Welcome to the Forum, PetePie; glad to have you here
Yes, it is normal. Some of the mixed feelings comes from anxiety and homesickness from the thought of being away from loved ones and familiar routines for an extended period. Some feelings arise from thoughts of being a 'stranger in a strange land'; of being completely out of your element and having no one around you with whom you know like a friend or loved one.
Then there is the issue of doing something with which you have no experience; the feeling that you are at the bottom of a huge learning curve --- What do I do? Where do I start planning? What do I need? Will I be safe? what are the logistics for travel? How do I get the gear that I need?
Can I even do it?
Yeah, most have been there. But the good news is, you are in a forum with a wonderful group of people. Most are here to help people like you to achieve their pilgrimage goals. We can offer you encouragement, knowledge, and point you in the direction that will help you help yourself.
My suggestion to start is this:
- Make a list of questions and concerns that you have.
- Go to the Search Engine at the top of the Forum pages.
- Enter the words or phrase that you want more information about. You will get a huge amount of information to explore.
- If you find that you need help with anything, post a new thread so that your question or concern can be readily seen. If you post a question within someone else's thread, you won't receive as big of a response.
- Take a deep breath. Write down in large letters the reasons why you want to go on Camino. Place that piece of paper where you can see it every day. That way, when anxieties and fears threaten to overwhelm you, you can just breath, read what you have written, and focus on those reasons until the negative stuff fades.
- Remember that perfect timing as it relates to how you feel, scheduling, and day to day life issues, seldom align themselves perfectly. If one waits for such to occur, doing something like a pilgrimage will always be in danger of taking a back seat while you wait for that perfect alignment to happen.