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Search 69,459 Camino Questions

Thinking about walking again

KSM

Member
Time of past OR future Camino
walked camino France's April/may 2015!!!!!
Tickets booked..... Backpack almost ready ...... Training ongoing .....mental state: beyond excited! ...... Leaving to complete el camino frances april 22nd!!!
Hi,
Help! My head is all over the place!
The Camino has always been in my thoughts, but recently I just can't stop thinking about it. I'm on forums talking about it, and seeing people doing it now.
It's hard not to want to be there doing it again.
I think about doing it in September, this year. I would love my husband to do it with me, but he finds it difficult to just up and go from his job.
The are a few factors that are "stopping" me.
My husband and i are talking about doing a big move. From Canada to England. It was always on the cards....as I was born and bred in England. He is from Canada, but has family in Spain and just loves Spain as much as I do.... well maybe not as much, but almost! Haha
We have been talking about moving for about a year and a half, but he has only just (January) seriously started looking for a job. He is trying...but I feel he is also dragging his feet a little.
For him he needs the security of a job before he moves, whereas I would just jump on a plane today. I'm being patient, trying to compromise, but I struggle to believe we'll be leaving before September. And it's like I need a back up plan.
Ideally, I'd love him to quit his job, we go walk the Camino, and then arrive in England and look for a job. We're definitely not rich, but we do have a bit of savings, that could facilitate this easily. (And that's before the sale of our house, which were initially just thinking to rent out.)
I am almost certain he wouldn't go for this idea....although I have been nervous to talk to him about it. He struggles with my spontaneous side and sometimes doesn't understand me. One minute I want to do 'this' and the next 'that'.... which is a little bit true.... but I also can work hard for things. I don't expect everything to happen right away, or land on my lap. I just have lots of goals.
I'm just eager to get moving, to do something meaningful again. Is it fair to ask him to do the walk in September with me? Or is it fair to say I want to go do it with or without him, in September, if we haven't moved by then?
I have been itching to go back for a while, but I knew for myself I needed to put some time between my last trip and the next one, to be able to go without the expectations of recreating the same trip. I'm ready. I'm itching to go....
how have those of you in relationships dealt with your loved ones?
Any advice from those that understand the pull of the Camino, and especially of those, with partners that have struggled in the other leaving.... is greatly appreciated!
 
A selection of Camino Jewellery
Hi,
Help! My head is all over the place!
The Camino has always been in my thoughts, but recently I just can't stop thinking about it. I'm on forums talking about it, and seeing people doing it now.
It's hard not to want to be there doing it again.
I think about doing it in September, this year. I would love my husband to do it with me, but he finds it difficult to just up and go from his job.
The are a few factors that are "stopping" me.
My husband and i are talking about doing a big move. From Canada to England. It was always on the cards....as I was born and bred in England. He is from Canada, but has family in Spain and just loves Spain as much as I do.... well maybe not as much, but almost! Haha
We have been talking about moving for about a year and a half, but he has only just (January) seriously started looking for a job. He is trying...but I feel he is also dragging his feet a little.
For him he needs the security of a job before he moves, whereas I would just jump on a plane today. I'm being patient, trying to compromise, but I struggle to believe we'll be leaving before September. And it's like I need a back up plan.
Ideally, I'd love him to quit his job, we go walk the Camino, and then arrive in England and look for a job. We're definitely not rich, but we do have a bit of savings, that could facilitate this easily. (And that's before the sale of our house, which were initially just thinking to rent out.)
I am almost certain he wouldn't go for this idea....although I have been nervous to talk to him about it. He struggles with my spontaneous side and sometimes doesn't understand me. One minute I want to do 'this' and the next 'that'.... which is a little bit true.... but I also can work hard for things. I don't expect everything to happen right away, or land on my lap. I just have lots of goals.
I'm just eager to get moving, to do something meaningful again. Is it fair to ask him to do the walk in September with me? Or is it fair to say I want to go do it with or without him, in September, if we haven't moved by then?
I have been itching to go back for a while, but I knew for myself I needed to put some time between my last trip and the next one, to be able to go without the expectations of recreating the same trip. I'm ready. I'm itching to go....
how have those of you in relationships dealt with your loved ones?
Any advice from those that understand the pull of the Camino, and especially of those, with partners that have struggled in the other leaving.... is greatly appreciated!
You have definitely got the 'bug'Caminoitis,for which there is only one cure....walk again,but I can understand your husband's need for the security of a job.I was a young married man with a family when I first became aware of the Camino,but apart from no one understanding my desire to walk the Camino ,I knew work and family commitments came first.I reached a point in life later where I knew that I would have to put off my Camino UNTIL I retired.The Camino was everything I had hoped for ,and my birthday present to myself for my 70th is to walk again from Burgos in August ,but deep down I wish I had started as a younger man and could have walked even more often.Havng said that ,no one still understands my love of the Camino.I wish you all the best for your future,and Buen Camino when you walk again.
 
You have definitely got the 'bug'Caminoitis,for which there is only one cure....walk again,but I can understand your husband's need for the security of a job.I was a young married man with a family when I first became aware of the Camino,but apart from no one understanding my desire to walk the Camino ,I knew work and family commitments came first.I reached a point in life later where I knew that I would have to put off my Camino UNTIL I retired.The Camino was everything I had hoped for ,and my birthday present to myself for my 70th is to walk again from Burgos in August ,but deep down I wish I had started as a younger man and could have walked even more often.Havng said that ,no one still understands my love of the Camino.I wish you all the best for your future,and Buen Camino when you walk again.
Thank you for your response!
It's hard to find a balance between this things we need to do for family versus' ourselves... fortunately I don't have any children to think of right now... but wondering if I should give more hope to the moving things and postpone the Camino to another time. It's difficult. My husband never usually stops me from doing what I want... but I do feel guilty sometimes. And I don't want to overload him, when he is trying to find a job.
I wish you look on your next Camino! How many times now? This will be your second? Amazing!
On my Camino ... there was a 75 year old lady that was walking with her 40 something daughter. I saw her day after day for about a week... she kept up with my pace! Kind of put me to shame being 35.... or maybe it's inspiration for my older years!
Thanks again!
Buen camino!
 
The focus is on reducing the risk of failure through being well prepared. 2nd ed.
Thank you for your response!
It's hard to find a balance between this things we need to do for family versus' ourselves... fortunately I don't have any children to think of right now... but wondering if I should give more hope to the moving things and postpone the Camino to another time. It's difficult. My husband never usually stops me from doing what I want... but I do feel guilty sometimes. And I don't want to overload him, when he is trying to find a job.
I wish you look on your next Camino! How many times now? This will be your second? Amazing!
On my Camino ... there was a 75 year old lady that was walking with her 40 something daughter. I saw her day after day for about a week... she kept up with my pace! Kind of put me to shame being 35.... or maybe it's inspiration for my older years!
Thanks again!
Buen camino!
Sorry this will be my fourth,but I feel as exited as if it was my first.I actually wanted to celebrate my birthday on the Camino, but my family thought this "a step too far" so I fly to Spain 2 days later (to allow for the after party hangover).
 
Hi @KSM - this is really tough, not an easy decision to make. It's a strange thing, the way the camino experience seem to be able to really get under the skin of some of us who participate in it, like very few other things, and yet many of us (me included) struggle to be able to articulate why that is, to those around us and closest to us at home. Personally, for me the camino was a fantastic experience (which I did alone) and my wife totally doesn't get it, at all. I think we're at the point now where I can probably go back at some stage in the next 1-2 years, but we will see how life progresses. We have lots of other competting things to balance, which offer their own rewards. In terms of advice on your dilemma, I suppose all I can say is that relationships are full of compromise, and only you and your husband can figure out what the right thing to do is... Talk to each other, see where it goes. I guess that in many respects life is like the camino - you don't always get what you want when you want it, but sometimes it turns out to be what you need. Stay positive, keep the faith - you'll get where you need to go.

Buen Camino!
 
Ideal pocket guides for during & after your Camino. Each weighs only 1.4 oz (40g)!
Hi,
Help! My head is all over the place!
The Camino has always been in my thoughts, but recently I just can't stop thinking about it. I'm on forums talking about it, and seeing people doing it now.
It's hard not to want to be there doing it again.
I think about doing it in September, this year. I would love my husband to do it with me, but he finds it difficult to just up and go from his job.
The are a few factors that are "stopping" me.
My husband and i are talking about doing a big move. From Canada to England. It was always on the cards....as I was born and bred in England. He is from Canada, but has family in Spain and just loves Spain as much as I do.... well maybe not as much, but almost! Haha
We have been talking about moving for about a year and a half, but he has only just (January) seriously started looking for a job. He is trying...but I feel he is also dragging his feet a little.
For him he needs the security of a job before he moves, whereas I would just jump on a plane today. I'm being patient, trying to compromise, but I struggle to believe we'll be leaving before September. And it's like I need a back up plan.
Ideally, I'd love him to quit his job, we go walk the Camino, and then arrive in England and look for a job. We're definitely not rich, but we do have a bit of savings, that could facilitate this easily. (And that's before the sale of our house, which were initially just thinking to rent out.)
I am almost certain he wouldn't go for this idea....although I have been nervous to talk to him about it. He struggles with my spontaneous side and sometimes doesn't understand me. One minute I want to do 'this' and the next 'that'.... which is a little bit true.... but I also can work hard for things. I don't expect everything to happen right away, or land on my lap. I just have lots of goals.
I'm just eager to get moving, to do something meaningful again. Is it fair to ask him to do the walk in September with me? Or is it fair to say I want to go do it with or without him, in September, if we haven't moved by then?
I have been itching to go back for a while, but I knew for myself I needed to put some time between my last trip and the next one, to be able to go without the expectations of recreating the same trip. I'm ready. I'm itching to go....
how have those of you in relationships dealt with your loved ones?
Any advice from those that understand the pull of the Camino, and especially of those, with partners that have struggled in the other leaving.... is greatly appreciated!
Hi KSM - my advice is to have a discussion with your husband. An International move is big as is the move without a job at the other end. Reality bites and bills still have to be paid, and perhaps while you have savings, maybe your husband is just trying to ensure in the best possible way that you will both be secure. An International move, without a job and some travel tossed in is certainly possible, but it comes with challenges. I've done it myself a few times and while the planning and final days before departure are stressful, and it all works out in the end. Listening to each other and compromise is the key. The Camino is always going to be there as is England.
 
Sounds like you feel really restless. Waiting until September is too difficult - if your emigration plans work out and you are one or both in new jobs in the UK, chances are you won't be able to take time off in the first 3 months, and then it will be winter. Meantime, your restlessness is putting pressure on your husband to act in a way he feels uncomfortable with, but it is your own responsibility. I would therefore go and do your own walk now, without your husband. While he is missing you, he may job hunt with more energy.

In the end, your long term goals are in accord, which is great.
 
Last edited:
Maybe you can wait until your husband finds a job in the UK and he can negotiate a delayed start to employment. Then he would have the security and would feel free to walk with you. After all, if the new employer can wait while you pack up and move to the UK, then maybe an extra 3 or 4 weeks could be negotiated. In any case, when you get to the UK it is so easy to get over to Spain that you could walk the Camino a week at a time.
 
Get a spanish phone number with Airalo. eSim, so no physical SIM card. Easy to use app to add more funds if needed.
Hi KSM - my advice is to have a discussion with your husband. An International move is big as is the move without a job at the other end. Reality bites and bills still have to be paid, and perhaps while you have savings, maybe your husband is just trying to ensure in the best possible way that you will both be secure. An International move, without a job and some travel tossed in is certainly possible, but it comes with challenges. I've done it myself a few times and while the planning and final days before departure are stressful, and it all works out in the end. Listening to each other and compromise is the key. The Camino is always going to be there as is England.
Thank you for taking the time to respond. I definitely agree with you, at least one side of me. But I have actually been waiting for at least 4 years to move to England. He just buried his head for about 3 of those. I'm from England so it was always on the cards, when we got married.
You're right about him wanting to provide us the security, and I love him for that, as my job is a lot more freelance.
I think your right, I need to have an open conversation with him about it to hear his thoughts. I am very freespirited and he supports that about me, so it probably wouldn't surprise him too much of my thoughts! Lol

Thanks again!
 
The first edition came out in 2003 and has become the go-to-guide for many pilgrims over the years. It is shipping with a Pilgrim Passport (Credential) from the cathedral in Santiago de Compostela.
Sorry this will be my fourth,but I feel as exited as if it was my first.I actually wanted to celebrate my birthday on the Camino, but my family thought this "a step too far" so I fly to Spain 2 days later (to allow for the after party hangover).
Very nice! I'm a little jealous.... but mostly happy for you! I'm sure this time will be as amazing as all the rest!
Buen camino!
 
Hi @KSM - this is really tough, not an easy decision to make. It's a strange thing, the way the camino experience seem to be able to really get under the skin of some of us who participate in it, like very few other things, and yet many of us (me included) struggle to be able to articulate why that is, to those around us and closest to us at home. Personally, for me the camino was a fantastic experience (which I did alone) and my wife totally doesn't get it, at all. I think we're at the point now where I can probably go back at some stage in the next 1-2 years, but we will see how life progresses. We have lots of other competting things to balance, which offer their own rewards. In terms of advice on your dilemma, I suppose all I can say is that relationships are full of compromise, and only you and your husband can figure out what the right thing to do is... Talk to each other, see where it goes. I guess that in many respects life is like the camino - you don't always get what you want when you want it, but sometimes it turns out to be what you need. Stay positive, keep the faith - you'll get where you need to go.

Buen Camino!

Hi!
My husband tries to understand, and thinks he does, but I don't think he does whole heartily. I also want him to walk the Camino because he does seem a bit lost and I think he would love it once he gets there. Not just because I love it and think everyone will, but when we go hiking close to him he feels energised and in love with nature. He's also loved crowned land camping and just being away from it all. And then the spiritual side of it, he would gain so much from for his life right now. But that may be me also just trying to convince myself the whole idea is an awesome one! Lol

You said it best, you have lots of things competeing in your life and makes returning dependant on that. And of course we have to plan the Camino to fit in with our real lives to a certain extent.... but my other thought is... isn't there likely always something happening in our real lives to consider. I guess it comes down to which of those things in our real life can be put on the back burner for a few weeks?
Yes, relationships are full of compromise. I just need to find the courage to have an open conversation with him. In part I struggle to know whether to say something because to have lots of ideas and he thinks I'm a bit all over the place! (I don't agree lol)

Thank you for your last words.... reference to the Camino as that resonates so true.

Thanks again!
 
Ideal pocket guides for during & after your Camino. Each weighs only 1.4 oz (40g)!
Sounds like you feel really restless. Waiting until September is too difficult - if your emigration plans work out and you are one or both in new jobs in the UK, chances are you won't be able to take time off in the first 3 months, and then it will be winter. Meantime, your restlessness is putting pressure on your husband to act in a way he feels uncomfortable with, but it is your own responsibility. I would therefore go and do your own walk now, without your husband. While he is missing you, he may job hunt with more energy.

In the end, your long term goals are in accord, which is great.
Thank you. I like your different perspective. I think there way you put it really resonates with me, I just know how to put it into words.

I am very restless and i think that does impact my husband to feel more stressed by it.
Thank you again!
 
Maybe you can wait until your husband finds a job in the UK and he can negotiate a delayed start to employment. Then he would have the security and would feel free to walk with you. After all, if the new employer can wait while you pack up and move to the UK, then maybe an extra 3 or 4 weeks could be negotiated. In any case, when you get to the UK it is so easy to get over to Spain that you could walk the Camino a week at a time.
Hi
I guess that could be an option to. In my head I was only thinking that if he got a job he'd have to go right away. (And maybe without me initially) but there is definitely a option that they may be open to waiting.
He definitely is a person that needs security. May be I don't appreciate how much this is a good thing for us!
Thanks for taking the time to respond!
 

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