selfishness on the camino

[+@^^]

when i first joined the aa as an active alcoholic
my sponsor asked what my reasons were for wanting to clean up my act
and i trotted out the usual reasons family kids wife job friends blah blah
he says
this is the most selfish 12 step programme in the world
you doing it only for yourself - eveything else is a bonus
.
thats the way i see the camino
its your pilgrimage
not your partners
not the kids
not the charity back home
.
thats not to say you can be dismissive of them
it just means
that if youre doing it for somebody else
its probably going to be disappointing
and at some level youre going to be let down
it can be distracting
and that gives you somebody else to blame when the going gets really tough
.
when this shift happens
it gives you full latitude to help others
with full love
but with total detachment
and no expectations
.
its for good reason
that the airlines instruct you to put the oxygen mask over your mouth first, and then to attend to the needs of others
.
IJS

 

[Abbeydore]

Hope you are able to Camino with your family sometime soon.
Thanks for sharing too.
My partners son is an an alcoholic(26);
Sadly has not reached the 'rock-bottom' point where he's attempting to take charge of his illness.

David

 

[methodist.pilgrim.98]

Interesting insight.

I spend my working life helping others, especially with their emotional and spiritual lives.

I travel solo on the Camino so I can be by myself, be responsible for no one else but me, and have a place where I can look at my own soul without the distractions of others.

In the short term very selfish but in the long term others benefit.

 

[LTfit]

Hi IJS,

I have been away from the Forum for quite some months (one day will get around to give an update) but when I saw your post I felt the call to react.

Your posts are always quite personal - at times humorous but often serious - but at the same time very relevant to us all. I commend your honesty and thank you for your participation in this Forum.

Hope to meet you one day on the Camino.

Cheers,
LT