Re: Walking with a companion
Post by Portia1 on 29 Sep 2011, 09:23
This time I walked with five companions. People ask me how the Camino was and I say it was very different this time. Then they look at me and wonder if they should ask why. And it was different. One of the people I walked with this time is someone I met on the Frances. We have a similar walking pace, we enjoy companionable silence sprinkled here and there with a little conversation, and we have similar tastes in food, etc. We agreed that when we do this again, it will be just the two of us! (Notice that we are already talking about doing it again.)
Taking people with you who have heard the stories but are not prepared for the reality and its demands can be a substantial change in the experience. "I know you said it was hard, but I didn't think it was going to be THIS hard." "You're the leader, YOU tell us where the arrow is" (when there are no arrows and no one else takes any initiative to noodle it out). "I don't like the alberques--sharing a bathroom, having to wait, listening to all the noise, having to share space........ Why don't we stay in a hotel?" It was draining at times to be with people who wanted what you had but were not willing or able to let themselves be opened to it. It was also difficult managing all the different expectations, the unwillingness at times to communicate that someone wanted to go slower or faster and that it was OK for others to move along at their own pace, the whining when things did not go as planned--as though someone else could have made it much better. I think it is best to do your own Camino by yourself the first time so that you know for yourself what it makes it work for you. I know there are those (believe me, they were the ones who wanted to go but only if someone else took the responsibility) who would never attempt this by themselves--but if I learned anything this time around, it is that the Camino cannot do its work if you are distracted by trying to push spaghetti around on a plate!
In addition, when you are moving along as a "pack" it is harder to encounter and get to know fellow pilgrims who are not part of the group. I/we did but it took special effort. And later in the walk, when there was enough grumbling that we began staying in hostels rather than alberques, it was even more difficult. I treasure the challenges of sharing space with people who are not always kind or considerate or even sane.
I finished this time with a sense of incompleteness. Perhaps it was that we walked for only two weeks. Perhaps it was because the group dynamics required so much energy and I discovered that I barely had any time to journal. Perhaps it was because two of our number were chatters. Who knows exactly what gave me this sense but it is there........ And yet when I returned home, I discovered that peace/serenity had indeed entered my heart and gave me strength for the whirlwind I encountered first thing.
!).
