jamesmcsparron
New Member
- Time of past OR future Camino
- Next Camino 29/07/2023
Last Camino 03/08/2018
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When I started I was all about going "fast and furious" until I finally realized that it wasn't enjoyable. I still had the military mindset of "get there fast" in my head. I hard a talk with myself and said, "Hey, why are you in a hurry?" Then I decided that going slower was best for me as I could talk to more people along the way. When I finally made it to Santiago I understood that (for me) the people and conversations along the way were much more rewarding than simply getting there quickly. Next time I will walk even slower!When I have to walk to the next Albergue I usually want to get there fast. Get my heart and lungs pumping, work the leg muscles and sweat like I'm in a sauna! My wife however, likes to take it slow and have several breaks to catch her breath, spend some time absorbing the surroundings and chat to whoever wants to share a conversation.
This would seriously annoy me. Especially when other pilgrims would pass us. Pilgrims who were a good bit older than us, who were perhaps limping, or were carrying some extra weight. When they passed us I would imagine they were thinking how unfit we were, while I would be thinking, if I could just walk at the speed I wanted to, I'd leave everyone in the dust!
Of course if I'd say this to my wife she would sarcastically say that I was such a big man, who needed to prove how tough he was and to go on ahead if I felt she was slowing me down! I would then huff and stamp on at a faster pace. I'd keep looking back to see how far ahead I was getting. Then I'd wait because after mulling it over in my head I'd realise I was being childish and that we were supposed to be doing the walk together! When she caught up, she'd just walk right past, ignoring me so I'd storm off again until I was just around a corner or brow of a hill. Then I'd wait again. This would go on for days until one day as we walked together, deep in conversation, one which she was really engrossed in, I noticed her pace had speeded up. It looked like she thought it important that I heard what she was talking about so was keeping pace incase I got out of ears reach. Once I realised this I began increasing my stride and lo and behold so did she!
I'd found the accelerator pedal!
Our pace got faster. Not as fast as I'd have liked but much better. I slowed down a little and she sped up a little and we met in the middle.
I've walked 3 and heading out on the 4th in September with my husband. I used to get annoyed that he got a lot more breaks waiting for me than I did. I was ok with him going ahead to the next town and waiting but he insisted on waiting for me. Consider maybe your wife is just as annoyed with your hiking style. That said he isn't out to prove anything physically. His legs are longer and I take twice as many steps.When I have to walk to the next Albergue I usually want to get there fast. Get my heart and lungs pumping, work the leg muscles and sweat like I'm in a sauna! My wife however, likes to take it slow and have several breaks to catch her breath, spend some time absorbing the surroundings and chat to whoever wants to share a conversation.
This would seriously annoy me. Especially when other pilgrims would pass us. Pilgrims who were a good bit older than us, who were perhaps limping, or were carrying some extra weight. When they passed us I would imagine they were thinking how unfit we were, while I would be thinking, if I could just walk at the speed I wanted to, I'd leave everyone in the dust!
Of course if I'd say this to my wife she would sarcastically say that I was such a big man, who needed to prove how tough he was and to go on ahead if I felt she was slowing me down! I would then huff and stamp on at a faster pace. I'd keep looking back to see how far ahead I was getting. Then I'd wait because after mulling it over in my head I'd realise I was being childish and that we were supposed to be doing the walk together! When she caught up, she'd just walk right past, ignoring me so I'd storm off again until I was just around a corner or brow of a hill. Then I'd wait again. This would go on for days until one day as we walked together, deep in conversation, one which she was really engrossed in, I noticed her pace had speeded up. It looked like she thought it important that I heard what she was talking about so was keeping pace incase I got out of ears reach. Once I realised this I began increasing my stride and lo and behold so did she!
I'd found the accelerator pedal!
Our pace got faster. Not as fast as I'd have liked but much better. I slowed down a little and she sped up a little and we met in the middle.
When I walked with my husband we started together then we would find our own pace. When we reached a town we would wait for the other person. Sometimes we walked together sometimes not. It worked for us. Buen CaminoWhen I have to walk to the next Albergue I usually want to get there fast. Get my heart and lungs pumping, work the leg muscles and sweat like I'm in a sauna! My wife however, likes to take it slow and have several breaks to catch her breath, spend some time absorbing the surroundings and chat to whoever wants to share a conversation.
This would seriously annoy me. Especially when other pilgrims would pass us. Pilgrims who were a good bit older than us, who were perhaps limping, or were carrying some extra weight. When they passed us I would imagine they were thinking how unfit we were, while I would be thinking, if I could just walk at the speed I wanted to, I'd leave everyone in the dust!
Of course if I'd say this to my wife she would sarcastically say that I was such a big man, who needed to prove how tough he was and to go on ahead if I felt she was slowing me down! I would then huff and stamp on at a faster pace. I'd keep looking back to see how far ahead I was getting. Then I'd wait because after mulling it over in my head I'd realise I was being childish and that we were supposed to be doing the walk together! When she caught up, she'd just walk right past, ignoring me so I'd storm off again until I was just around a corner or brow of a hill. Then I'd wait again. This would go on for days until one day as we walked together, deep in conversation, one which she was really engrossed in, I noticed her pace had speeded up. It looked like she thought it important that I heard what she was talking about so was keeping pace incase I got out of ears reach. Once I realised this I began increasing my stride and lo and behold so did she!
I'd found the accelerator pedal!
Our pace got faster. Not as fast as I'd have liked but much better. I slowed down a little and she sped up a little and we met in the middle.
This is me and my husband's solution as well. We usually stay together, as he refuses to let me walk alone. He is very protective that way. I don't complain because he is my best friend and we enjoy walking and talking together.-- he carries about 22 pounds and I carry about 8. This slows him down a bit and makes it easier for us to stay together. I sure can't complain!!! I'm sure that he'd prefer not to carry the extra weight but he doesn't seem to mind and says he likes that it gives him a better workout. And it does help us keep a more equal pace walking.
Did you know or discuss the differences in your walking speeds before you started? Did you try to come to some agreement..to walk alone part of the time? Why would you try and manipulate your wife into walking at a pace that could cause her injury?This would seriously annoy me. Especially when other pilgrims would pass us. Pilgrims who were a good bit older than us, who were perhaps limping, or were carrying some extra weight. When they passed us I would imagine they were thinking how unfit we were, while I would be thinking, if I could just walk at the speed I wanted to, I'd leave everyone in the dust!
I have been wondering how much of this description is some combination of hyperbole and artistic licence. Of the many different ways one might walk with a close companion, what you have described would be one that I would thoroughly recommend avoiding. I am not even sure that what appears to be a quite self-centred explanation for your wife's improved pace makes the outcome appear palatable. I could only ponder whether her walking fitness had improved to the point where she was more comfortable maintaining your pace, and had nothing to do with your view that she was hanging on your every word. I hope the description you have provided of a thoroughly unpleasant and manipulative individual is more fiction than fact.When I have to walk to the next Albergue I usually want to get there fast. Get my heart and lungs pumping, work the leg muscles and sweat like I'm in a sauna! My wife however, likes to take it slow and have several breaks to catch her breath, spend some time absorbing the surroundings and chat to whoever wants to share a conversation.
This would seriously annoy me. Especially when other pilgrims would pass us. Pilgrims who were a good bit older than us, who were perhaps limping, or were carrying some extra weight. When they passed us I would imagine they were thinking how unfit we were, while I would be thinking, if I could just walk at the speed I wanted to, I'd leave everyone in the dust!
Of course if I'd say this to my wife she would sarcastically say that I was such a big man, who needed to prove how tough he was and to go on ahead if I felt she was slowing me down! I would then huff and stamp on at a faster pace. I'd keep looking back to see how far ahead I was getting. Then I'd wait because after mulling it over in my head I'd realise I was being childish and that we were supposed to be doing the walk together! When she caught up, she'd just walk right past, ignoring me so I'd storm off again until I was just around a corner or brow of a hill. Then I'd wait again. This would go on for days until one day as we walked together, deep in conversation, one which she was really engrossed in, I noticed her pace had speeded up. It looked like she thought it important that I heard what she was talking about so was keeping pace incase I got out of ears reach. Once I realised this I began increasing my stride and lo and behold so did she!
I'd found the accelerator pedal!
Our pace got faster. Not as fast as I'd have liked but much better. I slowed down a little and she sped up a little and we met in the middle.
We finished our Camino.I can’t see how your approach is meeting in the middle. She’s not doing it like she prefers, e.g. slowly. She’s accommodating you.
Have you finished your Camino yet?
I hope her accommodations don’t cause tendinitis, blisters or other ailments that really cause a slow down!
Did you know or discuss the differences in your walking speeds before you started? Did you try to come to some agreement..to walk alone part of the time? Why would you try and manipulate your wife into walking at a pace that could cause her injury?
I walk with my sister who is also my best friend. She is 84. I am much faster on the hills than she is. But I am perfectly fine slowing down or pausing when she gets winded. Yes, most people will pass us by, but I could care less what they think. I don’t have a need for their approval. My priority is to enjoy our walk together.
"Hyperbole and artistic licence"? There may be some of that alright. Why spoil a story with accuracy and truth?I have been wondering how much of this description is some combination of hyperbole and artistic licence. Of the many different ways one might walk with a close companion, what you have described would be one that I would thoroughly recommend avoiding. I am not even sure that what appears to be a quite self-centred explanation for your wife's improved pace makes the outcome appear palatable. I could only ponder whether her walking fitness had improved to the point where she was more comfortable maintaining your pace, and had nothing to do with your view that she was hanging on your every word. I hope the description you have provided of a thoroughly unpleasant and manipulative individual is more fiction than fact.
We have met people who are very competitive on our caminos and with something to prove physically. Interestingly it was from people older than we were! We just let them go on. Buh bye. Lol.As someone that has never viewed walking the Camino as a competition of speed with other pilgrims, all of whom could care less about how fast you are walking BTW, I honestly feel badly for your wife for having to endure your IMO odd obsession.
We have met people who are very competitive on our caminos and with something to prove physically. Interestingly it was from people older than we were! We just let them go on. Buh bye. Lol.
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