Couples that walk the camino together

[jirit]

Interesting article about love and couples that walk together.

So the big $64k question does it apply to couples that walk together on the camino?

http://healthland.time.com/2013/10/23/men-walk-slower-when-theyre-in-love/

 

[Cejanus]

I did so much want to walk with my partner but that was not to be. Unless there is a 100% commitment to walking the Camino by both I don't think it is wise to compromise. For me it was a personal journey and whilst it is so easily shared that does not necessarily mean walking together. It was also the first time in 42 years that I had ever been alone by myself.

 

[Magnara]

Interesting article about love and couples that walk together.

So the big $64k question does it apply to couples that walk together on the camino?

http://healthland.time.com/2013/10/23/men-walk-slower-when-theyre-in-love/

We always walk together on all of our pilgrim journeys, and my husband does walk slower than would be his solo gait. Even when we are not talking, it is so nice to walk side by side for weeks on end.
Maggie Ramsay
"The Italian Camino" (Amazon)

 

[MendiWalker]

Both my wife and I are mountain hikers. We hike with our mountain clubs, friends and at other times together. We have always hiked together and we wait for each other too. Sometimes I wait for her and at others she waits for me. When we "discovered" the Camino same thing happened. I would wait for her and other times she would wait for me.

I´ve read on other posts on the forum that some couples just meet up at the albergue. I respect it but don´t understand it. I think if you want to walk alone then just do it, walk alone. You don´t need your other half there with you. And if you walk with your partner then you should walk with your partner.

I don´t think its about love it´s just respect.

Buen Camino!

 

[fortview]

Interesting . John and I walked the Frances together last year. We walked separately part of each day, out of choice, and to have space to think and be. We had both just retired ( btw isn't the Spanish for " retired" a wonderful word - " jubilado" ? ) and it was a wonderful way to start our new life together. We discovered so much about our relationship, and how we were as a couple with other people.
And this year we have walked the Salvador and Primitivo. This time, I felt John had to compromise, and slow down more, and help me, as I really struggled on the Primitivo, and got sick which didn't help.
And just last night we started talking about the next camino, and how we are both feeling a need to walk the Frances again, but at different times, and alone. The next adventure?

 

[jmcarp]

My wife and I walked the Camino Frances this year between mid-August and late September. Yes, I slowed down for her on the uphill portions, but she slowed down for me on the downhills, so it all evened out. What we actually did was walk at our own pace for a 100 or maybe 150 meters, then stop and wait for the other to catch up. On level ground we walk pretty much at the same pace, so it never was an issue. I can't imagine doing this pilgrimage together as a couple and not making whatever minor adjustments to our pace that were necessary to keep us together. We are strongly committed to the concept that in the sacrament of marriage the two shall be one, and to have done otherwise would have been, for us at least, a betrayal of that outlook on our relationship.

Jim

 

[Canucks]

We just finished a couple of days ago and I have a slightly faster natural gait. In addition my wife's toes were painful so I would walk ahead a bit.....always within talking distance.....then stop, but generally pull ahead slightly. It is more of a practicality, especially on the uphill parts where my rhythym would result in a much faster ascent.
Only a couple of times where we were each talking to individual spouses of another couple, where they were at different speeds also, did I pull ahead further and then we would both stop and wait for our partners.

 

[wayfarer]

I walked the Sarria - Santiago section with my wife about a month ago. We both have different walking speeds, I walk faster than her, except when shopping, when the pace is reversed. I walked slower to be with her and I must say I saw a lot more than when I walked last time. We had more breaks, took more photos and chatted all the way, it was great and I hope we can do it again. Last year I walked with some couples, not married, whose relationship did not last long after the finish, and some married ones who looked like they might divorce by the time we reached Santiago. I suppose its a lottery, it may or may not work out.

 

[backpack45]

Ralph definitely has to slow down for me--the exception being on long, steep uphills, which I am usually stronger at doing. Sometimes I like to be by myself, so I purposefully walk a several feet behind him so I can take more photos, get lost in my own thoughts, and don't have to worry about walking into a post or something. I generally have two speeds--and if you don't like the first one, you definitely won't like the second one (even slower). The major exception to that rule is when there is lightning--when I hear that I can quickly move into warp speed. This all works for us (happily married for 24 years), but I can see other couples "hiking their own hike."

 

[Caplen]

My guy is naturally a much faster hiker than me, but we always walk together. We might be in silence the whole way, but we want to experience our walks together, and take care of each other, physically and emotionally, when necessary.
I did my first Caminos 12+ years ago, solo. I'm so excited to be sharing the next one, his first, with him, every step.

 

[Tincatinker]

The Beloved and I have similar paces, 4k an hour in strolling mode 5k when we're hungry. We have hiked together now for 35 years; our first holiday together was a stretch of the South West Peninsula path in the UK. She is faster uphill I am faster down. We wait for each other when the need arises. We will walk apart but seldom out of sight.

 

[wayfarer]

"We've walked both sides of every street
Through all kinds of windy weather.
But that was never our defeat
As long as we could walk together.

So there's no need for turning back
'Cause all roads lead to where we stand.
And I believe we'll walk them all
No matter what we may have planned."

These lyrics of Don McLeans "Crossroads" always remind me of the Camino

 

[Laliibeans]

My partner is the complete opposite of me when it comes to the outdoors. He hates hiking (though since neither of us drive we walk most places anyway) and I don't want to walk with someone who isn't enjoying themselves. It makes it a little bit hard, I think next time I do the Overland I'll ask my sister to join me (another avid hiker). I love being alone but I think safety comes first when hiking and you should always have someone with you, just within your sight lines at least.

 

[freescot]

My partner and I walked together from Ribadeo to Santiago. Before she agreed to the Camino she said, "I don't want to suffer." I am a slow walker averaging 3km/hr with short breaks. We began be setting off after a leisurely breakfast and covering about 4km before lunch. For the first few days, we managed about 10 km per day. The albergue routine soon won out and after a week she was the first to rustle plastic bags in the morning and we walked the final week averaging 20km/day. For me it is avery different experience from a solitary Camino and eaually wonderful in a different way.

 

[jirit]

I was not surprised to find this book...

http://www.amazon.com/dp/0802405932/?tag=casaivar02-20

Not really a book about couples walking the camino together...

... but more about marriage but maybe worth a read for those couples planning on or have walked the camino

Since in humble my opinion "the camino reflects life as life reflects the camino"

 

[wayfarer]

In Ireland couples who want to get married in the church must complete a marriage guidance cource, I think if they were made walk the Camino together it would be far more benificial as they would have a better idea how to cope with many different situations as a team.