, what better way for your best friend to leave this world... and another sad thing is as this was going on my Father has been in hospital and is still there, he knows but I keep thinking that has he truly taken in what has happened.... And today I get the date for her cremation... I almost fell to the floor, it on her birthday 14th June... I plan to walk my camino as planned in September, it was my mother last wish...and I'm going ahead with it.... I just want my camino family when they see me to walk up to me, say nothing and hug me... With this heavy trouble on my shoulder as I walk and reflect on this year I need as many hugs as I can get... Thank you, thank you all xxx Good night mum xxx

Lee--

When I walked Camino Frances in October and November last year, it was very much due to losing my parents, one after the other--within a six-month period. I was an only child in the sense that my only brother died in 1979, and also in the sense that I got no help from my sister. It was a huge, difficult, emotional burden--and I do mean that. I loved my folks very, very much--but dealing with illness, care, death, estates, funerals, etc. is a burden. It just is. It is emotionally taxing to the nth degree.

You will find that it will be a hard time for quite a while. By the time you walk Camino Frances in September, you will be so ready to. It will ease your heart.

I will also add that a Camino "family" is a revolving group of people. You will find many people that you connect with, and likewise, there are people to steer clear from. I wish for you plenty of good, healthy time, and please accept all my most gracious and sincere wishes that you are able to rest easily. You were a great son to your mom. You were there. You were there for her. You were there for her when it was her time to go. What a precious and generous act.

Deb
 
Hello my Camino family, many may remember my other thread titled "Sad". Well mother's battle against cancer had ended up being very short. We didn't even reach the point of treatment. I was hoping that as she was getting treatment I wouldn't be able to do the camino as I would have been caring for her. But very, very sadly the cancer was got much bigger very quickly... The only this positive I take from this is that on the day of her death she had been sedated for 2 days before and had just slept... But the day of her death I noticed her breathing getting slow so I sat next to the bed held her hand, she opened her eye and looked right at me, I kissed her head and said "You know we all love you" and she stopped breathing.... Now as an only child, what better way for your best friend to leave this world... and another sad thing is as this was going on my Father has been in hospital and is still there, he knows but I keep thinking that has he truly taken in what has happened.... And today I get the date for her cremation... I almost fell to the floor, it on her birthday 14th June... I plan to walk my camino as planned in September, it was my mother last wish...and I'm going ahead with it.... I just want my camino family when they see me to walk up to me, say nothing and hug me... With this heavy trouble on my shoulder as I walk and reflect on this year I need as many hugs as I can get... Thank you, thank you all xxx Good night mum xxx

Oh Lee, I am so sorry for your loss. I can read from your words how completely heartbroken you are, line for line and even the spaces in between those lines...such sadness. I am so sorry. Cancer can be slow and cancer can be faster than you can imagine--as you have unfortunately discovered. I'm glad you were there for your mother and were able to fill her soul with the knowledge that you love her--she already knew but needed to hear it from you one more time. Those were beautiful and powerful words for you to give her, especially as the last words she heard (as I imagine they were). You'll remember this and will hopefully be happy one day that you were able to be part of the grace that helped her pass--the knife is too deep right now to think that way yet, I think. I have been in a similar place and know how hard it was for me--horrifically horribly difficult. And terribly lonely. I send my best to you and your father; I hope he is out of the hospital soon and is able to say good-bye to your mother in his own way. Peace to you and big hugs from Canada.
Heather
 
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Hello my Camino family, many may remember my other thread titled "Sad". Well mother's battle against cancer had ended up being very short. We didn't even reach the point of treatment. I was hoping that as she was getting treatment I wouldn't be able to do the camino as I would have been caring for her. But very, very sadly the cancer was got much bigger very quickly... The only this positive I take from this is that on the day of her death she had been sedated for 2 days before and had just slept... But the day of her death I noticed her breathing getting slow so I sat next to the bed held her hand, she opened her eye and looked right at me, I kissed her head and said "You know we all love you" and she stopped breathing.... Now as an only child, what better way for your best friend to leave this world... and another sad thing is as this was going on my Father has been in hospital and is still there, he knows but I keep thinking that has he truly taken in what has happened.... And today I get the date for her cremation... I almost fell to the floor, it on her birthday 14th June... I plan to walk my camino as planned in September, it was my mother last wish...and I'm going ahead with it.... I just want my camino family when they see me to walk up to me, say nothing and hug me... With this heavy trouble on my shoulder as I walk and reflect on this year I need as many hugs as I can get... Thank you, thank you all xxx Good night mum xxx

While I had longer with my mother before the cancer took her, I had a similar special experience with her at the very end. I am an only child too and I will hold on to those precious moments forever. Walking the Camino was not a activity I ever got to speak to my mum about, but I know she will be with me. I start from SJPDP on 8 August.

Buen Camino
 
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Hello, Lee,
Here is that information...I hope walking with and for your Mother helps ease the grip of sorrow around your heart.
Deep well-wishes for you and your Father right now in this very difficult time.
In 2014, I did it again. Only THIS TIME I dedicated the Camino to the memory of my brother, who died in 1991, at age 34. If you speak to the folks at the Pilgrim Office counter about this, you can receive a second, memorial certificate (another variety of Compostela for the deceased if you will). Also, if you carefully read the Cathedral's web site regarding issuing the Compostela, and review any FAQs, it does say that one can ask for and receive a Compostela for a deceased person.

I was happy to be able to share this information with others on the forum. Here is one valid source of information from the Pilgrim Office web site: http://peregrinossantiago.es/eng/pilgrimage/plenary-indulgence/

I want to clarify that there is no "Compostela" for the deceased person, per se. The Pilgrim's Office can produce a separate document with the Catherdral seal, that attests to the pilgrimage made by the live person, in memory and on behalf of the deceased person. This certificate is very attractive and looks similar to a Compostela, but is not actually a Compostela. However for the purpose of memorializing and obtaining a plenary indulgence for a deceased person, it suffices.
 
Thank you, sometimes you feel quite alone and then you hear all your story's and see that well your not alone at all xx
 
The focus is on reducing the risk of failure through being well prepared. 2nd ed.
Hi Lee
"No man is an island. Your loss is also our loss. Any persons death diminishes me
because I am involved in mankind"

Reading your post has brought back the memories of my own mothers death. But like Viranani says,
as time goes by, the rawness gives way to happier memories.

Pax et bonum
 
Thank you, sometimes you feel quite alone and then you hear all your story's and see that well your not alone at all xx
Hi lee, I'm walking right now in memory of my mom, who died almost two months ago. I was lucky to have been able to spend the last ten days of her life with her and my dad. One of the things that gave me a lot of comfort during those days were my three most compassionate forum friends (two of whom have posted on this thread, no surprise there) who were walking the camino during those days and who lit candles and said prayers for my mom. Now I'm doing it for her myself and it is oh so sad. Lots of alone time walking has been good for me. But it's still pretty raw and hard, though the camino is the best place for me now. Wishing you comfort in these tough times. And I'll send you a pm too. Laurie
 
The Camino is a place of healing, and the forum is also. We humans are a family of broken people, the stronger helping the weaker make the miles to the next resting-place, each of us taking his turn in the roles of the injured, the mourner, the strong helper, and eventually even the one mourned.
Even though your heart is broken, know that this is a very holy place and time in your life. The Lord is close to you. A world of comfort and healing is there for you, if you only ask.
 
The focus is on reducing the risk of failure through being well prepared. 2nd ed.
So, so many kind words, thank you all... I an so proud to be a part of this amazing family here... As an only child its so beautiful to now have so, so many brother's and sisters looking out for me.... Thank you
 
Hi Lee
My love and thoughts to both you and your father. Mothers are unique and irreplaceable in our lives.
When I left SJPP on 13 April, my 87 year old mother was struggling with a serious neurological decline that left her with no quality of life ....... but much humiliation. Her heart and other vital signs were strong and we all expected her to be around for quite some time to come. We had agreed that should the worst happen whilst I was walking I would not return for the funeral.
Two days later I n Espinal I received news that she had had a major decline and the future was most uncertain.
Along with my new found Camino family I walked long days, hoping to cover as much ground as possible before her death.
I made it to Castrojeriz. That night most of us had dinner together and dedicated the night to mum.
I wrote her eulogy in my head as I walked the meseta. It was the most perfect place. No need to watch every step, just walk and cry and remember.
From León I went back to Australia for 4 days for the funeral and then I returned to continue walking.
I was 'off the track' for 10 days in all.
When I returned the Camino was a completely different place. I can't really explain or write about it without crying but I can say that I am so very, very grateful for the privilege of so much time to think about my mum and to reflect on all aspects of our 63 years together.
I'm currently in Doha airport on the way home.
Pretty much anything makes me cry (not at all my usual state). I know her death will be so much more real once I am back in Oz.
Lee your Camino will not be the same Camino it was going to be. But, it will be Your Camino.
Take every hug, enjoy every view, savour every taste and smell and just see how it all unfolds.
My heart goes with you
 
St James' Way - Self-guided 4-7 day Walking Packages, Reading to Southampton, 110 kms
Thank you all for the sweet words and such kind wishes and I'm sending each and everyone of you a big hug....
 
Lee, so sorry for your loss. I just lost my own mother quite suddenly in early April so my heart goes out to you.

You, your mom and your family will all be in my prayers.

Jason, I am so sorry for your loss. It shows the type of man you are to put aside your own pain and sorrow to console another person equally in the depths of sadness. Big hugs to you too, my friend.
 
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I'm so sorry for your loss. I know exactly what you're going through as my own parents died just four days apart. It was a very difficult period for my brothers and me, especially since my dad's death was unexpected. But that's a story for another time and I don't want to detract attention from your time of sorrow. May her soul rest in peace.
 
For Lee Woodhouse, Deacon Jason, Peregrina2000 and Jenyat53

Lee, Jason, Laurie, Jen...You are all suffering so much right now and my heart breaks for you all. I am so sorry for the losses you all have endured.

I am getting ready to attend a conference on palliative care. I am a registered massage therapist who has specialized training in oncology massage--I offer comfort-based massage to cancer patients (and other very ill people). In my hunt for information to put on my (exhibitors) table, I found this quote. I think it is fitting for today, for such a time as now. The tsunami of pain will abate at some point. Peace to you all and may your tears of sorrow turn to tears of happy memories in not too distant a future.
Buen Camino.
Peace.

Deep peace of the rising star to you. Deep peace of the flowing air to you. Deep peace of the rolling wave to you. Deep peace of the gentle earth to you. Deep peace of the bright blue sky to you. Deep peace of the gentle breeze to you. Deep peace of the Son of Peace to you. May peace fill your soul and make you whole.
-- Saint Columbia
 
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What wonderful responses. How heartwarming it must be for you to know you already have a Camino family willing to take you into their hearts and support you.
I can add nothing to what has already been written, but you will be carrying your mother with you in your heart as you walk, she will be with you in spirit.
I admit I am a little envious of you, and others too, for having had your mothers for so much of your life. My mother died in 1975; I was a very immature teenager, and I have lived my entire adult life without her, wondering all the might-have-beens, and regretting all sorts of things I would have done differently - had I known then what I've learned as I've grown up. I so wish she could have seen her 4 grandchildren.
But it is what it is, and life is different for each and every one of us.
God bless you Lee, and may your grieving take the form of the smiles of happy memories x
 
Brother's and sister, thank you, thank you... And my knowing I'm not alone in this situation... And knowing too that other's too have lost loved ones... So sad, we will march together and hold each other up.... We have inner strength from all our brother's and sisters here... Thank you x
 
If any of my brother's and sister's here wish to add me to there facebook accounts and see wonderful photo's of my mother your all welcome just use ugleeook@hotmail.com to find me :)
 
St James' Way - Self-guided 4-7 day Walking Packages, Reading to Southampton, 110 kms
Hello my Camino family, many may remember my other thread titled "Sad". Well mother's battle against cancer had ended up being very short. We didn't even reach the point of treatment. I was hoping that as she was getting treatment I wouldn't be able to do the camino as I would have been caring for her. But very, very sadly the cancer was got much bigger very quickly... The only this positive I take from this is that on the day of her death she had been sedated for 2 days before and had just slept... But the day of her death I noticed her breathing getting slow so I sat next to the bed held her hand, she opened her eye and looked right at me, I kissed her head and said "You know we all love you" and she stopped breathing.... Now as an only child, what better way for your best friend to leave this world... and another sad thing is as this was going on my Father has been in hospital and is still there, he knows but I keep thinking that has he truly taken in what has happened.... And today I get the date for her cremation... I almost fell to the floor, it on her birthday 14th June... I plan to walk my camino as planned in September, it was my mother last wish...and I'm going ahead with it.... I just want my camino family when they see me to walk up to me, say nothing and hug me... With this heavy trouble on my shoulder as I walk and reflect on this year I need as many hugs as I can get... Thank you, thank you all xxx Good night mum xxx
Jd


Dear Lee,

I feel so very sorry for you. I've been holding back from responding because it's simply hard to know what to say. But we've lost our parents on both sides now, and even where the health prognosis is poor, it's a shock. So we know how you must be feeling.

Carolyn's mum was poignant. Suffering a gangrenous leg due to poor circulation, she hung on, until her favourite grandchild, our daughter Kye, arrived from a distance, gave Grannie her blessing and told her she was free to go. Kye was the first grandaughter, and they had lost their first child, a girl aged three during the war due to measles and a lack of antibiotics. With her family at the bedside, Carolyn told her how much we all loved her, and she passed on.

Sorry if this is a bit personal and maudlin.

The Camino is a means to an end, and will provide time for solace and reflection. The end for me at least, found in the Cathedral at Santiago, can in so many ways provide comfort and healing.

De Colores,

Bogong
 
Jd


Dear Lee,

I feel so very sorry for you. I've been holding back from responding because it's simply hard to know what to say. But we've lost our parents on both sides now, and even where the health prognosis is poor, it's a shock. So we know how you must be feeling.

Carolyn's mum was poignant. Suffering a gangrenous leg due to poor circulation, she hung on, until her favourite grandchild, our daughter Kye, arrived from a distance, gave Grannie her blessing and told her she was free to go. Kye was the first grandaughter, and they had lost their first child, a girl aged three during the war due to measles and a lack of antibiotics. With her family at the bedside, Carolyn told her how much we all loved her, and she passed on.

Sorry if this is a bit personal and maudlin.

The Camino is a means to an end, and will provide time for solace and reflection. The end for me at least, found in the Cathedral at Santiago, can in so many ways provide comfort and healing.

De Colores,

Bogong

Beautiful words, Bogong. You may have not known what to say, but in the end, what you have said is perfect. I am sorry for the lost of your parents, and, because you have written especially about your wife's mother, that she suffered because of a painful physical condition. I'm glad she was able to let go when she was freed by your daughter, her granddaughter. My condolences to you all. I'm not sure when your wife's mother passed on, or when her father or your own mother and father did, but while the loss of someone may have happened yesterday or twenty years ago, time does not diminish the importance of the person to us, nor the pain of our loss.
 
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The 2024 Camino guides will be coming out little by little. Here is a collection of the ones that are out so far.
My deepest sympathy to you and your father, Lee. The loss of someone who is so loved is hard to bear. The words of all here on this thread give such comfort and as many have said, you are not alone here on the Forum and your Camino in September will surely be a blessed time for you.

Do you have your pebble/pebbles for the Cruz de Ferro? Between now and September/October, when you walk to the Cruz, select one of your pebbles and put your love and gratitude into that pebble for your dear Mum. To have the pebble filled with that love and gratitude stay forever at the Cruz, will be an overwhelmingly wonderful and comforting thing.

Ultreiya, Lee and Buen Camino -

Best wishes -

Jenny
 
Thank you all the kind words, the personal story's form each one of your hearts.... It is just so beautiful, thank you... Yes I have a pebble and in fact I am going to have a glass pennant and don't laugh I found a place that will also make me a glass elephant using the ashes.... My mother lover elephants and this one will not be nelly the elephant I will be Eleanor ;) the elephant so my mother will be carried wit me all the way and will me for ever as will her wedding ring that I have around my neck along with the cross I got off her mother my gran that I wear... xxx
 
Hello my Camino family, many may remember my other thread titled "Sad". Well mother's battle against cancer had ended up being very short. We didn't even reach the point of treatment. I was hoping that as she was getting treatment I wouldn't be able to do the camino as I would have been caring for her. But very, very sadly the cancer was got much bigger very quickly... The only this positive I take from this is that on the day of her death she had been sedated for 2 days before and had just slept... But the day of her death I noticed her breathing getting slow so I sat next to the bed held her hand, she opened her eye and looked right at me, I kissed her head and said "You know we all love you" and she stopped breathing.... Now as an only child, what better way for your best friend to leave this world... and another sad thing is as this was going on my Father has been in hospital and is still there, he knows but I keep thinking that has he truly taken in what has happened.... And today I get the date for her cremation... I almost fell to the floor, it on her birthday 14th June... I plan to walk my camino as planned in September, it was my mother last wish...and I'm going ahead with it.... I just want my camino family when they see me to walk up to me, say nothing and hug me... With this heavy trouble on my shoulder as I walk and reflect on this year I need as many hugs as I can get... Thank you, thank you all xxx Good night mum xxx


Sorry for your loss lee. The Camino is a great healer
 
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Hello my Camino family, many may remember my other thread titled "Sad". Well mother's battle against cancer had ended up being very short. We didn't even reach the point of treatment. I was hoping that as she was getting treatment I wouldn't be able to do the camino as I would have been caring for her. But very, very sadly the cancer was got much bigger very quickly... The only this positive I take from this is that on the day of her death she had been sedated for 2 days before and had just slept... But the day of her death I noticed her breathing getting slow so I sat next to the bed held her hand, she opened her eye and looked right at me, I kissed her head and said "You know we all love you" and she stopped breathing.... Now as an only child, what better way for your best friend to leave this world... and another sad thing is as this was going on my Father has been in hospital and is still there, he knows but I keep thinking that has he truly taken in what has happened.... And today I get the date for her cremation... I almost fell to the floor, it on her birthday 14th June... I plan to walk my camino as planned in September, it was my mother last wish...and I'm going ahead with it.... I just want my camino family when they see me to walk up to me, say nothing and hug me... With this heavy trouble on my shoulder as I walk and reflect on this year I need as many hugs as I can get... Thank you, thank you all xxx Good night mum xxx

Dear Lee - Please accept hearfelt sympathies for your loss... May you experience God's poweful healing, in all its forms, as you walk the wonderful Pyrénées and beyond. Love and joy WILL be on your path - I know, I've been there.
 
Well done, Lee, for opening out to us, your virtual family.... you see what you have done? drawn out memories of pain and love and surviving and living on from others .. such good supporting posts they are.

Lee, you are still in the shock and grief stage but this will pass, pass into something that you may not suspect nor expect - that she hasn't gone, not at all, you will find to your soft surprise that she will be with you until you yourself die. You may find yourself talking to her, wondering what she would think about a decision you are making ...you will see a good parent responding to a child and may flashback to you being that child and your loving and glowing mother, you may feel her presence sometimes ... so .. yes, it is terribly painful right now ... who knew humans could feel such grief, even though it is a normal part of life - but you will see, she hasn't really left you - All is Well.

When the shock and grief has passed you may find that you are a better human than you were - all those who suffer grief and process it properly become so, as it is inevitable that they can then truly empathise when grief affects others and they tend to become kinder. And one day you will look back and realise what a marvellous death that was ... no years of lingering, no terrible pain, and at her last moment in her body her only son, kissing her and looking into her eyes with love.

So walk your Camino Lee, carry your mementos, light candles in ancient churches, carry small flowers and leave them at wayside shrines, with a prayer - do not be afraid to cry, but also, do not be afraid to laugh ... she loved you and loves you still - she wants you to laugh, she wants you to be happy .... Buen Camino Lee xx
 
The focus is on reducing the risk of failure through being well prepared. 2nd ed.
She will that, I plan on having some of her ashes made into a glass pedant spart of her will travel with me xxx
Lee so sorry for your loss. I lost both my parents some years ago. They were cremated and I had some of their ashes encased in a glass sphere which I will take with me. My plan is to release in Finestarre in the ocean. They lived to travel. I am planning on leaving Texas in September for this journey. Don't know if we will meet she will be with you in sprit.
Burn Camino.
 
Sorry for your loss. My mother has been gone for 34 years now - but everyday I feel she is still with me. When I walked the Camino in 2013 I brought along some of my older brother's cremains and my twin brother's cremains so they could "walk" the Camino with me. When I got to Finestere I tossed their ashes into the Ocean. It was a moment of mixed emotions.
 
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I'm sorry for your loss. We lost my father last year to the horrible cancer as well. I feel your pain. Hugs and prayers along with heartfelt sympathies. (Although I will add I am nowhere near close to being an only child, I have 9 siblings! It must be that much harder to go through this without siblings.)
 
Hello my Camino family, many may remember my other thread titled "Sad". Well mother's battle against cancer had ended up being very short. We didn't even reach the point of treatment. I was hoping that as she was getting treatment I wouldn't be able to do the camino as I would have been caring for her. But very, very sadly the cancer was got much bigger very quickly... The only this positive I take from this is that on the day of her death she had been sedated for 2 days before and had just slept... But the day of her death I noticed her breathing getting slow so I sat next to the bed held her hand, she opened her eye and looked right at me, I kissed her head and said "You know we all love you" and she stopped breathing.... Now as an only child, what better way for your best friend to leave this world... and another sad thing is as this was going on my Father has been in hospital and is still there, he knows but I keep thinking that has he truly taken in what has happened.... And today I get the date for her cremation... I almost fell to the floor, it on her birthday 14th June... I plan to walk my camino as planned in September, it was my mother last wish...and I'm going ahead with it.... I just want my camino family when they see me to walk up to me, say nothing and hug me... With this heavy trouble on my shoulder as I walk and reflect on this year I need as many hugs as I can get... Thank you, thank you all xxx Good night mum xxx
So very very sorry for your loss! I am sending love and hugs to you through prayer. I will be about 20 days behind you as I start Sept 16. If you are very slow and I am very fast we could meet up! Buen Camino!
 
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Lee, so very sorry for your loss. I understand -- six years ago I lost my mom and her two sisters within seven weeks of each other. The following year my dad and I walked the Camino in their memory. My dad carried some of my mom’s ashes, and I brought objects I made in honor of the 3 sisters and left them behind at special sites. Walking the Camino was a healing journey for us as it no doubt will be for you. What a beautiful tribute to your mom -- her spirit will be guiding you along the Way! Hugs, Amanda
 
All such lovey story's, you have all touched my heart like you have no idea sharing your special moments, memories thank you xxx
 
All such lovey story's, you have all touched my heart like you have no idea sharing your special moments, memories thank you xxx
Lee...God bless you and your family, now and always. I'm sure your Mum will be with you in spirit, and your Dad will be sending all the positivity you'll need! Buen Camino, brother pilgrim. You've already begun... ((hugs from Spain))
 
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Thank you all the kind words, the personal story's form each one of your hearts.... It is just so beautiful, thank you... Yes I have a pebble and in fact I am going to have a glass pennant and don't laugh I found a place that will also make me a glass elephant using the ashes.... My mother lover elephants and this one will not be nelly the elephant I will be Eleanor ;) the elephant so my mother will be carried wit me all the way and will me for ever as will her wedding ring that I have around my neck along with the cross I got off her mother my gran that I wear... xxx

Lee, my plans put me a few days ahead of you (start Sept 2), but as I read your story and these responses I consider the people sharing the Camino a part of their life journey to be such a real family. How many of us have shed a tear and embraced you from a distance? Your life, and that of of your mom, have enriched our own already.

I trust that in some way we do cross paths along the Way and extend that embrace to the physical. I look forward to hearing your words from the Camino.

Peace and Joy,

Ron
 
God bless you all, you have no idea what all your kind word are doing for me...It's like I have you all here at my side helping me alone this crazy road called life... My mum would be over the moon at all the kind word as she was when I did my last post titled "Sad" I can't thank you all enough... Thank you and Ron when we do meet up the first drink is on me and we'll raise a glass to mum together!!!
 
Hello my Camino family, many may remember my other thread titled "Sad". Well mother's battle against cancer had ended up being very short. We didn't even reach the point of treatment. I was hoping that as she was getting treatment I wouldn't be able to do the camino as I would have been caring for her. But very, very sadly the cancer was got much bigger very quickly... The only this positive I take from this is that on the day of her death she had been sedated for 2 days before and had just slept... But the day of her death I noticed her breathing getting slow so I sat next to the bed held her hand, she opened her eye and looked right at me, I kissed her head and said "You know we all love you" and she stopped breathing.... Now as an only child, what better way for your best friend to leave this world... and another sad thing is as this was going on my Father has been in hospital and is still there, he knows but I keep thinking that has he truly taken in what has happened.... And today I get the date for her cremation... I almost fell to the floor, it on her birthday 14th June... I plan to walk my camino as planned in September, it was my mother last wish...and I'm going ahead with it.... I just want my camino family when they see me to walk up to me, say nothing and hug me... With this heavy trouble on my shoulder as I walk and reflect on this year I need as many hugs as I can get... Thank you, thank you all xxx Good night mum xxx

My condolences to you as you endure this hard time. You will be blessed by having your mom watching and accompany you as you walk your Camino.
 
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If you have followed this thread, please look for me next one titled "Lost for words" my story got so much sadder... Thank you my brother's and sister xxx
 
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Our Atmospheric H30 poncho offers lightness and waterproofness. Easily compressible and made with our Waterproof fabric, its heat-sealed interior seams guarantee its waterproofness. Includes carrying bag.

€60,-
So sorry to hear this, Lee. My deepest sympathies to you and your father. May your mother rest in peace and may you have a blessed Camino. She will be very proud of you and will travel with you in spirit!!
Buen Camino
 
May I offer my sympathy as well , to you and your dad. I'll be starting in sjpp Sept 10, bus to pamplona and then walk to my hospitalEra post in the town of Viana. ...the parochial albergue foe Sept 14 -Sept 30. I will be there with a hug should you drop in enroute. Blessings, love sandi
 
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May I offer my sympathy as well , to you and your dad. I'll be starting in sjpp Sept 10, bus to pamplona and then walk to my hospitalEra post in the town of Viana. ...the parochial albergue foe Sept 14 -Sept 30. I will be there with a hug should you drop in enroute. Blessings, love sandi
Sad to say, dad passed away 13 days after mum too xxx
 
So sorry to hear. I am starting my Camino on September 13 from Ponferrada. We will probably not meet, but I am sending you hugs on your journey.
Have a blessed Camino.
 

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