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Ouch. Then you know how it feels. I hope it heals well for you. My wrist has started to hurt a lot again after they put on the new cast - I'm hoping that the reason is that they moved it around a bit. If the cast is the reason, I'll have to get another new cast... I really hate the pain. I'm not a very patient person when it comes to being in pain - it should be over as soon as possible, preferably yesterday. =)I broke my wrist on July 13th- into the joint unfortunately.
I can see why. This isn't a walk in the park - the broken arm or the walk itself. =) If it had happened to me on the Camino, that would have been all I needed to give up.Plucky lady! She was deservedly famous.
I'm quite worried about falling and breaking my wrist again, or even worse, the other wrist as well...i must admit, your fall, Hilda, has got me a bit more cautious in my run-up to departure
atlanticheart said:I didn't think he needed to know I'd been back up on the horse a week after the accident... and that I'll go back and do it again this afternoon, hopefully. =)
I hope so. I hope it'll help. Plus, how bad can your feet really hurt compared to a broken arm?When you come to do the Camino you can remember that and use it to help overcome your Camino fears.
I know, it's almost a compulsion. I haven't gotten back up on the horse that threw me off yet, but I've been riding two others. Since I only have one arm we do "pony riding" - my instructor leading me around for 30-40 mins. Not quite as fun as galloping at breakneck speed, bareback through the forest, but it's better than nothing. =)Hilda, as a horse lover, I know exactly why you were back on that horse. We can't help ourselves.
Answer-'Most nations have draped flags from their balconies but from the New Zealand towers hang a massive portrait of Sir Edmund Hillary and Tenzing Norgay under the words: “It’s not the mountain we conquer, but ourselves.”'
I'm not sure who wrote it.
I know that, and I've stopped so many times it's become a pattern. I'm not going to get anywhere in life if I don't put myself through pain and distress, because most new situations scare me. I wish it wasn't so, but it is. Just have to feel the fear, stress and pain and push on anyway.There is no shame in stopping something that is causing you pain and distress.
I've received tons of it. =) This is a wonderful forum, full of wonderful people.And I hope this community has offered you empathy, compassion and acceptance.
This was really lovely David. Read it on the morning I walked from Viana, and it put a smile on my face. =)As I head to bed here on the west coast of north America, you will be starting a new day in Spain. I hope you slept well, and that the day is beautiful, and that you move forward, in whichever direction you choose, without regrets.
Your photos are stunning! I hope you add some more... It is amazing for me to see the late summer/autumn view of the fields near Los Arcos, because I saw them a few months earlier when everything was still so green.atlanticheart said:Here's a link to some photos from my Camino on Flickr. Hilda
atlanticheart said:stpatricksbhoy and Valerie, thank you. =)
Valerie, I have no plans of leaving the forum. Maybe, instead of a camino, I'll plan a photo-journey along the camino next time. I think that's more my kind of journey.
Hilda
Yes, a much lengthier discussion than I had anticipated. But, fear is universal, so I guess it's a good topic. =)What a response you have instigated Hilda
I'm also a person who wants to be in control all the time, and it's very difficult to let go of that control. I certainly didn't manage when I was doing the camino, but I tried, and I think that's important. My fear didn't really go away at any time during my camino, but it did become more manageable. In the first half of my trip it was really difficult, but it got easier after that. I think you'll be just fine on the camino. =)SabineP said:And yes if I think about it logically life is unpredictable and I have to deal with that. But I'm a person who wants to keep control of things and situations...so it is a day to day peptalk with myself to "let go"...
Caminando said:Your fears are, I think, nothing to do with the Camino. You will carry them with you everywhere till you manage to deal with them, and I hope you can. Fears are so crippling. Yet these fears you mention are all self-focusing; in other words your area of interest is yourself. You say you don’t want to meet others on the Camino and will cut yourself off from them; this too is an example of self focusing. It may not be the time for you to do this; unless you use this chance to address your fears. If you do try it, consider leaving the camera at home; it can be a way of displacing the present. Good luck!
I applaud your interest in facing this and I wish you a fabulous Camino. You CAN do it!Security is mostly a superstition. It does not exist in nature, nor do the children of men as a whole experience it. Avoiding danger is no safer in the long run than outright exposure. Life is either a daring adventure, or nothing.
Helen Keller
Some on here might remember me from 2008, when I was planning my pilgrimage. I only got as far as Hunto before I gave up, and I’m still not sure I’ve forgiven myself for giving up so easily. But I got so scared. Ever since then, from time to time, I’ve felt the desire to walk the camino again but nothing has ever come of it. I’m simply terrified, yet I still long to do it. I can feel the pull of it.
I’ve been thinking, considering, doing it in September/October this year, but doing it my way. I’d send my bag ahead every day, and only carry a lighter pack with water, food and my camera. Because I really want to bring my real camera (a Nikon D90) and not a small point and shoot. I don’t think I’ll walk this more than once and I want the best images I can get to remember it. And I’d be staying in hotels the entire way. I’ve even made up a plan where I can stay at hotels for every stage of the walk. I’d be starting in Pamplona, instead of St Jean which is the “official” starting place, to eliminate the strenuous walk across the Pyrenees. I’ve been thinking of just doing a week, but it’s not enough. To me that would be failing, which is ridiculous, but that’s the way it is. It’s all or nothing.
But even when I modify it to more fit my needs, it still scares me. I’m afraid of failing again. I’m afraid it will be too overwhelming, that my feet will hurt too much and that I won’t be able to do the distances I’ve planned. I’m afraid I’m going to spend the entire trip crying, which is what happened last time. I’m afraid I’m going to be homesick, that my body will hurt, that I’ll get sick.
Last time I was also very stressed and anxious. I felt nauseous because of this and threw up a lot. I’m afraid I’ll spend five weeks being anxious and hence be miserable the entire time. Because I’m afraid of new situations. The camino would pretty much be five weeks of new situations each day, and I’m not sure how well I’d be able to cope with that.
Of course, there’s also the possibility that I’m worrying needlessly. But knowing myself, and knowing what happened last time, I know that I will be afraid a lot. I just, don’t know what to do. Because on the one hand, I want this so much, but on the other the mere thought terrifies me and makes me not want to do it.
But, I really do think I'd benefit greatly from doing it. I'd learn to handle all those fears, and if I made it, it would be an incredible boost to my self-esteem. I'd get to improve my spanish and meet many new, wonderful people. I think, maybe I should do it just because I am so afraid of it.
So, some random questions based on all this…
When, if you were, were you afraid on the camino? How do you deal with it?
Just how much do your feet hurt?
How difficult is it?
How long does it take before it gets easier? A week? Two weeks? Does it ever get easier?
Sorry about the long post. I just don’t know who else to talk to about this… no one seems to understand, and I get that, it is somewhat of a crazy idea, really...
Hilda
Thanks Phillypilgrim,Hi Charlie,
I feel compelled to respond to your heartfelt post. I walked the Camino alone this past fall. I did get sick, I didn't get lost, and although I did not feel "homesick" I did at one point wonder when this trek was going to end! It is a long walk, which means that like the terrain, it is an up and down emotional journey (for some of us, not all). But, it's okay. I realized I had a "relationship" with the Camino, and like a relationship it is varied and changes. I am glad that I walked slowly, as I personally needed the time to surrender and fully embrace it. It is a lovely process.
Dear Hilda,
Bless you for having the courage to even WANT to face your fear again. This shows great resolve, and I encourage you to try again. Setting goals for yourself that you know are realistic is a great step forward. If you KNOW you don't like communal living, then you can find private lodging for a price, and it's not always expensive. It can be even LESS costly if you can find a walking mate you can get along with and are willing to share lodging with. I will be happy to send you information on the privates that we stayed in, if you are interested. I did not want to get bedbugs, and so we often took a private room.
In almost any town you can go to the bar and ask if there are habitaciones in town... many people have a room they will rent you. The rooms are almost always cleaner than the refugios, and almost always have a shared or private bath, but when you share it's with one or two people, not 25.
Your feet. If your feet hurt, chances are it is because your shoes are too small and you're carrying too much weight. Try buying your shoes 1.5 sizes larger than you normally wear. Be sure you get a shoe that is FLEXIBLE but with a sturdy sole. I love New Balance Trail Shoes. Can you get them where you live? They have a huge toe box, so your toes can spread out when you walk and you don't get blisters. They do not need breaking in. You can buy them, and walk right out onto the Camino!
Try wearing 2 pair of socks. I don't remember if you did this. One pair should be a very thin liner, like we wore when we were children. The outer pair should be thicker, and many people like SmartWool, me included. They are cushioned in good places.
Buy COMPEED and carry it with you. The MINUTE you first start feeling a hot spot on your foot, STOP and put on the compeed. You never take it off. You wear it in the shower and keep it on until it falls off on its own. It will keep you from getting blisters.
Also, please consider buying a special gel insert made especially for trekking and hiking. Take the OLD insert out and put in the new, cushioned one. It will protect the soles of your feet from rocks and the constant slamming down onto the pavement. Here in the US they cost about $30. Not sure where you are from. New Balance sells them and you can cut them to fit your shoe.
Stop every 2 hours, sit down, take off your shoes, and give yourself a foot rub! Rest for at least 10 minutes before you put the shoes on and walk again.
If there is a fountain, put your feet into the ice water.
When you stop at night, soak your feet in COLD salt water. It really DOES help toughen them up.
Don't walk full stages. There is no law that says you must walk 20 kilometers every day! When I first start walking, I'm only able to do about 17.... that's my limit... and my feet stop working at 17 k... so I try to plan accordingly. If that means I only walk 12 k, then I only walk 12 that day! Better to ENJOY the walking than to torture yourself!
I met a young woman on my last Camino who was terribly overweight. She was walking to get herself in better physical condition, but because of her weight, she was only able to go about 10 kilometers each day in the beginning. By the time she go to Santiago 6 weeks later, she was walking regular 20 k stages and had dropped about 20 pounds! Great success. But if she found herself tired, she'd simply call a cab and take it to the next place. So what? She knew her limitations and followed her inner guide and she finished the Camino!
Next, REALLY take a good look at your pack. It should not weigh more than 10% of your body weight, pack included. You've probably read that over and over on this forum. The reason is because it is true. If you can afford to have a company carry your bags, then do it, especially if you're paying for lodging. There are so many items that you do not need that people pack.
It feels to me that you REALLY want to try this again. And if you WANT to, then you will. Please feel free to PM me if you just need a sounding board.
I'm praying for your success!
Annie
I'm not sure if you are addressing me but feel free to PM me.I just read your post and I have to say I found it very helpful. I'm doing this in October and am concerned because I have a big ankle problem. I suffered a terrible fracture about 10 years ago and walk with a limp most days. I fear my ankle will swell and force me to stop more often than I would like to and most likely for longer periods of time than I would like. However, I am driven to do this. There are so many reasons. The most important I think is for the spiritual rewards I will get out of this. I want them. I expect them and because of that, I will receive them. I'll offer up my discomfort for this. Please pray for me as well as I am going to need it. Normally I would never ask this of anyone but, if you would allow me to ask you questions directly or perhaps use you for guidance I'd really appreciate that. I asked only because I know asking for help is the first step towards humility. I have a friend who completed the Camino and she has been so generous with her advice. But having more than one source may be even more beneficial. What say you?
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