Alasdair Kay
Member
- Time of past OR future Camino
- "May 2016 "
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Is this normal, and can I get back to normal again or will the longing get worse?
So I'm back from the most amazing 38 days ever walking from STJPDP to Finisterre and Muxia .... and life returns to normal. The problem is I've changed, and watching video's of the Camino makes me cry. Bizarrely I long to be awake in an Albergue at 5:30 am packing my rucksack and anticipating walking as dawn rises. I dream of mist over Castrojeriz at dawn, of wind blowing through the corn on the Meseta, dusk at O Ceberio, and the feel of the sea on my bare feet as I walked the last three km's on the beach at Finisterre in the mist. I long to see sunset at Muxia again and the longing hurts ... Is this normal, and can I get back to normal again or will the longing get worse?
Alastair - why ever you want to get back to 'normal'? (whatever that might be .)So I'm back from the most amazing 38 days ever walking from STJPDP to Finisterre and Muxia .... and life returns to normal. The problem is I've changed, and watching video's of the Camino makes me cry. Bizarrely I long to be awake in an Albergue at 5:30 am packing my rucksack and anticipating walking as dawn rises. I dream of mist over Castrojeriz at dawn, of wind blowing through the corn on the Meseta, dusk at O Ceberio, and the feel of the sea on my bare feet as I walked the last three km's on the beach at Finisterre in the mist. I long to see sunset at Muxia again and the longing hurts ... Is this normal, and can I get back to normal again or will the longing get worse?
Excellent perspective and advice- one of the beauties of the Camino is taking a personal leap of faith and risk- believing purely in yourself and the goodness and grace of others around you. You get a new perspective on life and return home where circumstances and people are the same. They have not been transformed. I hope to build off the strength and courage that it takes to depart on a journey of this magnitude and let it lead me afterward- no regretsThink 'New Normal. ' You'll never be able to jam yourself back into the way you were before--that's impossible, asking the clock to run backwards. So the task is to take what happened for you on the Camino and to integrate it, longing and all. The longing may not be about the Camino at all--perhaps (more deeply) it's about simplicity and authenticity and open-heartedness. Only you will know.
Bottom line is to be kind to yourself, and to be kind to those in your life who will not be able to understand from their own experience what you're talking about, and what you long for.
Now is probably not a time to make snap life-changing decisions or radical changes--but just to let it all settle for a bit and not to rush into anything when it's so tender.
And yes...perhaps plan your next pilgrimage.
Just a temporary illusion, but enjoy it while it lasts. with some luck a few bits and pieces of what you have experienced will stay with you, as you go back to who you are, under regular life circumstances, vs Camino illusions.
I think the key is to examine your life and figure out what's no longer working for you. Figure out how to incorporate the things you most enjoyed about the Camino into your life. The Camino has changed you, so figure out what you can change in your life to better fit the new you. We all still have our responsibilities and may not have the ability to make huge changes in our lives, but we can make incremental changes - our focus, how we specialize do free time, etc. I think that's part of the Camino - to be changed through the experience and then to take that back to our regular lives and incorporate what we can.
So I'm back from the most amazing 38 days ever walking from STJPDP to Finisterre and Muxia .... and life returns to normal. The problem is I've changed, and watching video's of the Camino makes me cry. Bizarrely I long to be awake in an Albergue at 5:30 am packing my rucksack and anticipating walking as dawn rises. I dream of mist over Castrojeriz at dawn, of wind blowing through the corn on the Meseta, dusk at O Ceberio, and the feel of the sea on my bare feet as I walked the last three km's on the beach at Finisterre in the mist. I long to see sunset at Muxia again and the longing hurts ... Is this normal, and can I get back to normal again or will the longing get worse?
so so trueLike Capecorps said - once you've opened Pandora's Box . . .
Each time I get to SdC it's "Never again!" - I set on number 5 next month.
Besides look up normal and you get:
View attachment 27528
and we, we happy few, we band of brothers are certainly none of the above!
Beautiful just beautifulI am losing precious days. I am degenerating into a machine for making money. I am learning nothing in this trivial world of men. I must break away and get out into the mountains to learn the news.
John Muir, 1883
beautiful thank you"But to have been,
This once, completely, even if only once:
To have been at one with the earth, seems beyond undoing."
Rainer Maria Rilke,
9th Duino Elegy
Hi Alasdair you are singing my song ...and everything you write i am also weeping.So I'm back from the most amazing 38 days ever walking from STJPDP to Finisterre and Muxia .... and life returns to normal. The problem is I've changed, and watching video's of the Camino makes me cry. Bizarrely I long to be awake in an Albergue at 5:30 am packing my rucksack and anticipating walking as dawn rises. I dream of mist over Castrojeriz at dawn, of wind blowing through the corn on the Meseta, dusk at O Ceberio, and the feel of the sea on my bare feet as I walked the last three km's on the beach at Finisterre in the mist. I long to see sunset at Muxia again and the longing hurts ... Is this normal, and can I get back to normal again or will the longing get worse?
Yes i believe so and also the camino is a drug the more you get the more you want.I know this isn't the sentiment of this forum as a whole, but I think it depends on what your "Normal" life entails. Personally, to a great extent, I was eager to get back to my Normal life. I enjoy my life and with the exception of a few times here and there I always have. It is by no means perfect (as judged by the world) but every day of it has been a blessing and has served purpose. I did want to keep some of the slow pace attitude that came with Camino and indeed I was disappointed about how quickly my American work-life overpowered my desire for to remain quiet. The first few days back at work I struggled to keep pace with my colleagues - information was being delivered and decisions were being made at what seemed like a breakneck pace. It was dizzying. I sat quietly in my office for a few days watching it all with some degree of astonishment. Too soon however, I was back at "full speed". It was a bit sad.
We walked Camino two years ago. And while it was an amazing journey and absolutely worthwhile, I can't say it changed my life nor was it the amazing spiritual or emotional journey that I'd heard so many speak of. With that said, I began to get the itch for another adventure a few months ago and another Camino was right near the top of the list. We are going back again in May2017 and I am excited to reconnect with Camino at an even slower pace this time.
A final thought - what if Camino is normal and your other life is the fabrication? Honestly I think we are more ideal to each other on Camino. Perhaps our sophistication and socialization are the falseness.
Very normal. Will most likely not get better. The solution is: Start planning your next Camino. That will give you some ease of mind, knowing that you will return.So I'm back from the most amazing 38 days ever walking from STJPDP to Finisterre and Muxia .... and life returns to normal. The problem is I've changed, and watching video's of the Camino makes me cry. Bizarrely I long to be awake in an Albergue at 5:30 am packing my rucksack and anticipating walking as dawn rises. I dream of mist over Castrojeriz at dawn, of wind blowing through the corn on the Meseta, dusk at O Ceberio, and the feel of the sea on my bare feet as I walked the last three km's on the beach at Finisterre in the mist. I long to see sunset at Muxia again and the longing hurts ... Is this normal, and can I get back to normal again or will the longing get worse?
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