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Of Camino, My Wife, and Once-In-A-Lifetime Pressures

  • Thread starter Deleted member 67185
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< Just in case there is any wonder about the tone of the post, believe me that it is written with my utmost respect, love, and admiration for my wife. :) >

My wife Jill is not a backpacker, hiker, or camper. She has not done any long-distance, continuous walking as a hobby, sport, or pastime. Jill has never been on a Camino. She has never been to Europe.

Jill is a Newbie. . Yup, the exact category of hopeful individual who we warmly welcome to our Forum, and who seeks help and guidance as they plan for their first Caminos.

Contrary to some of Jill's current anxieties, she is in good cardiovascular shape and regularly works out on the various cardio machines at a nearby gym, as well as doing regular workouts for strength training. Over the last few months, Jill also periodically accompanies me now on day hikes up into the high foothills of our Cascade Mountains.

As Jill and I are quickly approaching our October 15 departure date for Camino Ingles, it has been one heck of an experience to be living under the same roof with a Camino ‘Newbie”.

I very much enjoy providing input and offering help to folks on the Forum, and to answer inquiries for assistance in Private Messages. However, that is something that I can either choose to do, or not. I decide when I want to enter the Forum and leave. I can spend as much or as little time as I feel I want to spend, or which my schedule dictates.

That has changed. Consider, if you will, all of the information sought out by newbies on the Forum; THAT is now part of daily life right here at home. With no time outs.

Jill knows all about my backpacking history, mountaineering history, and of course, my Caminos. Over the years, she has put up with my part-time work of professionally testing backpacking related gear and clothing, sometimes showing extreme patience when I have had piles of stuff from various manufacturers cluttering up tabletops and nooks and crannies.

For the last 6 months at my house, there are no time limits and no boundaries recognized by She Who Must Be Obeyed (SWMBO). In her quest to be ‘adequately’ prepared for Camino Ingles, the sweet, even-tempered, gentle, and easy-going Love of My Life now views me as her personal research and reference Bot. Any hesitation on my part to answering interrogatives is not allowed. Providing remedial ‘wisdom’ and comfort to soothe Jill’s pre-Camino anxieties is on 24-hour call and at-will. . HER will.

Anywhere. Anyplace. Anytime.

It has been an interesting experience to try and multi-task the discussions of the pros and cons of various Camino walking shorts vs running shorts vs zip-offs vs running shorts vs what lengths vs materials vs how many pairs vs . . . while trying to brush my teeth. Or talking about what a base layer is, and which is better . . synthetic vs Merino wool. . . all while sitting on the bathroom throne and talking thru a door. Or being awakened at 2:30 am to discuss concerns about alburgue/dorms, privacy in showers, and options for washing clothes, because SWMBO is unable to sleep worrying about such things.

Jill recently got a little testy when I pleaded ignorance, and drew a line at trying to provide answers to questions about underwear. She did not find it funny when I told her to do what I do, and skip wearing underwear. I think Jill decided that one of the sports shops would be of more help.

Jill’s latest concern is how fast MY pace is while walking, and her ability to keep up with my pace. Over the last week, it seems I have spent a lot of time reinforcing the point that it isn’t about how FAST we walk; it is about how FAR we walk. I try to soothe Jill’s concerns about walking speed by pointing out that we do not have a set time to arrive at our lodging at the end of a day. If there is a specific distance we want to travel, nobody is forcing us to arrive a specific time. No one will fire us if we are late.

If we planned to walk, say, 28 km in the course of a day, we have a choice: we can walk 6 km per hour for 4.6 hours straight. OR we can walk 4 km per hour for 10 hours, with plenty of rests and stops and pauses included.

The ironic thing is, Jill is in better physical shape than I am in right now. Part of that is because she is a decade younger, but also because she has kept up with her fitness levels, too. Her job as a Pediatric charge nurse at our local hospital means that she is used to long periods of time being up on her feet. . . . it is interesting to look at her pedometer readings on her Fitbit, and see that when she is working, she will regularly walk from 6 to 10 miles during a 12-hour shift.

Another facet to this whole adventure with Jill, is that after completing Camino Ingles we will be spending a couple of days in Santiago and then Madrid (visiting the Prado is a must for her).. From there we will be flying to Paris for a couple of days (yup, the Louvre and lots of other stuff to see), and then picking up a rental car for a 14-day European road trip.

Jill views this as her Once-In-A-Lifetime-Trip-To Europe. Absolutely no pressure on me to try not to mess THAT up. One thing I have in my favor is that I lived in Europe at one point, so I have a good sense of things and an even better sense of what I don’t know.

For Jill, this is all new and exotic and mysterious. . . I really didn’t understand how little she knew of Europe until we talked about getting a car rental. For several days Jill kept asking about how comfortable I would be driving ‘over there’. Questions about how ‘safe’ it was for us to drive kept popping up.

One morning as we were driving to a shop, we pulled up to an intersection to make a turn. Jill asked me if I was sure I wouldn’t get mixed up by having to drive on the ‘other’ side of the road. Immediately, the light bulb went on, and I told her that all the countries we will be driving in and through, drive on the same exact side of the road as in the US. She immediately relaxed about the road trip, and now she is all excited about it. With that concern off of her shoulders, it is fun to see her wide-eyed, innocent excitement about experiencing a Camino with me, and being on a 'dream vacation' afterwards.

Anyway, including Spain, Jill will have a nice look at 7 different countries. A nice route through France to Northern Italy, into Switzerland, Lichtenstein, up into German Bavaria, into Austria, then back up to Germany to head to Frankfurt to drop off the car and catch our flight home. We have compiled a list of places to visit and things to see, but other than that, there is no required route to follow, distance we need to meet each day, and decisions about where to spend the night will be made the previous evening, after we look at where we really want to go that next day.

Jill wants to dip her toes into the culture and history and architecture and art of Europe. I'm excited about the foods I get to eat, too.

For Jill, this entire trip is about her fulfilling what she views as her Once-In-A-Lifetime experience. For my part, I have gently suggested that before she concludes that this is a one off, that Camino addiction may pay her a surprise visit. :)
 
The focus is on reducing the risk of failure through being well prepared. 2nd ed.
Wonderful post..so...have you considered sending her here? Because if she wants another opinion there is an endless supply of them here; there are even threads about underwear. ;)

Overseas travel is scary for a first-timer, but once Jill lands in Europe, she'll probably realize that it's just another place and that she's still on terra firma.

Jill’s latest concern is how fast MY pace is while walking, and her ability to keep up with my pace.
One thing to remind her is that you are actually not joined at the hip.
So if one person is slower or not...well, deciding where to meet up along the way once you start to walk for the day can de-pressurize the whole experience. That way if one person is faster, slower, or wants to leave earlier or later, or...whatever...there is a plan.
That way she gets an un-buffered experience, and no-one has to walk the pace of anyone else.
Buen camino to you and Jill both, Dave!
 
< Just in case there is any wonder about the tone of the post, believe me that it is written with my utmost respect, love, and admiration for my wife. :) >

My wife Jill is not a backpacker, hiker, or camper. She has not done any long-distance, continuous walking as a hobby, sport, or pastime. Jill has never been on a Camino. She has never been to Europe.

Jill is a Newbie. . Yup, the exact category of hopeful individual who we warmly welcome to our Forum, and who seeks help and guidance as they plan for their first Caminos.

Contrary to some of Jill's current anxieties, she is in good cardiovascular shape and regularly works out on the various cardio machines at a nearby gym, as well as doing regular workouts for strength training. Over the last few months, Jill also periodically accompanies me now on day hikes up into the high foothills of our Cascade Mountains.

As Jill and I are quickly approaching our October 15 departure date for Camino Ingles, it has been one heck of an experience to be living under the same roof with a Camino ‘Newbie”.

I very much enjoy providing input and offering help to folks on the Forum, and to answer inquiries for assistance in Private Messages. However, that is something that I can either choose to do, or not. I decide when I want to enter the Forum and leave. I can spend as much or as little time as I feel I want to spend, or which my schedule dictates.

That has changed. Consider, if you will, all of the information sought out by newbies on the Forum; THAT is now part of daily life right here at home. With no time outs.

Jill knows all about my backpacking history, mountaineering history, and of course, my Caminos. Over the years, she has put up with my part-time work of professionally testing backpacking related gear and clothing, sometimes showing extreme patience when I have had piles of stuff from various manufacturers cluttering up tabletops and nooks and crannies.

For the last 6 months at my house, there are no time limits and no boundaries recognized by She Who Must Be Obeyed (SWMBO). In her quest to be ‘adequately’ prepared for Camino Ingles, the sweet, even-tempered, gentle, and easy-going Love of My Life now views me as her personal research and reference Bot. Any hesitation on my part to answering interrogatives is not allowed. Providing remedial ‘wisdom’ and comfort to soothe Jill’s pre-Camino anxieties is on 24-hour call and at-will. . HER will.

Anywhere. Anyplace. Anytime.

It has been an interesting experience to try and multi-task the discussions of the pros and cons of various Camino walking shorts vs running shorts vs zip-offs vs running shorts vs what lengths vs materials vs how many pairs vs . . . while trying to brush my teeth. Or talking about what a base layer is, and which is better . . synthetic vs Merino wool. . . all while sitting on the bathroom throne and talking thru a door. Or being awakened at 2:30 am to discuss concerns about alburgue/dorms, privacy in showers, and options for washing clothes, because SWMBO is unable to sleep worrying about such things.

Jill recently got a little testy when I pleaded ignorance, and drew a line at trying to provide answers to questions about underwear. She did not find it funny when I told her to do what I do, and skip wearing underwear. I think Jill decided that one of the sports shops would be of more help.

Jill’s latest concern is how fast MY pace is while walking, and her ability to keep up with my pace. Over the last week, it seems I have spent a lot of time reinforcing the point that it isn’t about how FAST we walk; it is about how FAR we walk. I try to soothe Jill’s concerns about walking speed by pointing out that we do not have a set time to arrive at our lodging at the end of a day. If there is a specific distance we want to travel, nobody is forcing us to arrive a specific time. No one will fire us if we are late.

If we planned to walk, say, 28 km in the course of a day, we have a choice: we can walk 6 km per hour for 4.6 hours straight. OR we can walk 4 km per hour for 10 hours, with plenty of rests and stops and pauses included.

The ironic thing is, Jill is in better physical shape than I am in right now. Part of that is because she is a decade younger, but also because she has kept up with her fitness levels, too. Her job as a Pediatric charge nurse at our local hospital means that she is used to long periods of time being up on her feet. . . . it is interesting to look at her pedometer readings on her Fitbit, and see that when she is working, she will regularly walk from 6 to 10 miles during a 12-hour shift.

Another facet to this whole adventure with Jill, is that after completing Camino Ingles we will be spending a couple of days in Santiago and then Madrid (visiting the Prado is a must for her).. From there we will be flying to Paris for a couple of days (yup, the Louvre and lots of other stuff to see), and then picking up a rental car for a 14-day European road trip.

Jill views this as her Once-In-A-Lifetime-Trip-To Europe. Absolutely no pressure on me to try not to mess THAT up. One thing I have in my favor is that I lived in Europe at one point, so I have a good sense of things and an even better sense of what I don’t know.

For Jill, this is all new and exotic and mysterious. . . I really didn’t understand how little she knew of Europe until we talked about getting a car rental. For several days Jill kept asking about how comfortable I would be driving ‘over there’. Questions about how ‘safe’ it was for us to drive kept popping up.

One morning as we were driving to a shop, we pulled up to an intersection to make a turn. Jill asked me if I was sure I wouldn’t get mixed up by having to drive on the ‘other’ side of the road. Immediately, the light bulb went on, and I told her that all the countries we will be driving in and through, drive on the same exact side of the road as in the US. She immediately relaxed about the road trip, and now she is all excited about it. With that concern off of her shoulders, it is fun to see her wide-eyed, innocent excitement about experiencing a Camino with me, and being on a 'dream vacation' afterwards.

Anyway, including Spain, Jill will have a nice look at 7 different countries. A nice route through France to Northern Italy, into Switzerland, Lichtenstein, up into German Bavaria, into Austria, then back up to Germany to head to Frankfurt to drop off the car and catch our flight home. We have compiled a list of places to visit and things to see, but other than that, there is no required route to follow, distance we need to meet each day, and decisions about where to spend the night will be made the previous evening, after we look at where we really want to go that next day.

Jill wants to dip her toes into the culture and history and architecture and art of Europe. I'm excited about the foods I get to eat, too.

For Jill, this entire trip is about her fulfilling what she views as her Once-In-A-Lifetime experience. For my part, I have gently suggested that before she concludes that this is a one off, that Camino addiction may pay her a surprise visit. :)
@davebugg
This is wonderful news and I'm sure we're all delighted for both of you. As a single woman who has been backpacking, and more recently, camino walking, for many years, I have only two comments to offer. As to women's undergarments, since Jill prefers to wear them, for the amount of camino walking that seems to be planned, she might consider taking comfortable underwear from home. That worked me on a trip to New Zealand a few years ago, when I was only tramping a couple of shorter trails and was not very concerned about drying time for cotton underwear.
The other issue that you mentioned was physical fitness. I think that you are both fortunate if Jill is in better shape than you. You can identity and manage any challenges more easily than Jill might be able to, as a newbie, if she thought that she had to keep up with your pace.
And yes, I know that your post is to invite your friends on the forum to celebrate with you. I wish you both joy in your camino and in your travels in Europe together.
 
Join our full-service guided tour and let us convert you into a Pampered Pilgrim!
< Just in case there is any wonder about the tone of the post, believe me that it is written with my utmost respect, love, and admiration for my wife. :) >

My wife Jill is not a backpacker, hiker, or camper. She has not done any long-distance, continuous walking as a hobby, sport, or pastime. Jill has never been on a Camino. She has never been to Europe.

Jill is a Newbie. . Yup, the exact category of hopeful individual who we warmly welcome to our Forum, and who seeks help and guidance as they plan for their first Caminos.

Contrary to some of Jill's current anxieties, she is in good cardiovascular shape and regularly works out on the various cardio machines at a nearby gym, as well as doing regular workouts for strength training. Over the last few months, Jill also periodically accompanies me now on day hikes up into the high foothills of our Cascade Mountains.

As Jill and I are quickly approaching our October 15 departure date for Camino Ingles, it has been one heck of an experience to be living under the same roof with a Camino ‘Newbie”.

I very much enjoy providing input and offering help to folks on the Forum, and to answer inquiries for assistance in Private Messages. However, that is something that I can either choose to do, or not. I decide when I want to enter the Forum and leave. I can spend as much or as little time as I feel I want to spend, or which my schedule dictates.

That has changed. Consider, if you will, all of the information sought out by newbies on the Forum; THAT is now part of daily life right here at home. With no time outs.

Jill knows all about my backpacking history, mountaineering history, and of course, my Caminos. Over the years, she has put up with my part-time work of professionally testing backpacking related gear and clothing, sometimes showing extreme patience when I have had piles of stuff from various manufacturers cluttering up tabletops and nooks and crannies.

For the last 6 months at my house, there are no time limits and no boundaries recognized by She Who Must Be Obeyed (SWMBO). In her quest to be ‘adequately’ prepared for Camino Ingles, the sweet, even-tempered, gentle, and easy-going Love of My Life now views me as her personal research and reference Bot. Any hesitation on my part to answering interrogatives is not allowed. Providing remedial ‘wisdom’ and comfort to soothe Jill’s pre-Camino anxieties is on 24-hour call and at-will. . HER will.

Anywhere. Anyplace. Anytime.

It has been an interesting experience to try and multi-task the discussions of the pros and cons of various Camino walking shorts vs running shorts vs zip-offs vs running shorts vs what lengths vs materials vs how many pairs vs . . . while trying to brush my teeth. Or talking about what a base layer is, and which is better . . synthetic vs Merino wool. . . all while sitting on the bathroom throne and talking thru a door. Or being awakened at 2:30 am to discuss concerns about alburgue/dorms, privacy in showers, and options for washing clothes, because SWMBO is unable to sleep worrying about such things.

Jill recently got a little testy when I pleaded ignorance, and drew a line at trying to provide answers to questions about underwear. She did not find it funny when I told her to do what I do, and skip wearing underwear. I think Jill decided that one of the sports shops would be of more help.

Jill’s latest concern is how fast MY pace is while walking, and her ability to keep up with my pace. Over the last week, it seems I have spent a lot of time reinforcing the point that it isn’t about how FAST we walk; it is about how FAR we walk. I try to soothe Jill’s concerns about walking speed by pointing out that we do not have a set time to arrive at our lodging at the end of a day. If there is a specific distance we want to travel, nobody is forcing us to arrive a specific time. No one will fire us if we are late.

If we planned to walk, say, 28 km in the course of a day, we have a choice: we can walk 6 km per hour for 4.6 hours straight. OR we can walk 4 km per hour for 10 hours, with plenty of rests and stops and pauses included.

The ironic thing is, Jill is in better physical shape than I am in right now. Part of that is because she is a decade younger, but also because she has kept up with her fitness levels, too. Her job as a Pediatric charge nurse at our local hospital means that she is used to long periods of time being up on her feet. . . . it is interesting to look at her pedometer readings on her Fitbit, and see that when she is working, she will regularly walk from 6 to 10 miles during a 12-hour shift.

Another facet to this whole adventure with Jill, is that after completing Camino Ingles we will be spending a couple of days in Santiago and then Madrid (visiting the Prado is a must for her).. From there we will be flying to Paris for a couple of days (yup, the Louvre and lots of other stuff to see), and then picking up a rental car for a 14-day European road trip.

Jill views this as her Once-In-A-Lifetime-Trip-To Europe. Absolutely no pressure on me to try not to mess THAT up. One thing I have in my favor is that I lived in Europe at one point, so I have a good sense of things and an even better sense of what I don’t know.

For Jill, this is all new and exotic and mysterious. . . I really didn’t understand how little she knew of Europe until we talked about getting a car rental. For several days Jill kept asking about how comfortable I would be driving ‘over there’. Questions about how ‘safe’ it was for us to drive kept popping up.

One morning as we were driving to a shop, we pulled up to an intersection to make a turn. Jill asked me if I was sure I wouldn’t get mixed up by having to drive on the ‘other’ side of the road. Immediately, the light bulb went on, and I told her that all the countries we will be driving in and through, drive on the same exact side of the road as in the US. She immediately relaxed about the road trip, and now she is all excited about it. With that concern off of her shoulders, it is fun to see her wide-eyed, innocent excitement about experiencing a Camino with me, and being on a 'dream vacation' afterwards.

Anyway, including Spain, Jill will have a nice look at 7 different countries. A nice route through France to Northern Italy, into Switzerland, Lichtenstein, up into German Bavaria, into Austria, then back up to Germany to head to Frankfurt to drop off the car and catch our flight home. We have compiled a list of places to visit and things to see, but other than that, there is no required route to follow, distance we need to meet each day, and decisions about where to spend the night will be made the previous evening, after we look at where we really want to go that next day.

Jill wants to dip her toes into the culture and history and architecture and art of Europe. I'm excited about the foods I get to eat, too.

For Jill, this entire trip is about her fulfilling what she views as her Once-In-A-Lifetime experience. For my part, I have gently suggested that before she concludes that this is a one off, that Camino addiction may pay her a surprise visit. :)

I totally second VN’s suggestion that you send Jill to this forum. She doesn’t have to identify herself as “Dave Bugg’s wife” (that would put a lot of pressure on her 😄 ). We are generally a pretty supportive, gentle bunch, and I think that hearing from an anonymous crowd would help calm all of her anxieties. As you well know, there are many scared newbies who let it all out on the forum and then go on to successful un-pre-packaged caminos. Buen camino, Laurie
 
< Just in case there is any wonder about the tone of the post, believe me that it is written with my utmost respect, love, and admiration for my wife. :) >

My wife Jill is not a backpacker, hiker, or camper. She has not done any long-distance, continuous walking as a hobby, sport, or pastime. Jill has never been on a Camino. She has never been to Europe.

Jill is a Newbie. . Yup, the exact category of hopeful individual who we warmly welcome to our Forum, and who seeks help and guidance as they plan for their first Caminos.

Contrary to some of Jill's current anxieties, she is in good cardiovascular shape and regularly works out on the various cardio machines at a nearby gym, as well as doing regular workouts for strength training. Over the last few months, Jill also periodically accompanies me now on day hikes up into the high foothills of our Cascade Mountains.

As Jill and I are quickly approaching our October 15 departure date for Camino Ingles, it has been one heck of an experience to be living under the same roof with a Camino ‘Newbie”.

I very much enjoy providing input and offering help to folks on the Forum, and to answer inquiries for assistance in Private Messages. However, that is something that I can either choose to do, or not. I decide when I want to enter the Forum and leave. I can spend as much or as little time as I feel I want to spend, or which my schedule dictates.

That has changed. Consider, if you will, all of the information sought out by newbies on the Forum; THAT is now part of daily life right here at home. With no time outs.

Jill knows all about my backpacking history, mountaineering history, and of course, my Caminos. Over the years, she has put up with my part-time work of professionally testing backpacking related gear and clothing, sometimes showing extreme patience when I have had piles of stuff from various manufacturers cluttering up tabletops and nooks and crannies.

For the last 6 months at my house, there are no time limits and no boundaries recognized by She Who Must Be Obeyed (SWMBO). In her quest to be ‘adequately’ prepared for Camino Ingles, the sweet, even-tempered, gentle, and easy-going Love of My Life now views me as her personal research and reference Bot. Any hesitation on my part to answering interrogatives is not allowed. Providing remedial ‘wisdom’ and comfort to soothe Jill’s pre-Camino anxieties is on 24-hour call and at-will. . HER will.

Anywhere. Anyplace. Anytime.

It has been an interesting experience to try and multi-task the discussions of the pros and cons of various Camino walking shorts vs running shorts vs zip-offs vs running shorts vs what lengths vs materials vs how many pairs vs . . . while trying to brush my teeth. Or talking about what a base layer is, and which is better . . synthetic vs Merino wool. . . all while sitting on the bathroom throne and talking thru a door. Or being awakened at 2:30 am to discuss concerns about alburgue/dorms, privacy in showers, and options for washing clothes, because SWMBO is unable to sleep worrying about such things.

Jill recently got a little testy when I pleaded ignorance, and drew a line at trying to provide answers to questions about underwear. She did not find it funny when I told her to do what I do, and skip wearing underwear. I think Jill decided that one of the sports shops would be of more help.

Jill’s latest concern is how fast MY pace is while walking, and her ability to keep up with my pace. Over the last week, it seems I have spent a lot of time reinforcing the point that it isn’t about how FAST we walk; it is about how FAR we walk. I try to soothe Jill’s concerns about walking speed by pointing out that we do not have a set time to arrive at our lodging at the end of a day. If there is a specific distance we want to travel, nobody is forcing us to arrive a specific time. No one will fire us if we are late.

If we planned to walk, say, 28 km in the course of a day, we have a choice: we can walk 6 km per hour for 4.6 hours straight. OR we can walk 4 km per hour for 10 hours, with plenty of rests and stops and pauses included.

The ironic thing is, Jill is in better physical shape than I am in right now. Part of that is because she is a decade younger, but also because she has kept up with her fitness levels, too. Her job as a Pediatric charge nurse at our local hospital means that she is used to long periods of time being up on her feet. . . . it is interesting to look at her pedometer readings on her Fitbit, and see that when she is working, she will regularly walk from 6 to 10 miles during a 12-hour shift.

Another facet to this whole adventure with Jill, is that after completing Camino Ingles we will be spending a couple of days in Santiago and then Madrid (visiting the Prado is a must for her).. From there we will be flying to Paris for a couple of days (yup, the Louvre and lots of other stuff to see), and then picking up a rental car for a 14-day European road trip.

Jill views this as her Once-In-A-Lifetime-Trip-To Europe. Absolutely no pressure on me to try not to mess THAT up. One thing I have in my favor is that I lived in Europe at one point, so I have a good sense of things and an even better sense of what I don’t know.

For Jill, this is all new and exotic and mysterious. . . I really didn’t understand how little she knew of Europe until we talked about getting a car rental. For several days Jill kept asking about how comfortable I would be driving ‘over there’. Questions about how ‘safe’ it was for us to drive kept popping up.

One morning as we were driving to a shop, we pulled up to an intersection to make a turn. Jill asked me if I was sure I wouldn’t get mixed up by having to drive on the ‘other’ side of the road. Immediately, the light bulb went on, and I told her that all the countries we will be driving in and through, drive on the same exact side of the road as in the US. She immediately relaxed about the road trip, and now she is all excited about it. With that concern off of her shoulders, it is fun to see her wide-eyed, innocent excitement about experiencing a Camino with me, and being on a 'dream vacation' afterwards.

Anyway, including Spain, Jill will have a nice look at 7 different countries. A nice route through France to Northern Italy, into Switzerland, Lichtenstein, up into German Bavaria, into Austria, then back up to Germany to head to Frankfurt to drop off the car and catch our flight home. We have compiled a list of places to visit and things to see, but other than that, there is no required route to follow, distance we need to meet each day, and decisions about where to spend the night will be made the previous evening, after we look at where we really want to go that next day.

Jill wants to dip her toes into the culture and history and architecture and art of Europe. I'm excited about the foods I get to eat, too.

For Jill, this entire trip is about her fulfilling what she views as her Once-In-A-Lifetime experience. For my part, I have gently suggested that before she concludes that this is a one off, that Camino addiction may pay her a surprise visit. :)
Hey, Dave, log her on this forum. I have new (full) bonus of "negative" points before being banned again to answer "stupid" questions. I'm sure others will help too :D :D :D
 
< Just in case there is any wonder about the tone of the post, believe me that it is written with my utmost respect, love, and admiration for my wife. :) >

My wife Jill is not a backpacker, hiker, or camper. She has not done any long-distance, continuous walking as a hobby, sport, or pastime. Jill has never been on a Camino. She has never been to Europe.

Jill is a Newbie. . Yup, the exact category of hopeful individual who we warmly welcome to our Forum, and who seeks help and guidance as they plan for their first Caminos.

Contrary to some of Jill's current anxieties, she is in good cardiovascular shape and regularly works out on the various cardio machines at a nearby gym, as well as doing regular workouts for strength training. Over the last few months, Jill also periodically accompanies me now on day hikes up into the high foothills of our Cascade Mountains.

As Jill and I are quickly approaching our October 15 departure date for Camino Ingles, it has been one heck of an experience to be living under the same roof with a Camino ‘Newbie”.

I very much enjoy providing input and offering help to folks on the Forum, and to answer inquiries for assistance in Private Messages. However, that is something that I can either choose to do, or not. I decide when I want to enter the Forum and leave. I can spend as much or as little time as I feel I want to spend, or which my schedule dictates.

That has changed. Consider, if you will, all of the information sought out by newbies on the Forum; THAT is now part of daily life right here at home. With no time outs.

Jill knows all about my backpacking history, mountaineering history, and of course, my Caminos. Over the years, she has put up with my part-time work of professionally testing backpacking related gear and clothing, sometimes showing extreme patience when I have had piles of stuff from various manufacturers cluttering up tabletops and nooks and crannies.

For the last 6 months at my house, there are no time limits and no boundaries recognized by She Who Must Be Obeyed (SWMBO). In her quest to be ‘adequately’ prepared for Camino Ingles, the sweet, even-tempered, gentle, and easy-going Love of My Life now views me as her personal research and reference Bot. Any hesitation on my part to answering interrogatives is not allowed. Providing remedial ‘wisdom’ and comfort to soothe Jill’s pre-Camino anxieties is on 24-hour call and at-will. . HER will.

Anywhere. Anyplace. Anytime.

It has been an interesting experience to try and multi-task the discussions of the pros and cons of various Camino walking shorts vs running shorts vs zip-offs vs running shorts vs what lengths vs materials vs how many pairs vs . . . while trying to brush my teeth. Or talking about what a base layer is, and which is better . . synthetic vs Merino wool. . . all while sitting on the bathroom throne and talking thru a door. Or being awakened at 2:30 am to discuss concerns about alburgue/dorms, privacy in showers, and options for washing clothes, because SWMBO is unable to sleep worrying about such things.

Jill recently got a little testy when I pleaded ignorance, and drew a line at trying to provide answers to questions about underwear. She did not find it funny when I told her to do what I do, and skip wearing underwear. I think Jill decided that one of the sports shops would be of more help.

Jill’s latest concern is how fast MY pace is while walking, and her ability to keep up with my pace. Over the last week, it seems I have spent a lot of time reinforcing the point that it isn’t about how FAST we walk; it is about how FAR we walk. I try to soothe Jill’s concerns about walking speed by pointing out that we do not have a set time to arrive at our lodging at the end of a day. If there is a specific distance we want to travel, nobody is forcing us to arrive a specific time. No one will fire us if we are late.

If we planned to walk, say, 28 km in the course of a day, we have a choice: we can walk 6 km per hour for 4.6 hours straight. OR we can walk 4 km per hour for 10 hours, with plenty of rests and stops and pauses included.

The ironic thing is, Jill is in better physical shape than I am in right now. Part of that is because she is a decade younger, but also because she has kept up with her fitness levels, too. Her job as a Pediatric charge nurse at our local hospital means that she is used to long periods of time being up on her feet. . . . it is interesting to look at her pedometer readings on her Fitbit, and see that when she is working, she will regularly walk from 6 to 10 miles during a 12-hour shift.

Another facet to this whole adventure with Jill, is that after completing Camino Ingles we will be spending a couple of days in Santiago and then Madrid (visiting the Prado is a must for her).. From there we will be flying to Paris for a couple of days (yup, the Louvre and lots of other stuff to see), and then picking up a rental car for a 14-day European road trip.

Jill views this as her Once-In-A-Lifetime-Trip-To Europe. Absolutely no pressure on me to try not to mess THAT up. One thing I have in my favor is that I lived in Europe at one point, so I have a good sense of things and an even better sense of what I don’t know.

For Jill, this is all new and exotic and mysterious. . . I really didn’t understand how little she knew of Europe until we talked about getting a car rental. For several days Jill kept asking about how comfortable I would be driving ‘over there’. Questions about how ‘safe’ it was for us to drive kept popping up.

One morning as we were driving to a shop, we pulled up to an intersection to make a turn. Jill asked me if I was sure I wouldn’t get mixed up by having to drive on the ‘other’ side of the road. Immediately, the light bulb went on, and I told her that all the countries we will be driving in and through, drive on the same exact side of the road as in the US. She immediately relaxed about the road trip, and now she is all excited about it. With that concern off of her shoulders, it is fun to see her wide-eyed, innocent excitement about experiencing a Camino with me, and being on a 'dream vacation' afterwards.

Anyway, including Spain, Jill will have a nice look at 7 different countries. A nice route through France to Northern Italy, into Switzerland, Lichtenstein, up into German Bavaria, into Austria, then back up to Germany to head to Frankfurt to drop off the car and catch our flight home. We have compiled a list of places to visit and things to see, but other than that, there is no required route to follow, distance we need to meet each day, and decisions about where to spend the night will be made the previous evening, after we look at where we really want to go that next day.

Jill wants to dip her toes into the culture and history and architecture and art of Europe. I'm excited about the foods I get to eat, too.

For Jill, this entire trip is about her fulfilling what she views as her Once-In-A-Lifetime experience. For my part, I have gently suggested that before she concludes that this is a one off, that Camino addiction may pay her a surprise visit. :)
It would surprise me if Jill has not already peeked in... Your post, as ever, is comprehensive, so now we are all waiting for the during or post camino reports. Buen camino to both and specially to Jill.
 
Down bag (90/10 duvet) of 700 fills with 180 g (6.34 ounces) of filling. Mummy-shaped structure, ideal when you are looking for lightness with great heating performance.

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You can tell your DW (darling wife) that you have a real treat for her when you two travel to Ireland where you could rent a stick shift, right hand steered car and drive on the left side of the lovely fuschia decorated but narrow winding country roads with a large lorry coming at you at full speed. Just suck in your breath and you should pass each other with an inch to spare.... or you could take a bus ! o_O ;);)
 
Hi Dave,

It's always hard to deal with someone who doesn't have the same kind of experiences as you. Things that might seem normal to you are very much out of the ordinary to the other one. Including visiting another continent and -may God help her- dealing with Europeans.

Could it be a good idea to introduce her to this forum so she can communicate with not just other pilgrims but also with people from other countries/cultures? Being born and raised as a European I might be able to put her mind at rest regarding a number of things:
  • We stopped living in caves a number of years ago ;).
  • We learned to behave like human beings and are so good at that, Jill might actually believe that we are just that.
  • We are indeed accustomed to driving on the right (!) side of the road.
  • If Jill forgets to pack something, it might be possible to find a store over here where they sell the desired item (and you're right: who needs underwear anyway).
  • After a long walk we smell the same.
  • We like the taste of water...
  • ... and red wine (when we get thirsty).
 
The one from Galicia (the round) and the one from Castilla & Leon. Individually numbered and made by the same people that make the ones you see on your walk.
Having walked the earth with the love of my life I can only say you are you are very lucky to have your wife to accompany you and while you may feel the pressure of making this the trip of a lifetime for her, perhaps it would help to think of it as just one of many adventures, great and small that you share.

I have found it is the little things that I remember and treasure the most. That quiet breakfast where you say nothing but brush your hands when exchanging sections of the news paper. Those mornings when he'd make me tea in bed and read me crazy bits from the forum. And on the hills when he out walked me, just the casual way he'd lean against a post and peel an orange while he waited for me to puff my way up the incline, before handing me a slice to refresh me and keep me going.

So what if she drives you crazy with questions, you are the expert after all, just wait till she gets a few miles under her belt and realizes that for years now you have been bar hopping across Spain. Have a great trip and give my regards to Goya's pero in the Prada basement.
 
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You are very fortunate that Jill can join you. Enjoy the walk and appreciate that she will have a different experience than you, since everything about this is new to her. You sound like a very patient sort of spouse...bless you for that.
An anecdote: When we were in our early 40's, I took my wife to Europe. Knowing better than to surprise a CPA with a venture like this, I told her several months in advance. It was going to be our (she was sure) OIALT. (Once in a ....). By the time we left, the trip was planned to the second and I was sure it was going to be a disaster. It wasn't. 25 years later, my wife can't walk any long distances any more, but she has been to Europe a dozen times and to Japan a couple of times. Once she got the taste of travel and that "foreign places" were pretty cool, well, that worked out OK. Now, she even lets me go on Caminos regularly without worrying. Bonus for me.
Bonne chance and Bom Caminho.
 
Technical backpack for day trips with backpack cover and internal compartment for the hydration bladder. Ideal daypack for excursions where we need a medium capacity backpack. The back with Air Flow System creates large air channels that will keep our back as cool as possible.

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Buen Camino to Gill, hope as a newbie she loves it as much as I did as a newbie this year. As for the underwear questions, sports bras and microfibre knickers (they dry so much faster and are lighter)! Enjoy.
 
Technical backpack for day trips with backpack cover and internal compartment for the hydration bladder. Ideal daypack for excursions where we need a medium capacity backpack. The back with Air Flow System creates large air channels that will keep our back as cool as possible.

€83,-
As someone who lives in France, which is just one country in in a large landmass that we call Europe, please don't rush through your car trip. You are going to spend long enough in Spain to do a long walk, please remember there is more to France than Paris. At least go for a walk in the country! Or look at some of our ancient churches such as the world heritage site in Saint-Savin (that's the Saint-Savin in the department of the Vienne, not any of the other Saint-Savins in France) or maybe look at one of our seaside towns. There are several pilgrimage routes through France, and yes, Saint-Savin is on one of them. I'll even personally show you round the Abbey. Your route by car sounds great but you will be spending a lot of time driving.
 
As someone who lives in France, which is just one country in in a large landmass that we call Europe, please don't rush through your car trip. You are going to spend long enough in Spain to do a long walk, please remember there is more to France than Paris. At least go for a walk in the country! Or look at some of our ancient churches such as the world heritage site in Saint-Savin (that's the Saint-Savin in the department of the Vienne, not any of the other Saint-Savins in France) or maybe look at one of our seaside towns. There are several pilgrimage routes through France, and yes, Saint-Savin is on one of them. I'll even personally show you round the Abbey. Your route by car sounds great but you will be spending a lot of time driving.
Great idea... my next Camino, planned for 2020, is the Geneva to LePuy walk. Looks quite wonderful, and a chance to experience more of the amazing hospitality we have enjoyed in various Departments outside of Paris over the past 20 years. Merci...
 
For Jill, this entire trip is about her fulfilling what she views as her Once-In-A-Lifetime experience. For my part, I have gently suggested that before she concludes that this is a one off, that Camino addiction may pay her a surprise visit.

I'm always amazed at how a "Once in a lifetime opportunity" can become habit.

Buen Camino!
 
€2,-/day will present your project to thousands of visitors each day. All interested in the Camino de Santiago.
Dave, you are about the most irreplaceable member of this forum for many reasons. I think you are know going to complete the trifecta. You have walked with your son and now your wife. I have been trying to get my kids and or wife to walk with me. My wife has knee issues but otherwise is in great shape. She went from telling me NO WAY will she walk until there are 4 Season Hotels in every village and I can afford to pay for them to know saying we will see, maybe one day I will walk a week with you. Your story gives me hope! As someone else said don't rush through your vacation after the Camino. Just like the Camino less is usually alot more when traveling. Don't even look at this site when you go. Just enjoy this special time with Jill and make lots of great memories.
 
< Just in case there is any wonder about the tone of the post, believe me that it is written with my utmost respect, love, and admiration for my wife. :) >

My wife Jill is not a backpacker, hiker, or camper. She has not done any long-distance, continuous walking as a hobby, sport, or pastime. Jill has never been on a Camino. She has never been to Europe.

Jill is a Newbie. . Yup, the exact category of hopeful individual who we warmly welcome to our Forum, and who seeks help and guidance as they plan for their first Caminos.

Contrary to some of Jill's current anxieties, she is in good cardiovascular shape and regularly works out on the various cardio machines at a nearby gym, as well as doing regular workouts for strength training. Over the last few months, Jill also periodically accompanies me now on day hikes up into the high foothills of our Cascade Mountains.

As Jill and I are quickly approaching our October 15 departure date for Camino Ingles, it has been one heck of an experience to be living under the same roof with a Camino ‘Newbie”.

I very much enjoy providing input and offering help to folks on the Forum, and to answer inquiries for assistance in Private Messages. However, that is something that I can either choose to do, or not. I decide when I want to enter the Forum and leave. I can spend as much or as little time as I feel I want to spend, or which my schedule dictates.

That has changed. Consider, if you will, all of the information sought out by newbies on the Forum; THAT is now part of daily life right here at home. With no time outs.

Jill knows all about my backpacking history, mountaineering history, and of course, my Caminos. Over the years, she has put up with my part-time work of professionally testing backpacking related gear and clothing, sometimes showing extreme patience when I have had piles of stuff from various manufacturers cluttering up tabletops and nooks and crannies.

For the last 6 months at my house, there are no time limits and no boundaries recognized by She Who Must Be Obeyed (SWMBO). In her quest to be ‘adequately’ prepared for Camino Ingles, the sweet, even-tempered, gentle, and easy-going Love of My Life now views me as her personal research and reference Bot. Any hesitation on my part to answering interrogatives is not allowed. Providing remedial ‘wisdom’ and comfort to soothe Jill’s pre-Camino anxieties is on 24-hour call and at-will. . HER will.

Anywhere. Anyplace. Anytime.

It has been an interesting experience to try and multi-task the discussions of the pros and cons of various Camino walking shorts vs running shorts vs zip-offs vs running shorts vs what lengths vs materials vs how many pairs vs . . . while trying to brush my teeth. Or talking about what a base layer is, and which is better . . synthetic vs Merino wool. . . all while sitting on the bathroom throne and talking thru a door. Or being awakened at 2:30 am to discuss concerns about alburgue/dorms, privacy in showers, and options for washing clothes, because SWMBO is unable to sleep worrying about such things.

Jill recently got a little testy when I pleaded ignorance, and drew a line at trying to provide answers to questions about underwear. She did not find it funny when I told her to do what I do, and skip wearing underwear. I think Jill decided that one of the sports shops would be of more help.

Jill’s latest concern is how fast MY pace is while walking, and her ability to keep up with my pace. Over the last week, it seems I have spent a lot of time reinforcing the point that it isn’t about how FAST we walk; it is about how FAR we walk. I try to soothe Jill’s concerns about walking speed by pointing out that we do not have a set time to arrive at our lodging at the end of a day. If there is a specific distance we want to travel, nobody is forcing us to arrive a specific time. No one will fire us if we are late.

If we planned to walk, say, 28 km in the course of a day, we have a choice: we can walk 6 km per hour for 4.6 hours straight. OR we can walk 4 km per hour for 10 hours, with plenty of rests and stops and pauses included.

The ironic thing is, Jill is in better physical shape than I am in right now. Part of that is because she is a decade younger, but also because she has kept up with her fitness levels, too. Her job as a Pediatric charge nurse at our local hospital means that she is used to long periods of time being up on her feet. . . . it is interesting to look at her pedometer readings on her Fitbit, and see that when she is working, she will regularly walk from 6 to 10 miles during a 12-hour shift.

Another facet to this whole adventure with Jill, is that after completing Camino Ingles we will be spending a couple of days in Santiago and then Madrid (visiting the Prado is a must for her).. From there we will be flying to Paris for a couple of days (yup, the Louvre and lots of other stuff to see), and then picking up a rental car for a 14-day European road trip.

Jill views this as her Once-In-A-Lifetime-Trip-To Europe. Absolutely no pressure on me to try not to mess THAT up. One thing I have in my favor is that I lived in Europe at one point, so I have a good sense of things and an even better sense of what I don’t know.

For Jill, this is all new and exotic and mysterious. . . I really didn’t understand how little she knew of Europe until we talked about getting a car rental. For several days Jill kept asking about how comfortable I would be driving ‘over there’. Questions about how ‘safe’ it was for us to drive kept popping up.

One morning as we were driving to a shop, we pulled up to an intersection to make a turn. Jill asked me if I was sure I wouldn’t get mixed up by having to drive on the ‘other’ side of the road. Immediately, the light bulb went on, and I told her that all the countries we will be driving in and through, drive on the same exact side of the road as in the US. She immediately relaxed about the road trip, and now she is all excited about it. With that concern off of her shoulders, it is fun to see her wide-eyed, innocent excitement about experiencing a Camino with me, and being on a 'dream vacation' afterwards.

Anyway, including Spain, Jill will have a nice look at 7 different countries. A nice route through France to Northern Italy, into Switzerland, Lichtenstein, up into German Bavaria, into Austria, then back up to Germany to head to Frankfurt to drop off the car and catch our flight home. We have compiled a list of places to visit and things to see, but other than that, there is no required route to follow, distance we need to meet each day, and decisions about where to spend the night will be made the previous evening, after we look at where we really want to go that next day.

Jill wants to dip her toes into the culture and history and architecture and art of Europe. I'm excited about the foods I get to eat, too.

For Jill, this entire trip is about her fulfilling what she views as her Once-In-A-Lifetime experience. For my part, I have gently suggested that before she concludes that this is a one off, that Camino addiction may pay her a surprise visit. :)
I do hope Jill realizes how amazingly lucky she is to have you to accompany her on her first Camino. I am sure that it is something many of us would love to have happen 😀
 
The 2024 Camino guides will be coming out little by little. Here is a collection of the ones that are out so far.
Very light, comfortable and compressible poncho. Specially designed for protection against water for any activity.

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Providing remedial ‘wisdom’ and comfort to soothe Jill’s pre-Camino anxieties is on 24-hour call and at-will. . HER will.

Anywhere. Anyplace. Anytime.

I laughed so much at this, more than I should, imagining the situations... 😂

How lucky she is that she has the best to help her, Dave. And let her have her Once in a lifetime trip, and then rejoice with the twice in a lifetime, three-times in a lifetime, etc etc, when they eventually happen :)
Every long journey starts with the first step, righ?
 
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Enjoy the trip, Dave and Jill. It will be an adventure for both of you--although probably from a different perspective.
 
Too funny! My husband is my best friend, and he mostly walks my pace while on Camino, bless his heart! I know he would rather walk a brisker pace, but he is a devoted one. The many Caminos we have walked have always been very, very special to us. They have been a way to connect on a different level. Maybe it won't be true for you and Jill, but you never know until you try, and see how it all goes. Walking in silence, together for us, is special indeed. Then walking and yakking until we don't yak anymore is special as well. May your own experience do exactly what you both need for each of you! My best wishes to you both for a fabulous time on Camino and on your trip! 🥰
 
The one from Galicia (the round) and the one from Castilla & Leon. Individually numbered and made by the same people that make the ones you see on your walk.
I totally second VN’s suggestion that you send Jill to this forum. She doesn’t have to identify herself as “Dave Bugg’s wife” (that would put a lot of pressure on her 😄 ). We are generally a pretty supportive, gentle bunch, and I think that hearing from an anonymous crowd would help calm all of her anxieties. As you well know, there are many scared newbies who let it all out on the forum and then go on to successful un-pre-packaged caminos. Buen camino, Laurie

Jill has peeked into the Forum, but she really is averse to social media. :) I've let her know that this Forum is a different animal than most of the free-for-all sites out there, but other than a quick peek, she's just not much of a 'joiner'. :) She does pass on her thank-yous, though. :)
 
It would surprise me if Jill has not already peeked in... Your post, as ever, is comprehensive, so now we are all waiting for the during or post camino reports. Buen camino to both and specially to Jill.

She has, mainly because of my enthusiasm I have about the Forum and some of the great things I have shared with her. I am sure that I will post some observations during the Camino :)
 
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Hi Dave,

It's always hard to deal with someone who doesn't have the same kind of experiences as you. Things that might seem normal to you are very much out of the ordinary to the other one. Including visiting another continent and -may God help her- dealing with Europeans.

Could it be a good idea to introduce her to this forum so she can communicate with not just other pilgrims but also with people from other countries/cultures? Being born and raised as a European I might be able to put her mind at rest regarding a number of things:
  • We stopped living in caves a number of years ago ;).
  • We learned to behave like human beings and are so good at that, Jill might actually believe that we are just that.
  • We are indeed accustomed to driving on the right (!) side of the road.
  • If Jill forgets to pack something, it might be possible to find a store over here where they sell the desired item (and you're right: who needs underwear anyway).
  • After a long walk we smell the same.
  • We like the taste of water...
  • ... and red wine (when we get thirsty).

Thanks for the affirmations, Andre; I will pass these on as reinforcement. :)
 
Having walked the earth with the love of my life I can only say you are you are very lucky to have your wife to accompany you and while you may feel the pressure of making this the trip of a lifetime for her, perhaps it would help to think of it as just one of many adventures, great and small that you share.

I have found it is the little things that I remember and treasure the most. That quiet breakfast where you say nothing but brush your hands when exchanging sections of the news paper. Those mornings when he'd make me tea in bed and read me crazy bits from the forum. And on the hills when he out walked me, just the casual way he'd lean against a post and peel an orange while he waited for me to puff my way up the incline, before handing me a slice to refresh me and keep me going.

So what if she drives you crazy with questions, you are the expert after all, just wait till she gets a few miles under her belt and realizes that for years now you have been bar hopping across Spain. Have a great trip and give my regards to Goya's pero in the Prada basement.

I sure appreciate your insights and thoughts. I hope that my hyperbole didn't make things appear more jaundiced than they really are. :) I loved what you had to say.
 
As someone who lives in France, which is just one country in in a large landmass that we call Europe, please don't rush through your car trip. You are going to spend long enough in Spain to do a long walk, please remember there is more to France than Paris. At least go for a walk in the country! Or look at some of our ancient churches such as the world heritage site in Saint-Savin (that's the Saint-Savin in the department of the Vienne, not any of the other Saint-Savins in France) or maybe look at one of our seaside towns. There are several pilgrimage routes through France, and yes, Saint-Savin is on one of them. I'll even personally show you round the Abbey. Your route by car sounds great but you will be spending a lot of time driving.

I appreciate your thoughts. I agree with your insights, and in addition to our time in Paris, we will be taking our time on our road trip and be visiting most of the regions in France, and enjoying being able to start and stop whenever we want :)
 
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Dave, you are about the most irreplaceable member of this forum for many reasons. I think you are know going to complete the trifecta. You have walked with your son and now your wife. I have been trying to get my kids and or wife to walk with me. My wife has knee issues but otherwise is in great shape. She went from telling me NO WAY will she walk until there are 4 Season Hotels in every village and I can afford to pay for them to know saying we will see, maybe one day I will walk a week with you. Your story gives me hope! As someone else said don't rush through your vacation after the Camino. Just like the Camino less is usually alot more when traveling. Don't even look at this site when you go. Just enjoy this special time with Jill and make lots of great memories.

Thanks for your encouragement, and I am glad if I add to the Forum in a positive way. There are so many great members who make this place such a wonderful resource for all of us, veterans and newbies alike :)

Your and others have provided great advice about not rushing and looking at the post-Camino trip for its quality, rather than quantity.
 
The Beloved first walked with me the SdC, Fisterra, Muxia, SdC triangle. She didn't want to do "that camino thing" but walking in Galicia sounded interesting. We've been back. She does "that Camino thing" now.
@davebugg you'll be fine, so will Jill once you have boots-on-the-ground and a horizon in sight.

Buen camino

Thank you, amigo. I am looking forward to our time together on camino.
 
St James' Way - Self-guided 4-7 day Walking Packages, Reading to Southampton, 110 kms
The focus is on reducing the risk of failure through being well prepared. 2nd ed.
< Just in case there is any wonder about the tone of the post, believe me that it is written with my utmost respect, love, and admiration for my wife. :) >

My wife Jill is not a backpacker, hiker, or camper. She has not done any long-distance, continuous walking as a hobby, sport, or pastime. Jill has never been on a Camino. She has never been to Europe.

Jill is a Newbie. . Yup, the exact category of hopeful individual who we warmly welcome to our Forum, and who seeks help and guidance as they plan for their first Caminos.

Contrary to some of Jill's current anxieties, she is in good cardiovascular shape and regularly works out on the various cardio machines at a nearby gym, as well as doing regular workouts for strength training. Over the last few months, Jill also periodically accompanies me now on day hikes up into the high foothills of our Cascade Mountains.

As Jill and I are quickly approaching our October 15 departure date for Camino Ingles, it has been one heck of an experience to be living under the same roof with a Camino ‘Newbie”.

I very much enjoy providing input and offering help to folks on the Forum, and to answer inquiries for assistance in Private Messages. However, that is something that I can either choose to do, or not. I decide when I want to enter the Forum and leave. I can spend as much or as little time as I feel I want to spend, or which my schedule dictates.

That has changed. Consider, if you will, all of the information sought out by newbies on the Forum; THAT is now part of daily life right here at home. With no time outs.

Jill knows all about my backpacking history, mountaineering history, and of course, my Caminos. Over the years, she has put up with my part-time work of professionally testing backpacking related gear and clothing, sometimes showing extreme patience when I have had piles of stuff from various manufacturers cluttering up tabletops and nooks and crannies.

For the last 6 months at my house, there are no time limits and no boundaries recognized by She Who Must Be Obeyed (SWMBO). In her quest to be ‘adequately’ prepared for Camino Ingles, the sweet, even-tempered, gentle, and easy-going Love of My Life now views me as her personal research and reference Bot. Any hesitation on my part to answering interrogatives is not allowed. Providing remedial ‘wisdom’ and comfort to soothe Jill’s pre-Camino anxieties is on 24-hour call and at-will. . HER will.

Anywhere. Anyplace. Anytime.

It has been an interesting experience to try and multi-task the discussions of the pros and cons of various Camino walking shorts vs running shorts vs zip-offs vs running shorts vs what lengths vs materials vs how many pairs vs . . . while trying to brush my teeth. Or talking about what a base layer is, and which is better . . synthetic vs Merino wool. . . all while sitting on the bathroom throne and talking thru a door. Or being awakened at 2:30 am to discuss concerns about alburgue/dorms, privacy in showers, and options for washing clothes, because SWMBO is unable to sleep worrying about such things.

Jill recently got a little testy when I pleaded ignorance, and drew a line at trying to provide answers to questions about underwear. She did not find it funny when I told her to do what I do, and skip wearing underwear. I think Jill decided that one of the sports shops would be of more help.

Jill’s latest concern is how fast MY pace is while walking, and her ability to keep up with my pace. Over the last week, it seems I have spent a lot of time reinforcing the point that it isn’t about how FAST we walk; it is about how FAR we walk. I try to soothe Jill’s concerns about walking speed by pointing out that we do not have a set time to arrive at our lodging at the end of a day. If there is a specific distance we want to travel, nobody is forcing us to arrive a specific time. No one will fire us if we are late.

If we planned to walk, say, 28 km in the course of a day, we have a choice: we can walk 6 km per hour for 4.6 hours straight. OR we can walk 4 km per hour for 10 hours, with plenty of rests and stops and pauses included.

The ironic thing is, Jill is in better physical shape than I am in right now. Part of that is because she is a decade younger, but also because she has kept up with her fitness levels, too. Her job as a Pediatric charge nurse at our local hospital means that she is used to long periods of time being up on her feet. . . . it is interesting to look at her pedometer readings on her Fitbit, and see that when she is working, she will regularly walk from 6 to 10 miles during a 12-hour shift.

Another facet to this whole adventure with Jill, is that after completing Camino Ingles we will be spending a couple of days in Santiago and then Madrid (visiting the Prado is a must for her).. From there we will be flying to Paris for a couple of days (yup, the Louvre and lots of other stuff to see), and then picking up a rental car for a 14-day European road trip.

Jill views this as her Once-In-A-Lifetime-Trip-To Europe. Absolutely no pressure on me to try not to mess THAT up. One thing I have in my favor is that I lived in Europe at one point, so I have a good sense of things and an even better sense of what I don’t know.

For Jill, this is all new and exotic and mysterious. . . I really didn’t understand how little she knew of Europe until we talked about getting a car rental. For several days Jill kept asking about how comfortable I would be driving ‘over there’. Questions about how ‘safe’ it was for us to drive kept popping up.

One morning as we were driving to a shop, we pulled up to an intersection to make a turn. Jill asked me if I was sure I wouldn’t get mixed up by having to drive on the ‘other’ side of the road. Immediately, the light bulb went on, and I told her that all the countries we will be driving in and through, drive on the same exact side of the road as in the US. She immediately relaxed about the road trip, and now she is all excited about it. With that concern off of her shoulders, it is fun to see her wide-eyed, innocent excitement about experiencing a Camino with me, and being on a 'dream vacation' afterwards.

Anyway, including Spain, Jill will have a nice look at 7 different countries. A nice route through France to Northern Italy, into Switzerland, Lichtenstein, up into German Bavaria, into Austria, then back up to Germany to head to Frankfurt to drop off the car and catch our flight home. We have compiled a list of places to visit and things to see, but other than that, there is no required route to follow, distance we need to meet each day, and decisions about where to spend the night will be made the previous evening, after we look at where we really want to go that next day.

Jill wants to dip her toes into the culture and history and architecture and art of Europe. I'm excited about the foods I get to eat, too.

For Jill, this entire trip is about her fulfilling what she views as her Once-In-A-Lifetime experience. For my part, I have gently suggested that before she concludes that this is a one off, that Camino addiction may pay her a surprise visit. :)
I understand what you mean about getting the caminos bug. I am 69 y/o and plan on doing the camino for the 4th and last time next year before I turn 70 y/o.
Remind Jill that while there is no right way to do the camino, there is no wrong way.
I suggest that each of you walk alone at least one day.
Also, I suggest that you slow down and get a real feel for the experience.
I am always the slowest Walker on the camino. Some times people slow down and walk with me for a mile or two. Sometimes the biggest blessing I experienced for a day was a stray comment which really resinated with me at that moment.
Challenge yourself to find out what makes the camino special and different from a long walk.
Buen Camino!
 
I'm always amazed at how a "Once in a lifetime opportunity" can become habit.

Buen Camino!
I thought my first Camino (Leon to Santiago) in 2011 was a one-time-only trip. Along the way, I met someone who was walking it for the second time - WHY?? He’s already ‘seen’ it once...why return??? Well, that was May and I was back in October to walk the parts I missed in May...and I haven’t stopped walking yet.
 
< Just in case there is any wonder about the tone of the post, believe me that it is written with my utmost respect, love, and admiration for my wife. :) >

My wife Jill is not a backpacker, hiker, or camper. She has not done any long-distance, continuous walking as a hobby, sport, or pastime. Jill has never been on a Camino. She has never been to Europe.

Jill is a Newbie. . Yup, the exact category of hopeful individual who we warmly welcome to our Forum, and who seeks help and guidance as they plan for their first Caminos.

Contrary to some of Jill's current anxieties, she is in good cardiovascular shape and regularly works out on the various cardio machines at a nearby gym, as well as doing regular workouts for strength training. Over the last few months, Jill also periodically accompanies me now on day hikes up into the high foothills of our Cascade Mountains.

As Jill and I are quickly approaching our October 15 departure date for Camino Ingles, it has been one heck of an experience to be living under the same roof with a Camino ‘Newbie”.

I very much enjoy providing input and offering help to folks on the Forum, and to answer inquiries for assistance in Private Messages. However, that is something that I can either choose to do, or not. I decide when I want to enter the Forum and leave. I can spend as much or as little time as I feel I want to spend, or which my schedule dictates.

That has changed. Consider, if you will, all of the information sought out by newbies on the Forum; THAT is now part of daily life right here at home. With no time outs.

Jill knows all about my backpacking history, mountaineering history, and of course, my Caminos. Over the years, she has put up with my part-time work of professionally testing backpacking related gear and clothing, sometimes showing extreme patience when I have had piles of stuff from various manufacturers cluttering up tabletops and nooks and crannies.

For the last 6 months at my house, there are no time limits and no boundaries recognized by She Who Must Be Obeyed (SWMBO). In her quest to be ‘adequately’ prepared for Camino Ingles, the sweet, even-tempered, gentle, and easy-going Love of My Life now views me as her personal research and reference Bot. Any hesitation on my part to answering interrogatives is not allowed. Providing remedial ‘wisdom’ and comfort to soothe Jill’s pre-Camino anxieties is on 24-hour call and at-will. . HER will.

Anywhere. Anyplace. Anytime.

It has been an interesting experience to try and multi-task the discussions of the pros and cons of various Camino walking shorts vs running shorts vs zip-offs vs running shorts vs what lengths vs materials vs how many pairs vs . . . while trying to brush my teeth. Or talking about what a base layer is, and which is better . . synthetic vs Merino wool. . . all while sitting on the bathroom throne and talking thru a door. Or being awakened at 2:30 am to discuss concerns about alburgue/dorms, privacy in showers, and options for washing clothes, because SWMBO is unable to sleep worrying about such things.

Jill recently got a little testy when I pleaded ignorance, and drew a line at trying to provide answers to questions about underwear. She did not find it funny when I told her to do what I do, and skip wearing underwear. I think Jill decided that one of the sports shops would be of more help.

Jill’s latest concern is how fast MY pace is while walking, and her ability to keep up with my pace. Over the last week, it seems I have spent a lot of time reinforcing the point that it isn’t about how FAST we walk; it is about how FAR we walk. I try to soothe Jill’s concerns about walking speed by pointing out that we do not have a set time to arrive at our lodging at the end of a day. If there is a specific distance we want to travel, nobody is forcing us to arrive a specific time. No one will fire us if we are late.

If we planned to walk, say, 28 km in the course of a day, we have a choice: we can walk 6 km per hour for 4.6 hours straight. OR we can walk 4 km per hour for 10 hours, with plenty of rests and stops and pauses included.

The ironic thing is, Jill is in better physical shape than I am in right now. Part of that is because she is a decade younger, but also because she has kept up with her fitness levels, too. Her job as a Pediatric charge nurse at our local hospital means that she is used to long periods of time being up on her feet. . . . it is interesting to look at her pedometer readings on her Fitbit, and see that when she is working, she will regularly walk from 6 to 10 miles during a 12-hour shift.

Another facet to this whole adventure with Jill, is that after completing Camino Ingles we will be spending a couple of days in Santiago and then Madrid (visiting the Prado is a must for her).. From there we will be flying to Paris for a couple of days (yup, the Louvre and lots of other stuff to see), and then picking up a rental car for a 14-day European road trip.

Jill views this as her Once-In-A-Lifetime-Trip-To Europe. Absolutely no pressure on me to try not to mess THAT up. One thing I have in my favor is that I lived in Europe at one point, so I have a good sense of things and an even better sense of what I don’t know.

For Jill, this is all new and exotic and mysterious. . . I really didn’t understand how little she knew of Europe until we talked about getting a car rental. For several days Jill kept asking about how comfortable I would be driving ‘over there’. Questions about how ‘safe’ it was for us to drive kept popping up.

One morning as we were driving to a shop, we pulled up to an intersection to make a turn. Jill asked me if I was sure I wouldn’t get mixed up by having to drive on the ‘other’ side of the road. Immediately, the light bulb went on, and I told her that all the countries we will be driving in and through, drive on the same exact side of the road as in the US. She immediately relaxed about the road trip, and now she is all excited about it. With that concern off of her shoulders, it is fun to see her wide-eyed, innocent excitement about experiencing a Camino with me, and being on a 'dream vacation' afterwards.

Anyway, including Spain, Jill will have a nice look at 7 different countries. A nice route through France to Northern Italy, into Switzerland, Lichtenstein, up into German Bavaria, into Austria, then back up to Germany to head to Frankfurt to drop off the car and catch our flight home. We have compiled a list of places to visit and things to see, but other than that, there is no required route to follow, distance we need to meet each day, and decisions about where to spend the night will be made the previous evening, after we look at where we really want to go that next day.

Jill wants to dip her toes into the culture and history and architecture and art of Europe. I'm excited about the foods I get to eat, too.

For Jill, this entire trip is about her fulfilling what she views as her Once-In-A-Lifetime experience. For my part, I have gently suggested that before she concludes that this is a one off, that Camino addiction may pay her a surprise visit. :)
I agree with all those who suggest you get Jill to log in here. There are many women who can help with those personal questions that a man won't be able to help with (EVEN you....no discrimination here:) ). I was in your wife's position several years ago; with the exception that I had travelled twice to Europe with my husband previously. My wonderful spouse planned the Camino experience (his third) totally with me in mind....shorter day distances, he carried my sleeping bag because I'm not big enough to carry a whole lot. It was great...but yes, there were times that he just went on ahead and I walked with others, or with myself. A little personal space is a good thing. The other thing is that Jill, on this trip, will also have to contend with all of the "differences" of Europe. Like what to call the coffee that you want when in different countries, different bed sizes, etc. etc. That can be stressful in and of itself. Beginning to talk about how some things will be different (not BAD, just different) may help with the mindset. When you said that Jill is a Pediatric Charge Nurse, the bell in my head went "ding". Of course. She has spent her entire life being hyper concerned with details, because usually a child's life might depend upon it. So that's how she approaches everything, which explains why you are getting so tired. You, who have so much experience with Caminos, and simply being in the present. Perhaps a bit of "you" time is a good prescription also to keep everyone happy and enjoying the trip. It really does sound marvelous, and I am jealous!!! Like I said, there are lots of us women who are happy to chat ad nauseum about anything Jill is concerned about. There are also several good books (non-fiction) available on Amazon about couples who do the Camino together - I've read most of them, and I think that one of those might be helpful just in reassuring Jill that couples that have different personalities, different missions in life, DO go together on the Camino....and they DO make it and enjoy though not every day is bliss. Buen Camino you two!!
 
Ideal sleeping bag liner whether we want to add a thermal plus to our bag, or if we want to use it alone to sleep in shelters or hostels. Thanks to its mummy shape, it adapts perfectly to our body.

€46,-
< Just in case there is any wonder about the tone of the post, believe me that it is written with my utmost respect, love, and admiration for my wife. :) >

My wife Jill is not a backpacker, hiker, or camper. She has not done any long-distance, continuous walking as a hobby, sport, or pastime. Jill has never been on a Camino. She has never been to Europe.

Jill is a Newbie. . Yup, the exact category of hopeful individual who we warmly welcome to our Forum, and who seeks help and guidance as they plan for their first Caminos.

Contrary to some of Jill's current anxieties, she is in good cardiovascular shape and regularly works out on the various cardio machines at a nearby gym, as well as doing regular workouts for strength training. Over the last few months, Jill also periodically accompanies me now on day hikes up into the high foothills of our Cascade Mountains.

As Jill and I are quickly approaching our October 15 departure date for Camino Ingles, it has been one heck of an experience to be living under the same roof with a Camino ‘Newbie”.

I very much enjoy providing input and offering help to folks on the Forum, and to answer inquiries for assistance in Private Messages. However, that is something that I can either choose to do, or not. I decide when I want to enter the Forum and leave. I can spend as much or as little time as I feel I want to spend, or which my schedule dictates.

That has changed. Consider, if you will, all of the information sought out by newbies on the Forum; THAT is now part of daily life right here at home. With no time outs.

Jill knows all about my backpacking history, mountaineering history, and of course, my Caminos. Over the years, she has put up with my part-time work of professionally testing backpacking related gear and clothing, sometimes showing extreme patience when I have had piles of stuff from various manufacturers cluttering up tabletops and nooks and crannies.

For the last 6 months at my house, there are no time limits and no boundaries recognized by She Who Must Be Obeyed (SWMBO). In her quest to be ‘adequately’ prepared for Camino Ingles, the sweet, even-tempered, gentle, and easy-going Love of My Life now views me as her personal research and reference Bot. Any hesitation on my part to answering interrogatives is not allowed. Providing remedial ‘wisdom’ and comfort to soothe Jill’s pre-Camino anxieties is on 24-hour call and at-will. . HER will.

Anywhere. Anyplace. Anytime.

It has been an interesting experience to try and multi-task the discussions of the pros and cons of various Camino walking shorts vs running shorts vs zip-offs vs running shorts vs what lengths vs materials vs how many pairs vs . . . while trying to brush my teeth. Or talking about what a base layer is, and which is better . . synthetic vs Merino wool. . . all while sitting on the bathroom throne and talking thru a door. Or being awakened at 2:30 am to discuss concerns about alburgue/dorms, privacy in showers, and options for washing clothes, because SWMBO is unable to sleep worrying about such things.

Jill recently got a little testy when I pleaded ignorance, and drew a line at trying to provide answers to questions about underwear. She did not find it funny when I told her to do what I do, and skip wearing underwear. I think Jill decided that one of the sports shops would be of more help.

Jill’s latest concern is how fast MY pace is while walking, and her ability to keep up with my pace. Over the last week, it seems I have spent a lot of time reinforcing the point that it isn’t about how FAST we walk; it is about how FAR we walk. I try to soothe Jill’s concerns about walking speed by pointing out that we do not have a set time to arrive at our lodging at the end of a day. If there is a specific distance we want to travel, nobody is forcing us to arrive a specific time. No one will fire us if we are late.

If we planned to walk, say, 28 km in the course of a day, we have a choice: we can walk 6 km per hour for 4.6 hours straight. OR we can walk 4 km per hour for 10 hours, with plenty of rests and stops and pauses included.

The ironic thing is, Jill is in better physical shape than I am in right now. Part of that is because she is a decade younger, but also because she has kept up with her fitness levels, too. Her job as a Pediatric charge nurse at our local hospital means that she is used to long periods of time being up on her feet. . . . it is interesting to look at her pedometer readings on her Fitbit, and see that when she is working, she will regularly walk from 6 to 10 miles during a 12-hour shift.

Another facet to this whole adventure with Jill, is that after completing Camino Ingles we will be spending a couple of days in Santiago and then Madrid (visiting the Prado is a must for her).. From there we will be flying to Paris for a couple of days (yup, the Louvre and lots of other stuff to see), and then picking up a rental car for a 14-day European road trip.

Jill views this as her Once-In-A-Lifetime-Trip-To Europe. Absolutely no pressure on me to try not to mess THAT up. One thing I have in my favor is that I lived in Europe at one point, so I have a good sense of things and an even better sense of what I don’t know.

For Jill, this is all new and exotic and mysterious. . . I really didn’t understand how little she knew of Europe until we talked about getting a car rental. For several days Jill kept asking about how comfortable I would be driving ‘over there’. Questions about how ‘safe’ it was for us to drive kept popping up.

One morning as we were driving to a shop, we pulled up to an intersection to make a turn. Jill asked me if I was sure I wouldn’t get mixed up by having to drive on the ‘other’ side of the road. Immediately, the light bulb went on, and I told her that all the countries we will be driving in and through, drive on the same exact side of the road as in the US. She immediately relaxed about the road trip, and now she is all excited about it. With that concern off of her shoulders, it is fun to see her wide-eyed, innocent excitement about experiencing a Camino with me, and being on a 'dream vacation' afterwards.

Anyway, including Spain, Jill will have a nice look at 7 different countries. A nice route through France to Northern Italy, into Switzerland, Lichtenstein, up into German Bavaria, into Austria, then back up to Germany to head to Frankfurt to drop off the car and catch our flight home. We have compiled a list of places to visit and things to see, but other than that, there is no required route to follow, distance we need to meet each day, and decisions about where to spend the night will be made the previous evening, after we look at where we really want to go that next day.

Jill wants to dip her toes into the culture and history and architecture and art of Europe. I'm excited about the foods I get to eat, too.

For Jill, this entire trip is about her fulfilling what she views as her Once-In-A-Lifetime experience. For my part, I have gently suggested that before she concludes that this is a one off, that Camino addiction may pay her a surprise visit. :)
Buen Camino! You both will have such a wonderful time!
 
1) Jill may value Sybille Yate’s book - Pilgrim Tips & Packing List

2) Walking with my beloved has become the most special & precious experience, that I wouldn’t be without, and will value for the rest my life. However, note, we had our challenges in the early days, adjusting our individual styles, patterns & preferences in camino walking & living, in order to discover ways to be harmoniously, joyfully & peacefully with each other through the days and nights of being together.

Buen Camino!
 
Ideal sleeping bag liner whether we want to add a thermal plus to our bag, or if we want to use it alone to sleep in shelters or hostels. Thanks to its mummy shape, it adapts perfectly to our body.

€46,-
Oh @davebugg :eek:
I thought I was alone in this madness. I felt I was reading about my wife Pat :rolleyes:
I hate to say this..........but you may just be going through the 'warm up'.........
Wait till you actually hit the Camino..... :):):)

Hopefully I will have a few (smooth and quiet) years until my wife will develop the idea to accompany me on a long hike or a camino.
She did say she will fly if she turns 50, so after this coming January she will have no excuse ;)
She is a non-hiker, non-camper, non-outdoorer. For her it will be a small challenge.
And for me a huge challenge :D.

Have fun!
 
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